So, I've been getting into a good exercise routine as my surgery date is quickly approaching (July 8th). I've really enjoyed going to Water aerobics classes and making it a part of my daily routine. Today after the class, I was talking to the instructor and told her how much I was enjoying her classes. I then shared with her the fact that I was having surgery in less than two weeks. As soon as I said it, I could tell from the look on her face that I shouldn't have mentioned it. She then began asking me all kinds of questions like, "Have you tried eating healthier? Eating less? Going to Weight Watchers?" I wanted to scream back at her, "OF COURSE I HAVE!!!", but instead, I just nodded my head and tried to wrap the conversation up. As I was leaving, she handed me a business card about a nutrition program she wanted me to look into before jumping into anything. Ugh! It is so frustrating that you can't share something that you've researched, worked hard to prepare for, and are making major adjustments to your lifestyle to make this entire process a success....just to be judged. I know it's not the first time and probably won't be the last time people look down on me for having the surgery. I am excited about this decision and feel like I don't want to have to keep it a secret, but I also don't want to have to explain myself or feel like people are going to look down on me based on a decision to better myself. Has anyone else dealt with something like this? Who have you shared the info with that you are having or have had surgery with? What have you told people after the surgery when they ask about your weight loss???

If anyone said that to me, I probably could not resist the urge to snap at them, saying something like, "Really? Just diet and exercise. Thank you! I've never heard that before. Not ever."

At this point, really, I don't have patience for ignorant comments.

i think for people who have never had a weight problem, this is a reasonable question.

It is funny that you mentioned that. I was thinking about that today when I finished Spinning class. Then I thought it us none of her business. I am going to tell her I am having surgery and when I am cleared to come back to spinning. I will be back. This is my journey no one else's. I am tired of worrying about what others think. If I spend my time doing that I could be dead or have a heart attack. The people who matter know and they have seen me lose weight and gain it back. The maintenance part of weight loss is the hardest. Some people do not understand.

- sorry just needed to vent.

that is too bad. I guess that is why I am telling nobody but my wife.... misinformation seems to be the true enemy. best of luck next week!!!

Years ago at Assertiveness Skills classes I learned the value of the phrase "No offense, but .... " said in a very calm and polite tone.

Examples: "No offense, but suggesting I lose weight with diet and exercise is rather insulting. I'm an intelligent person and I'm aware of all the conventional ways to lose weight."

Or: "No offense, but although you're entitled to your opinion, my decision to have WLS is a personal one and not up for discussion."

Or even: "No offense, but I would prefer that you keep your thoughts on the matter to yourself."

And then either change the subject or walk away.

Only my husband and one close friend know I'm having surgery. Post-op I think I'll have to deal with some comments, once the rapid loss becomes obvious. We live in a senior condo community; my husband and I are mind-our-own-business types, but some of our neighbors are real busybodies.

What I've never understood is that it seems to be fine to talk about your facelift, botox and boob job, that's all well and good, but having WLS is some kind of failure and it makes people uncomfortable.

I was banded in 2009 (it's slipped and I'm working through the process to revise to a sleeve). I found that it worked for me not to volunteer anything, but if someone asked me directly I told them. Most of those people were waiting for me to give them some divine secret so they could lose weight too.

Yes.I only told my immediate family and my supervisor. We work for a large hospital so a patient's privacy is super important.and against the law to share.so I knew that if anyone else at work found out.they would be a legal issue. The day I was approved I called my older sister and the first words out of her mouth were, "oh you're cheating"---- that kinda set mr up to receive more negative feedback..and I didn't want that.I wish I could tell everyone I know because iam so excited with my journey to.date, but I can't...so it is what it is.When they ask me how I've lost weight. I tell them the truth, I cut out alot of food types amd alchohol in my diet.no more fast food 4 dayd a week.and I am more active.and I eat alot less..all are true.so iam so happy to have found.this site.it is so helpful to me to.have an outlet to discuss this big.life changing part of my life.HW-252 start weight-211 SW-190 CW-119 surgery date 7-3-13. :-)