I am having surgery in April & I have a 1 year old. Did anyone have issues lifting or caring for their babies after surgey? How long was it before you could be supermom again?

I am a babysitting Granny! I babysit for my grandaughter who was 16 months old when I had surgery. She was walking good, so I could let her hold my hand and climb into the high chair, or up into my lap (oh but thos little elbows were killer!). I tried not to pick her up from a dead lift for about a week, but then, we just went back to life as usual---except for the fact that we can now share a kids meal!!!

If she was in my lap, I would go ahead and stand up with her, just holding her close to my body.Now keep in mind she is a small baby. She is 2 now and is not yet 20 pounds. What I tried to avoid was her standing there with her arms out, and me bending and lifting her straight up. I didn't have any problems with it. I had a very easy surgery and easy recovery---I hope you do to!!

Several other April surgical candidates have started a thread devoted to you guys!!! They are talking back and forth with us April 2006 banders. We have an exercise challenge going that some want to participate in---others just want to have the support and commeraderie of others banded around the same time. Be sure to check them out, they seem like really fun people!!!

Good Luck on your surgery!!!

Kat

I have a 21mo grandson who weighs 38 lbs. The surgeon told me not to lift over 10 lbs for two weeks following surgery...I miss picking him up and placing him in the crib. Right now I am letting him crawl up onto my lap to read his books, but no overnight stays until this weekend when I can pick him up again...carefully

I have a toddler who just turned 2 and baby who will be 1 this spring!

Since I am not telling anyone but my husband, I will only have him to help me. He works from home, but is a busy sales rep so he can't be home for more than a few days to help me.

I plan on changing diapers on the floor instead of the changing table.

When daddy is not home to help, I plan on letting toddler eat meals and Snacks at the coffeetable, putting his booster seat on the floor right up to the coffee table. The baby's highchair is one of those that "sits" on a regular chair and is held in place by straps, I could put that on the floor as well, just barely having to lift him up into it. I better practice now. The baby is already 22 pounds!

I will buy lots of those "toddler entrees" that look like mini tv dinners and Pasta buckets. Easy stuff that dad can do quickly, or me. My baby can take a bottle in his bouncy seat- something I hate to do, but with a toddler on the loose, it's sometimes necessary to have him give himself a bottle.

Please share yoru ideas!

I plan on changing diapers on the floor instead of the changing table.

Just FYI, I was not able to get down and up off the floor until about Day 5. Hoping your hubby is planning on taking some time off those first crucial days?

My dr also said no lifting anything over 10 lbs for 2 weeks. My kid is 5 yrs old tho and weighs 50 lbs; I stopped lifting him ages ago!

:faint: Uh oh. I guess I was thinking that by day 3 or 4 I would be good to watch the kids by myself-

with the exception of getting them in/out of cribs. They are both in cribs!!!!

I absolutely cannot tall my in-laws that I am having this surgery. But they are my only source of help, other than my hubby. Maybe I can get away with just telling them that I am having a minor "female trouble" procedure and that would buy me a few days of them watching the kiddos... then my hubby could take off work for a few more after that...

Please don't judge me for keeping this a secret from family. It's so very complicated, but I should mention that my in-laws are wonderful people. I am just a really private & self-conscious person who doesn't want my gossiping/opinionated MIL watching & commenting on what I eat for the rest of my life. :hungry:

Sounds like a reasonable explanation for them to me.

You need to realize at least for awhile if she sees you eat at all she will be asking questions, because your eating WILL change. You will be restricted to liquids, then to mushies for several weeks following. Then it will be a matter of trial and error. Keep this in mind if you are going to be in their company for say Easter Dinner....

Once you have healed, and begin fills, you will go back to liquids following the fill for a day to 3 days depending on your Dr. And you will have to carefully and cautiously add foods to your diet, seeing how each reacts. It is not a hard thing to do for me, but I think keeping it from my family (which I understand WHY you are doing) would have made it really difficult.

Now when we go out with family or friends (mine ALL know!) I order a meal with the rest of the group, and I eat, I just eat much slower. Actually sitting my fork down and waiting between bites. In the end I am full about the same time they are, but I have over 3/4 of my meal left to take home. This could raise some eyebrows if no one knows.

So it might be time now to start talking about the new diet you are going to start---be proactive at reducing their comments as opposed to being reactive when it is happening. Something about the hormone fluctuation, the anesthtic, something(!) makes many people emotional following the surgery...and you don't need to be caught off guard trying to cover your tracks--and getting upset by it. Start taking walks with the kids, and if you are around them now, don't eat---make your excuses NOW!!! Then feign whatever female issue you have in mind (my sister in law explained her band as a D&C), and use it to maybe help your diet along....

If they see you start the changes now---the exercise, the eating changes, they won't try to connect them to the sudden female surgery.

I feel like I should be singing "I've got a secret!!!"

Kat

I totally agree with setting the stage before surgery. I'm not telling ANYONE but my husband. So, since my kids and their families often come for Sunday dinner, I told them that after our anniversary (which happens to be the day before my surgery) I am going on a liquid diet for "several weeks." They just think it's another one of my weight loss attempts (of which they are all very supportive but also very sweet about it).

I am worried about Easter, too. I'll still be on mushies then and we always have our traditional ham, au gratin potatoes, etc. at our house. Not sure how to handle that but I'll figure it out by then.

I've already solicited DH's help with some dinner parties that are coming up during my liquid phase--he has agreed to go alone because I'm feeling "under the weather." That will work fine, I think.

It seems to me the liquid/mushy stages will be the most difficult. I'm not worried about just being able to eat small amounts slowly. After all, I'm always on some kind of "eating plan." Besides, few people really notice what someone else is or isn't eating as long as they have their plates full and are enjoying THEIR food!

Good luck to all!

:faint: Uh oh. I guess I was thinking that by day 3 or 4 I would be good to watch the kids by myself-

with the exception of getting them in/out of cribs. They are both in cribs!!!!

I absolutely cannot tall my in-laws that I am having this surgery. But they are my only source of help, other than my hubby. Maybe I can get away with just telling them that I am having a minor "female trouble" procedure and that would buy me a few days of them watching the kiddos... then my hubby could take off work for a few more after that...

Wise decision not to tell others about the surgery. I told too many people and am regretting it.

I don't have kids, but I do have a 15 lb. geriatric cat who requires a lot of care. He can no longer jump up on the furniture by himself, so I'm constantly helping him in and out of bed or up and down off the sofa. It was very, very rough doing that for the first week. Just bending down to get him was excruciating. You are definitely going to need more help with infants/toddlers. Good luck.

Thanks to everyone for the great advice. My husband has agreed to be on infant lifting duty for me which will help a lot. Plus, I will keep her at daycare the week I am home so we will just have to cover the evenings.

By the way in reference to the other topic I wouldn't feel bad about keeping the surgery to yourself its a very personal decision! I am also not telling anyone but my husband but all my family is out of state so it makes it much easier to keep a secret. Good luck to you!

I'm glad to hear you're going to get more help. If you feel up to it you can always call off the extra help!

I kept the surgery from most people I know as well. Only my parents and my husband know (and a couple of irrelevant people DH told before I told him to be quiet!). My siblings know I got surgery but they don't know what kind.

I have to stay in contact with my eccentric former mother-in-law because of my son. I had to tell her I was having surgery so she would help me with the kiddo, but I didn't want to tell her what kind. She actually had the nerve to tell me she was "insulted" that I won't tell her what kind of surgery I had. Well too friggin bad!!

Thanks, everyone, for your advice & support! I have really thought about it and...

I started covering the bases today... I am doing lab work and psy. consult tomorow, so the inlaws will have the kdis all day. My MIL asked hubby what kind of doc I was seeing all the way across town (I knew she would ask!) and, upon my instructions, he told her it was "female issues" and she left it at that. I plan on saying I have ovarian cysts- did some research, and they are common and almost always not life-threatening, but can be bothersome and sometimes have to be removed laproscopically.

As far as future meals together, I am planning on saying that I am on a serious diet- having the cysts scared me because they were not detecable during a normal exam!... blah blah blah.

I would like to just add real quick that I am not a big-fat-liar in other areas of my life. But this is just one area where I am going to lie my fat ass off!

I have a 15 month old and was just banded. My doc told me that ideally, I shouldn't lift anything over 10 lbs for a couple of weeks, but knew that it probably wasn't realistic, so told me to "do what you have to do, just be careful the first few days"

I had my husband with me to carry her in the airport and put her in the car seat for the first day or so, she sat on my lap the entire way home on the plane. She pushed on my stitches/abdomen a few times, but I nothing I couldn't tollerate. After a day or so, I was able to care for her. I'd use my legs to lift her and kept her on my hip.Or, I'd slide her to my lap if I was sitting, then would stand up from there. I did change diapers on the floor, but it is kind of hard to get up off the floor those first couple of days. Just change baby near the bed or something so you can us it for support to help you stand up. Changing baby on the bed might even be your best bet.

I was a quick healer though, by day 2 I felt pretty good. I had surgery on a Thursday and was back to work the following Monday.