I'm a 40 year old mans and am 300 lbs with a 42 bmi. I have always been above average in size - just not this big.

So what are my fears?

1. I fear the loss of eating what I want in large quantities. I fear the loss of comfort through food.

2. Only my wife knows. I fear that my family will think in nuts: "you're not that big , just exercise and diet". I fear that I might agree with them - out of fear.

3. I fear being different -a freak. What will dinner and drinks be like with our friends? I like to have a few too many drinks every once in a while.

4. I fear always having to think about this "disability" every meal time. Will it ever feel second nature?

Anyone have any thoughts on my fears ? Are yours similar? Should I be totally without fear before I actually go through with it?

I am three and half weeks post op and I also had those "concerns". I wouldn't call them fears, but just concerns. I love to cook. To me that is how I show my love to my family. I also enjoyed my wine, pretty much on a daily basis. (And my coffee)!. But my love for myself and my health was greater than those. I still cook, just can't eat what I have prepared. I have my own little meals. And yes, I have gone off wine and coffee cold turkey. Do I look at my wine rack longingly? Yes.....but I also look at the scale with greater admiration! Dinner and drinks,.....and everything for that matter, will change. It has to....I couldn't keep drinking and eating that way if I wanted to be healthy. Don't worry, once you have the surgery, you just won't have any room for all that food!

it's fairly simple. Do you want to live an extra 10-15 years, or deal with your food issues?