Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Haven't told anyone yet



Recommended Posts

So i have gone for 5 of my 6 visits so far and am just weeks away from my final visit. I haven't told any family and friends about me doing the lap band yet. For two reasons:

1. in case my insurance denies me, i don't want to have to explain it

2. in all honesty it just doesn't seem like anything i feel i want to share.

I dont think anyone will truly understand the struggles I've had, and then there is always the ones that want to judge....I don't have the patience for those people at all.

how did it go for some of you folks?

just curious.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have told some people. I don't share with anyone other than here and with my husband how much I have lost. I don't need people saying, Arlene was a real fat f**k. That is what I always called myself.

Good for you doing this. It is the best thing I have done for me and my health.

Good luck.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

For me, it was a gradual "coming out" process.

When I first decided to get the band, the only people I told were my kids, my parents, and my brother. I knew they'd support me without judgement- plus I needed help with my kids after surgery so I had to be honest.

Originally I was terrified to tell anyone else. I kept thinking "what if I fail?" I didn't want to be a failure (again) while the world watched. It would've been too humiliating. Plus, I didn't want to deal with being judged.

As time went on and I started losing, I slowly started telling more people. Somewhere around the 100 pound loss mark I started telling pretty much anyone who asked. Shockingly, the majority of people were very supportive and encouraging. The few he did make the stereotypical "easy way out" comment I just set straight- counting every calorie that goes into my mouth and pushing myself to exercise is anything but easy. I worked for every pound I lost.

These days, I'm very open and honest about it. I hope that by sharing my story, maybe I can help teach others about it and start to help fight against the stereotypes.

At the end of the day, you have to do whatever is most comfortable for you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Different story here i told my boss because needed time off but when I told my brother he said why bother so no support there my wife been real supportive at first she did not think i would have gone all the way but she was surprised when i quit smoking and still lost more weight. now that i am banded i am looking for a six month 100 pound lost she wants to renew our vows in July of next year and i want to look the best i can for her

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I only told my bf sister and a friend at work. Plus all of the people on here. I told my boss i was having a hernia repair. No one at work knows. I dont like sharing my business with many.people.

There have been some questions at work like you lost weight what r u doing and i say exercise like crazy and eating right. That is the truth.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm usually totally open and tell everyone everything, but this I didn't want to tell... I told a few of my closest friends, but not many.

There are a few reasons...

Mostly I think I'm just sick of talking about my weight, and I REALLY didn't want to give anyone permission to randomly start talking to me about it.

Every person I have told has had a million questions, and I don't have the energy to educate the world. It's exhausting.

Part of why I'm fat is that I don't want people to look at me, I want to be invisible. In the past when I've lost weight, I've freaked out as I got thinner. And this time I wasn't sure how fast or slow it would work, so I didn't want people looking at me, wondering.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was excited to tell my family and my husband was very encouraging but since almost 70lbs gone I am beginning to see jealousy and ppl talking about How small are you going to get, which makes me not talk about my WLS to orhers

Sent from my iPhone using LapBandTalk

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

So i have gone for 5 of my 6 visits so far and am just weeks away from my final visit. I haven't told any family and friends about me doing the lap band yet. For two reasons:

1. in case my insurance denies me, i don't want to have to explain it

2. in all honesty it just doesn't seem like anything i feel i want to share.

I dont think anyone will truly understand the struggles I've had, and then there is always the ones that want to judge....I don't have the patience for those people at all.

how did it go for some of you folks?

just curious.

Braz.... i wish i would not have told people. I told my husband and kids of course.... but i wish i would have kept my mouth shut to everyone else.

Especially the b*****s (aka: ex co-workers). I told two and swore them to secrecy, and it was good until i started losing weight and then the Green headed monster showed. They go to jealous of my weight loss.... One of the guys at work said... Wow chris you look great, good job losing. One of them went right behind me and said to him... she's only losing because she has the LB doing all the work for her... He came back and said... Chris, did you have LB? I was so angry.. He said i thought you were watching what you ate and working out.... I said i am... walked away.

So if you want to keep it a secret.... tell no one... not even our BFF.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My top almost hit the roof last week when my mother casually mentioned to me she told one of our far cousins I had lap band. I could count on my right hand the people I told (besides my hubby, mom, ONE sister, father and daughter) and I would like to keep it that way. Although I DO regret telling the few others and in one of my posts I go into detail what happened to me with the clerk at my neighborhood pharmacy when she saw me for the first time after LB. maybe in the future will change the way I think and feel about sharing my story with others, but for now I'm keeping it hush, hush..... I just hope my mom can too.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

just want to say thank you to all of you for your responses. I greatly appreciate it. I think at work im gonna just take a few days vacation for when i get approved. Then I'll just go from there.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've told everyone about it. Family, co-workers, friends, even some of my customers. I figure if they judge me behind my back then it only affects them. I'm the one getting healthier and rocking smaller sizes so they can take it or leave it. I'm pretty much that way about everything though... What you see is what you get and if you don't like it, See Ya! Lol All of the 'real' people in your life will just add to your support system and cheerleading team and you don't have to lie to explain your food choices or portion sizes. I'll take that!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I never told anyone, except close family members....and now that I have been at my optimal weight for a while now...no one asks anymore, everyone has gotten used to it, and takes it for granted this is who I am....done...time to move on to something else in the office to talk about.

I even had some people tell me they cannot remember me ever being fat!! Now that's a compliment I will accept gladly.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Theweightisover2024🙌💪

      Question for anyone, how did you get your mind right before surgery? Like as far as eating better foods and just doing better in general? I'm having a really hard time with this. Any help is appreciated 🙏❤️
      · 2 replies
      1. NickelChip

        I had about 6 months between deciding to do surgery and getting scheduled. I came across the book The Pound of Cure by Dr. Matthew Weiner, a bariatric surgeon in Arizona, and started to implement some of the changes he recommended (and lost 13 lbs in the process without ever feeling deprived). The book is very simple, and the focus is on whole, plant based foods, but within reason. It's not an all or nothing approach, or going vegan or something, but focuses on improvement and aiming for getting it right 80-90% of the time. His suggestions are divided into 12 sections that you can tackle over time, perhaps one per month for a year if a person is just trying to improve nutrition and build good habits. They range from things like cutting out artificial sweetener or eating more beans to eating a pound of vegetables per day. I found it really effective pre-surgery and it's an eating style I will be working to get back to as I am further out from surgery and have more capacity. Small changes you can sustain will do the most for building good habits for life.

      2. Theweightisover2024🙌💪

        That sounds awesome. I'll have to check that out thanks!

    • BeanitoDiego

      I've hit a stall 9 months out. I'm not worried, though. My fitness levels continue to improve and I have nearly accomplished my pre-surgery goal of learning to scuba dive! One dive left to complete to get my PADI card 🐠
      I was able to go for a 10K/6mile hike in the mountains two days ago just for the fun of it. In the before days, I might have attempted this, but it would have taken me 7 or 8 hours to complete and I would have been exhausted and in pain for the next two days. Taking my time with breaks for snacks and water, I was finished with my wee jaunt in only 4 hours 😎 and really got to enjoy photographing some insects, fungi, and turtles.
      Just for fun last week, I ran two 5Ks in two days, something I would have never done in the past! Next goal is a 10K before the end of this month.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Teriesa

      Hi everyone, I wrote back in May about having no strength. I still get totally exhausted just walking from room to room, it’s so bad I’m using a walker with wheels of all things. I had the gastric sleeve Jan. 24th. I’m doing exactly what the programs says, except protein shakes. I have different meats and protein bars daily, including vitamins daily. I do drink my fluids as well.  I go in for IV hydration 4 days a week and feel ok just til evening.  So far as of Jan 1st I’ve dropped 76 lbs. I just want to enjoy the weight lose. Any suggestions or has anyone else gone thru this??  Doctor says just increase calorie intake, still the same. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Stone Art By SKL

      Decorative Wall Cladding & Panels | Stone Art By SKL
      Elevate your space with Stone Art By SKL's decorative wall claddings & panels. Explore premium designs for timeless elegance.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Clueless_girl

      Losing my hair in clumps and still dealing with "stomach" issues from gallbladder removal surgery. On the positive side I'm doing better about meeting protein and water goals and taking my vitamins, so yay? 🤷‍♀️
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×