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The person in the mirror

I had my third fill last evening. While the NP was documenting in my chart, I noticed the photo she had taken 2 weeks before my surgery and I asked to see it more closely.

I studied it. Even though the top and slacks I'm wearing in the photo are long gone because they were too big, I don't see a difference in myself. She was surprised, "Are you kidding? You don't look anything like this anymore!" was her response. My husband was with me and said the same thing.

It's not that I look in the mirror and think, "Wow, look at that fat woman." It's that I look and see me. The same me. I don't see the difference.

Do you see yourself getting thinner when you look in the mirror?

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I know exactly what you mean.

A few years ago I lost 50lbs with a slimming club and although I felt better I too could not see much difference..........until I put all of the weight back on and saw a pic of myself 50lbs lighter! What I would do to be that size again! I looked fantastic but at the time I stil felt huge and frumpy.

Have you got some before and after pics you could put side by side as this should help you to compare.

You are doing a fantastic job by the way!

X katie

The mirror plays tricks on us... that is why anorexic people still see themselves as fat..

and why I don't see the fat when I look in the mirror... and why also I end up waking up one day to find myself back at the same weight over and over again!

I don't see my weight loss either. In fact I made a before/current picture to post on the boards and once I looked at it I threw it away. I've done the superimposed image and I SEE how much I've lost by placing myself now and in June over each other and dimming the current one but when I just see a picture... nada... and I try to avoid the mirrors or, like Barb, I'll cry.

The mirror plays tricks on us... that is why anorexic people still see themselves as fat..
That's our brains doing that, not the mirror. :)

When I look in the mirror, I do not see a "big picture" difference, but I notice smaller differences. My collar bones are sticking out, my stomach is droopy, fat rolls are disappearing. But overall when I look in the mirror now at the whole enchilada, I don't see a distinguishable different from pre-op.

However, simetimes when I see a picture of me now, I'm like - That must just be a really flattering picture because there's no way I actually look like that, I'm way too fat to look like that! (Not that I'm skinny by any means, but it's relativity...)

I was not fat my entire life. For most of my life I was very athletic and fit. And when I dream, I'm "regular" me. And oddly enough, even at my highest weight, when I put an outfit on, the mental image I'd have was thin me in that outfit. So seeing the harsh reality of what I had become had a very potent sting known as "reality check".

I know there's a difference, because people who have no idea I had the surgery, that I haven't seen since I had it, are speechless. Everyone is noticing, even our tax preparer that I only see once a year. And I know that if I was someone who knew me, and had seen me lose ~130 lbs, I'D see a big difference in me... but I don't now. The mental fat block is still there!

I have the mental fat block too! I see the subtle things but not the overall picture and people think I am nuts to not see it all.

I have lost a 14 y.o. girl (essentially) and I can mentally understand that - but my brain does not process the image that should go along with it.

Oh, therapy...here I come!!!

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