Good evening my friends! When you had RNY did you ever tell yourself "if I lose this weight I will never let myself gain it back again"? Well, I sure did. I had RNY in June of 2008 and went from 328 lbs. to 175 lbs. I felt positively svelt and could do all the things I could never do heavy. I continued on and did very well until my son passed away suddenly at the age of 27. That was in December 2010. He had a brain tumor in 2001 near his pituitary and due to the trauma to the gland, he would be on testerone injections, thyroid meds, DDAVP (Desmopressin for Diabetes Insipidus) and an assorted other types of pills to do for him what the pituitary couldn't. One of those drugs was Prednisone. He had been on them for nearly 10 years to help provide the cortisol his adrenal gland no longer did.

My son literally dropped dead outside his apartment on Friday, December 17, 2010. I had just hung up with him and I said "I love you Brandon" and he said "not as much" and I said "whatever". We found out he had passed on Saturday afternoon when he didn't meet me for Christmas shopping. Long story to say that the prednisone had caused severe liver damage and the liver had severe cirrhosis. The cause of death: Arythmia caused by Non-Alcoholic Fatty Liver Disease.

After Brandon died, I can't explain it other than I felt like I was being trivial to count carbs and exercise when he would never be able to do those things. I was pretty strong throughout the arrangements and the weeks to come. The only way you could really tell I wasn't dealing well is when my weight started spiraling out of control.

Fast forward to September 2012. I was 246 lbs. which was a definite oppositie of "I will NEVER gain it back again". I felt fat and bloated. I was sad and felt like I had (once again) let myself go. I decided I had to do something so I attended the Obesity Help Conference here in Atlanta. That was the motivation I needed to get back on the wagon and get the regained weight gone. I started a program called Back on Track through the Bariatric Resource Center and I am literally back to basics. Protein, protein, protein.....watching those carbs.....starting to move more.....drink water.....log my food on My Fitness Pal.

If you have regained and want to get back on the loser's train, this groups for YOU! We can discuss our ups and downs (quite literally), our strategies, our plans and lessons learned. Monday was my weigh in day and I am at 225.2 which is still about 50 lbs. to get back to where I got down to but I'm on the journey. Come join me and we can do this together!!!

Ladies, I am still battling and some days I feel victorious but others not so much. I know the thing to do is to go back to basics....limiting carbs, eating 3 times a day with no Snacks, no drinking when eating, Vitamins and walking at least. I wish there was a magic bullet. I wish the weight I gained would just fall off but reality has set in and I know it won't.

One thing I do know is that I have an eating disorder. I always looked at an eating disorder was when people don't eat (Anorexia) or eat and purge (Bulemia). I have come to realize that I am a food addict, a compulsive over eater. I don't know how to deal with emotions except to stuff them down. I am working to get a grip on this as I believe that is my only hope to ever attain and maintain a "normal" weight.

I just want to be healthy. I have to fly on business 3 round trips in the next 4 weeks and I'm already freaking out that the seat belt won't fit around my 265 lb. belly. I was totally humiliated once by a flight attendant who made it crystal clear to everyone with in 4 rows of me front and back that I needed an extender. That was the final straw to have me get everything in order for gastric bypass.

I have got to learn how to deal with this addiction. How to live with emotions and not be controlled by them. How to handle people who hurt my feelings without eating.

@@joyfulinga, I honestly feel like you're me! Lol I'm pre op. I had to ask for a seat belt extender. I was mortified, particularly because my husband was there. Smh I'm awaiting my last appointment before submitting to insurance. Thank you for sharing. It helps me, even before surgery. God bless you!

Dawnie_doo

I'm six years & +30 lbs post op. Incredibly frustrated and disappointed in myself. I watch what I eat and exercise daily but find my thoughts revolve around food and I don't get that 'full' feeling I once did. I've considered a revision of some kind but it's embarrassing to admit I failed... Again.

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Oh Phaetondreams, I year you girl! It is so hard and I often feel like a failure myself. What kind of food plan do you try to follow?

I've been just counting calories, at the recommendation of the nutritionist where my surgery was done, but that's not been successful. I've tried the pouch test and lost weight but never felt full. Just this week I started Protein Drinks as opposed to three meals per day and I'm only snacking 2 times on high Protein foods. Fingers crossed.

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Phaeton dreams, I just sent you a message on here. Check it out.

I do know how you are feeling. I have lost my dad and beloved father-in-law and step mom all within the last 4 years. My weight started to come back in 2014 after a car accident crushed my ankle and totally obliviated my heel. I could n't do much of anything for 12 weeks but sit on my but and watch life goo by. But I did manage to eat, not badly, but not like I should have. The with all the pain in my abscessed tooth and the pain in my ankle I was using ibuprofen for the pain and developed an ulcer in the part of my stomach no longer in use. After 6 units of blood and a week in the hospital I felt like a failure. The weight just seemed to come back on I want eating every night while in bed, not sleeping, diarrhea constantly and just feeling like crap. My highest weight was 284.5 in 1999, I had a RNY in August 1999. I came home miserable! In pain I never had feet before, wondering what I did to my self. But That all passed. I was named TOPS Queen for 2000 for the state of Michigan. Went on tour and talked to many chapters about my journey. I was truly happy for once in my life, truly happy. Things were going great, I went to college got a job I loved and the after 4.5 years was let go with no more than a thank you mam'm I was crushed. I really don't know when the weight came back. Here it is June of June2016 a di am at 207#!! I need help getting back on track. I did a pouch restart forte days but think I need to do it longer. I joined back to my TOPS weight loss group,against my better judgement. I have gained every week since I joined.but feels really good friend needs me there so I stay. I need help getting on the right track! I could use all the help you can offer. Help needed end in Michigan

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