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I'm still pre-op and have only told 1 friend and 1 family member so far. My friend, who is overweight and has severe diabetes, continues to try talking me out of it.

I've stopped bringing it up and he may think he talked me out of it. Not sure if ill ever bring it up again or admit to it later.... I'll just tell him I took his advice with dieting and exercise and it worked!

When your friend starts in with trying to talk you OUT of it.....turn it around and start pressuring HER to join you, y'all can be "sleeve buddies" Put HER on the defensive rather than letting HER put you on the spot!!! LoL

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So, how do you respond to the following?

"You could lose this weight if you really wanted to...you just need to have more discipline, not surgery!" You just need more discipline to stop wearing those hideous shirts... Ass.

"You shouldn't mess with what God gave you - he gave you a big stomach - that's what you should keep!" Pretty sure this 49" waist size didn't come out of my mom's va jay jay...

"It's all just a fad....hopefully, you'll 'come to your senses' before the surgery!" You're an idiot. Do you even read? Oh, you've got a little drool right there...

"Why would you want to do that - you could just go to Weight Watchers and get the same results!?!"

You ever been to a Weight Watcher's meeting? It's like a freaking class reunion! Every few years all the same people are back to try again because this time it's going to be different.

I've had some strange comments thrown at me in the last few weeks - I need some decent responses to shut these naysayers down!!!

**reposted from "Deal with what God Gave You and Other..."

I am pretty sure that your 49" waist did not come from your mama's va jay jay! OUCH!!!

I've lost 50 pounds three different times, two of them with WW. Like any "DIET" as soon as you get back to real life and not counting points, drinking Medifast shakes or popping Phen Fen......it's going to come back, strong, hard and fast!!! Every single stinkin' time!!! A vicious cycle.

Dropping 15, 20 or 25 pounds is as easy as pie....it isn't the losing weight that is usually the problem, it's keeping it off. We all "get it" but many others, even other FAT people, don't get it, it's called denial.

I know, we don't like the "F" word, but it is what it is. We didn't go under the knife because we were 'hefty' or 'big boned' - did we??!!!! Not me, I was fat, with a capital F.

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Sounds to me like a good ol' fashioned "Kiss my a$$" is in order! I'm just sayin' :)

I guess I was just completely lucky because I have told everybody...family, friends, my volunteer group, my (mostly young & skinny) classmates, put it on FB, etc. I have not heard one single negative comment from anybody, and I have received a TON of support & loving encouragement. Maybe there have been some negative comments behind my back, but I neither know nor care about that. If there HAD been anything negative directed to my face, I was prepared to do exactly as NtvTxn suggests...including following it up with a "Bless your heart". I'm so sorry you're having to deal with mean sucky people.

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I guess I was just completely lucky because I have told everybody...family, friends, my volunteer group, my (mostly young & skinny) classmates, put it on FB, etc. I have not heard one single negative comment from anybody, and I have received a TON of support & loving encouragement. Maybe there have been some negative comments behind my back, but I neither know nor care about that. If there HAD been anything negative directed to my face, I was prepared to do exactly as NtvTxn suggests...including following it up with a "Bless your heart". I'm so sorry you're having to deal with mean sucky people.

Yay, someone who thinks like I do, even down to the 'Bless your heart' :) I love it. Like you, I received so much support, and believe it or not, my THIN friends and elderly relatives were the most supportive!!! I have a few family members that I suspect disapprove, but they haven't said anything, one has said NOTHING. I've lost 85 lbs and she has never acknowledged it! Isn't that weird??!!! My dad, my mother in law and my husband's 90 yr old great aunt have been wonderful. The two women are SOOOOO glad that I did this before my knees got bad and before I got too old. Lovely women!! Anyway, I've been lucky, I haven't told everyone, but I told quite a few. Only one I wish I hadn't....I know she's a gossip. Oh well.....no repercussions that I KNOW of!! LoL Congrats to you......good luck!

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I've decided to not share this with anyone. This journey is NOT easy and I honestly believe those who think that are uneducated about the whole process and may never been in our situations.

I figure no one asked me how I got this way it's not their business how I became healthier!

Think of this as a tool. Keep a ile in your face and know that we are all here to support you!!

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One of the things you may have to realize is that people don't want you looking better than them...they don't understand what bigger people go through. I am 50, I have high blood pressure, my joints hurt a lot, and my bmi is 48. I am only 5 foot 2 and my weight is 270. I am looking foreward to living like a normal person.

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One of the things you may have to realize is that people don't want you looking better than them...they don't understand what bigger people go through. I am 50' date=' I have high blood pressure, my joints hurt a lot, and my bmi is 48. I am only 5 foot 2 and my weight is 270. I am looking foreward to living like a normal person.[/quote']

I totally agree. I was in a conservation with two "slim" ladies and the subject was fashion. I had mentioned one day I will be getting into a designer's outfit and honey, the look of disbelief on their faces. It gave me more motivation to prepare for my surgery. Currently, I'm learning how to lift weights.

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I work in a recovery room and we do lots of Bariatric procedures. Last year I mentioned I was thinking about VSG and I couldn't believe all the negativity. "You don't need anything that drastic" "Don't mutilate yourself" etc...Then they started talking about all the different hospital employees who had the surgery and how they weren't fat enough for it and they shouldn't have done it. Well I learned to shut my mouth real quick. I dropped my insurance so I was able to use my husbands insurance. I saw my surgeon in January, has the surgery in April. My husband, 3 children (14, 20 & 22), my brother and his wife are the only people I told. When asked I tell them everything I'm doing..water, Protein, calorie restriction. Then I change the subject!

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I feel lucky that my family and close freinds are supportive! A couple of my sisters tell me if it goes well for me they are going to look into it. For me, it's the fringe people I won't tell until after the surgery!

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I have told a few co workers, friends and family. I had a mixed bag of responses. I got the few that were supportive.. The few that put a smile on their faces and said "well I guess it's your decision" Then I had a quite a few that had negative feedback and comments like your taking the easy way out, you need to try harder with diet and exercise, you need to stop giving up.. And my all time favorite I knew you were fat enough to need to exercise but I didn't think you were fat enough to have that surgery.

Fr the ones that asked questions I answered them, perhaps to plant that seed and maybe change their lives for the better. And for the ones that gave negativity I say screw them I don't need them in my life anyway. Some are co-workers so I have to deal with them but I will no longer talk to them about anything other than work.

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After talking to my dad and sister and getting negative responses, I have decided not to tell them when I have my surgery. I don't want to hear any of their negative words, so I just won't tell them until I am home from the hospital and losing weight. As far as my dad's significant other is concerned, I have decided that as I lose the weight and can no longer fit into my clothes, I am going to send them to her while get new skinny ones.

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I have decided to keep it quiet until after the surgery. I think even well meaning people can be a little mean. what is funny to me, is that over the past few months I have actually found out that a few people I've known for a while have had the surgery several years ago. They are incredibly healthy, happy people. It has come up in conversation naturally and each time I feel reassured that it's a great option. I have felt like it was a sign. :)

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I have decided to keep it quiet until after the surgery. I think even well meaning people can be a little mean. what is funny to me' date=' is that over the past few months I have actually found out that a few people I've known for a while have had the surgery several years ago. They are incredibly healthy, happy people. It has come up in conversation naturally and each time I feel reassured that it's a great option. I have felt like it was a sign. :)[/quote']

I know that's right.

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