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Ideas for what to tell people?



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I have only told a few close people. Once it's done and I'm losing weight if I still decide to keep it to myself I'm not sure. Guess I will cross that bridge when I get to it. I have heard negative comments from several people at work about WLS before I even began my journey, but they have their opinion and I have mine. If they have something to say, bring it on. Lol

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Its a personal choice but I find it funny that I hear a lot of people complaining about the bad stigma wls has, however the same people that are having it done are keeping it a secret. How do we expect society to accept it if we ourselves are embarrassed or ashamed of it?

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It's just so much easier to tell the truth - plus, you might just really help someone who really needs to talk with someone who's been through it themselves.

Yesterday I met a patient who is really obese, and her hip is wearing out quickly and she's only 48 years old. So even though I just met her And I'm her doctor, I told her about my experience, and now she's going to see my surgeon.

I feel that I can use my experience to help people.

When you tell others, they are almost always supportive. I don't worry too much what people think about me as long as they keep it to themselves :)

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It's like sharing the consistency of your bowel movements. THEY DONT NEED TO KNOW!

If I get pressed with, "How did you lose all the weight?" I've already decided to say, "I watch what I eat, get more exercise, rest more.... Just learning to be more selfish and focus on what I need and not putting my needs on the back burner anymore. It's working because I found THE BEST appetite suppressant and it is working with no drug interaction or side-effects! And, it's 5-year success rate is higher than any other appetite suppressant on the market!" Then, just walk... away... And let it marinade in their heads awhile.

THEN, when they say they want the name of the product, I will tell them it was VS. and, I will immediately say, "People taking pills to help them lose weight are not defined by that pill. And, I am not defined by VS, either. It's just a tool, and one that actually works."

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Why lie and who cares what people say is my opinion <img src='http://www.bariatricpal.com/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.png' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':)' />

They don't pay my bills or live in my body to judge me or my decisions to help me be healthiest I can be. Maybe by being upfront it may help others make this life changing decision that someone at home is not supporting them on....I think when people judge (anything) its because they don't understand and its easier to cut someone down.

Yes ! Tell the truth

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I told mine I was back on Weight Watchers & hitting the gym again. I told them 'female' surgery - and they let it go for the most part.

I would advise anyone to keep it private. Once you tell someone - there's no taking it back & people can be mean' date=' intentionally and unintentionally.

Do what is best for you![/quote']

Ain't that the truth!

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I told my coworkers who are ALL in healthcare that I had a hernia repair that why I was out of work and as to why I'm Loosing weight I am song Portion Control and exercise which is ALL true. If your not comfortable sharing your WLS then don't its no ones business but yours and your not at work for to tell your personal business anyway.

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Don't be ashamed or scared- Tell the truth.

Lying is toxic, stressful, and puts a load on our shoulders. You don't owe them an explanation, but you also can choose to not lie. You can say "I had surgery" or some type of beginning of the truth, or you can tell really inquisitive people that you're not comfortable talking about it yet. When you're ready... tell the truth!

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Its a personal choice but I find it funny that I hear a lot of people complaining about the bad stigma wls has, however the same people that are having it done are keeping it a secret. How do we expect society to accept it if we ourselves are embarrassed or ashamed of it?

What makes you think that people who keep their private lives private are embarrassed or ashamed? Did the thought ever occur to you for one second that sometimes people just don't need to share every last detail of their life with the whole world? Be it ANY medical or other personal aspect of their lives. it's as simple as privacy

I would suggest before you start labeling and name calling you think about your words.

How irresponsible can you be?

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What makes you think that people who keep their private lives private are embarrassed or ashamed? Did the thought ever occur to you for one second that sometimes people just don't need to share every last detail of their life with the whole world? Be it ANY medical or other personal aspect of their lives. it's as simple as privacy

I would suggest before you start labeling and name calling you think about your words.

How irresponsible can you be?

Newat52 from your response one is left to assume this really strikes a cord with you. I didn't see any name calling or labeling - she/he seemed to just be making an observation.

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Newat52, Please point out where I called anyone a name???? My post was so non specific to any one person! It wasn't even directed at anyone person. Also, please explain to me how in the world can I be considered IRRESPONSIBLE for wanting weight loss surgery to be accepted by the public???? You may not agree with me which is fine, I don't care, but to say that I am name calling and irresponsible is just not right.

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I also hate when people imply that we are somehow ashamed or embarrassed about surgery because we don't shout it out to the world or tell everyone who ask. I wonder how many people have considered the fact that they themselves might not be open to sharing other parts of their lives. For example: the number of people they've slept with, how much money they make, how much they spend shopping, how much debt, financial/marital issues, etc. You may be open about your surgery but do you feel comfortable sharing other aspects of your life that may be intrusive to your privacy? I am not ashamed of my surgery and it's been one of the best decisions I've ever made in my life but it's not my job to divulge every aspect of my life. I do not owe anyone an explanation and I highly doubt that anyone in life could ever claim to be "truthful" 100% of the time. If you want to tell everyone who ask, then do so but stop trying to shame others into doing things the way YOU would.

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I stand by my post and refuse to argue on this forum. however I will revise it to say what everyone wants to hear because if you don't write what everyone wants to hear your a horrible irresponsible person (this is why I only have posted like 20 some times). Everyone is right, keep a secret for the rest of your life. Good idea!

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I'm not arguing with anyone but I did propose (define: to engage in talk or discussion) a question to those who believe that we should be "truthful" and "honest". Would those who feel open about discussing their surgery, also be open to discussing the number of people they've slept with, how much money they make, how much they spend shopping, how much debt, financial/marital issues, sexual abuse, STDs, etc?

It's not about keeping a "secret" for the rest of your life but merely about respecting someones decision to doing whats right for them and if that means taking their surgery to the grave, then fine. Neither decision is more right than the next. A lot of people come to forums like these so that they can share their journey and be open. VSG is not my life and I hardly ever think about but I didn't sign up to be the spokes person for this surgery.

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Tell the truth(.) Why wouldn't you? If anyone ask i tell I start from the beginning with my lap band to now. I'm not embarrassed however after first I was but then I said bump it! I'm proud of my decision to get control over my health and I definitely wasnt heavy eater or anything like that I just couldn't get the weight off me.

You have to personally find your BUMP it thought and go with it.

I do think people are embarrassed and that's why they don't tell the truth. You wouldn't hide showing up with a baby when you never appeared pregnant its all a blessing. You telling someone like you can help them because honestly only people who are bigger ask me a skinny person will act like they don't notice.

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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