Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Closet Eater....and I'm coming out!



Recommended Posts

Unfortunately this is an urban myth For the first few months' date=' you won't be hungry at all. Then slowly but surely you do start to feel hungry. I'm not talking about head hunger, but you will really know when you need to eat.[/quote']

Thank you for this statement John.

Hunger is real. For that matter so is "head hunger" As you advance further out these things will come into play more. It's just a fact and something that needs to be looked at and addressed. As early as possible and it will be something that most of us will have to continue to work on in the months and years to come.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm 4 months out' date=' and doing pretty well in general. But I just had a visit from the demon from hell......the closet eater inner self! I have the house to myself, and for some reason, as soon as I realized it, the thing that came to my mind was "I wonder what I can eat?" [/quote']

Ha! Don't I know this feeling I am an undercover eater too. At 5 months its rearing its ugly head a little more. I am trying not to eat by myself and also telling my husband when it does happen so I can feel like its more in the open and I am not hiding like I used too.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Um your scaring me . I thought your not supposed to be hungry because they take out the part of the stomach that triggers the hunger But i havent had the surgery and am totally a novice . i am waiting for a date hopefuly in May. The only advice I can offer is look at how much weight you have lost in such a short time. I pray I can come close. Thats an awesome acomplishment!! You should be so proud of yourself. So when that demon shows his ugly head' date=' go look at yourself in the mirror . Look at what you did. Look at your hard work , and your looking good . Dont let it take that away from you. Good luck dont give your demon life , ignore him!!![/quote']

I had it a week ago and still feel hunger but you got to start realizing the differance between real hunger and head hunger. The surgery is just a tool and we got to learn how to use it

Sent from my iPhone using VST

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Um your scaring me . I thought your not supposed to be hungry because they take out the part of the stomach that triggers the hunger But i havent had the surgery and am totally a novice . i am waiting for a date hopefuly in May. The only advice I can offer is look at how much weight you have lost in such a short time. I pray I can come close. Thats an awesome acomplishment!! You should be so proud of yourself. So when that demon shows his ugly head, go look at yourself in the mirror . Look at what you did. Look at your hard work , and your looking good . Dont let it take that away from you. Good luck dont give your demon life , ignore him!!!

They take out the part that creates most of the hunger. You'll still get hungry and have to deal with the old behaviors and head cravings. This board seems to be great for that though.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm 4 months out' date=' and doing pretty well in general. But I just had a visit from the demon from hell......the closet eater inner self! I have the house to myself, and for some reason, as soon as I realized it, the thing that came to my mind was "I wonder what I can eat?" I even started to think about was might be available before I realized what was going on. I was a closet eating grazer before surgery. Must be why my kids couldn't figure out why I was so heavy - I was super effective at it. Anyway, I've been a model post VSG citizen, and I have not grazed at all, but I could. I knew this day would come, and I know it will again. I think grazing is more than just a habit, so changing my habits isn't going to fix this one. It's going to take a lot of will power to fight it. I'm interested in how others conquer this one?[/quote']

Thank you for sharing this. I'm pre-surgery and I also am triggered to eat when I'm alone. I don't get it but I'm in therapy for it. This just confirms what I suspected that surgery won't fix it. I will have to keep working hard. I feel where you're coming from.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've been banded (revision to sleeve soon due to a slip) for 3 1/2 yrs and can tell you this: They did surgery on my tummy, not on my brain. Oh how I wished they could take the part of the brain out that thinks about food constantly. Even after losing almost 100 lbs, I think about what I'm gunna eat my next meal, during that meal. My husband doesn't even think about food till he's hungry. We can be totally out of...say...eggs. He won't notice until he goes to make one and they're not there. I keep track of the food in my frig and cupboards constantly. Just to make sure theres enuf!

Since my band slipped and I've been unfilled, I will admit I've been eating much more than normal. And I will admit to doing something I hadn't done since getting proper restriciton (on my 3rd fill, 4 mths post op): Middle of the night snacking. I get up about every 90 minutes to pee at nite and once during the nite I'll creep out to the kitchen and grab a cookie that I've been hiding (my husband HATES carbs and can't stand looking at them, so I hide food. I know, a no-no) or an ice cream sandwich that I've managed to keep discreet at the back of the freezer.

If no one sees us eat it, then it doesn't count, right?

I've been a rule breaker from day 1 of having this band. Always pushing the limits. My first real food was a Burger King cheeseburger. not a good choice. Now that I'm having a revision, I'm gunna do things right this time. Especially cuz there's a chance of it leaking during the first months of healing. No more closet eating!!!

How come no one has a problem with closet eating carrots or broccoli?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Since my band slipped and I've been unfilled' date=' I will admit I've been eating much more than normal. And I will admit to doing something I hadn't done since getting proper restriciton (on my 3rd fill, 4 mths post op): Middle of the night snacking. I get up about every 90 minutes to pee at nite and once during the nite I'll creep out to the kitchen and grab a cookie that I've been hiding (my husband HATES carbs and can't stand looking at them, so I hide food. I know, a no-no) or an ice cream sandwich that I've managed to keep discreet at the back of the freezer.

If no one sees us eat it, then it doesn't count, right?

I've been a rule breaker from day 1 of having this band. Always pushing the limits. My first real food was a Burger King cheeseburger.?[/quote']

How do you think your husband would react to you telling him this? About hiding food?

I ask because I am still struggling even after the sleeve, but I'm taking steps to bring it more out in the open so I can talk about it with him and not keep this "dirty" little secret to myself.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Gosh this is such hard work. I always thinking about food too. I just ate a Protein Bar and was full but still grabbed that Peanut Butter cookie. :(. I'm wondering if we have anyone Cheetos left from the trip I am so guilty and am going to go hide in my room. Time to get to the park and walk.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Gosh this is such hard work. I always thinking about food too. I just ate a Protein bar and was full but still grabbed that Peanut Butter cookie. :(. I'm wondering if we have anyone Cheetos left from the trip I am so guilty and am going to go hide in my room. Time to get to the park and walk.

I think that's the weirdest part! I just ate dinner and I'm very full but my mouth wants more! I say mouth because although its head hunger my mouth is what wants to chew and taste 0_o

I think about how good something is and my mouth actually waters!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You're thinking of ghrelin hormone. It definitely helps' date=' but it doesn't eliminate "head hunger" which is even more powerful than physical hunger. It's our bad habits and food addiction at its worse.

"They're operating on your stomach, not your brain." I've read that phrase so many times on VST. It's true.

The hunger elimination is now an official "VSG Urban Legend".

Best of luck with your surgery and recovery.[/quote']

If they operated on our brains, OMGOODNESS! We'd all hit our goal weight overnight and it would be AWESOME!

In all seriousness though, I think this should be addressed by more surgeons and mental health professionals PRIOR to being sleeved. The head hunger issues are still going to exist from the time you're sent home (read the posts, folks!) to the time you hit the maintenance phase. So actual hunger is going to be an issue to work on, absolutely! As is ALL the mental garbage.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've been banded (revision to sleeve soon due to a slip) for 3 1/2 yrs and can tell you this: They did surgery on my tummy' date=' not on my brain. Oh how I wished they could take the part of the brain out that thinks about food constantly. Even after losing almost 100 lbs, I think about what I'm gunna eat my next meal, during that meal. My husband doesn't even think about food till he's hungry. We can be totally out of...say...eggs. He won't notice until he goes to make one and they're not there. I keep track of the food in my frig and cupboards constantly. Just to make sure theres enuf!

Since my band slipped and I've been unfilled, I will admit I've been eating much more than normal. And I will admit to doing something I hadn't done since getting proper restriciton (on my 3rd fill, 4 mths post op): Middle of the night snacking. I get up about every 90 minutes to pee at nite and once during the nite I'll creep out to the kitchen and grab a cookie that I've been hiding (my husband HATES carbs and can't stand looking at them, so I hide food. I know, a no-no) or an ice cream sandwich that I've managed to keep discreet at the back of the freezer.

If no one sees us eat it, then it doesn't count, right?

I've been a rule breaker from day 1 of having this band. Always pushing the limits. My first real food was a Burger King cheeseburger. not a good choice. Now that I'm having a revision, I'm gunna do things right this time. Especially cuz there's a chance of it leaking during the first months of healing. No more closet eating!!!

How come no one has a problem with closet eating carrots or broccoli?[/quote']

This is such a slippery slope, Marfar and I'm here to tell you that people get fat from carrots and broccoli when consumed in massive quantities- especially in secret. I certainly ate more than my fair share of unhealthy things, like homemade tacos and burritos but mostly I used too much butter on my sautéed vegetables or too much dressing on my salads. And I thought if I ate while no one else was around it didn't count! Wrong. I was almost 500lbs of wrong.

Like you, I think this would be easier with surgery on my brain instead of my stomach. If they could tweak the way I thought of salads, especially at this time of year. If they could rewire the way I thought of things like butter, cheese, and Caesar dressing then things would be simpler all the way around. And while they're in there, how about getting rid of my love of Helluva Good dip, just for good measure? :)

Since that's just a great fantasy, I'll just keep my sleeve. And I'll keep going to therapy every week. Then when I fall off the proverbial wagon, I'll document it using MyFitnessPal and start all over again the next day because at least I'm taking responsibility now, which I never did before. (But no matter what, I'm always going to be that fat chick with a food addiction!) :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

How are you doing now with this?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

How are you doing now with this?

Hi, thanks for checking back. For some reason, I never saw all the other responses on this thread, but I was happy to see others with the same issue. As I read my original post, I remembered that day. I did OK that day, and for the most part, I do on most days. I am finding some are more difficult than others. I still want to be a stress eater....so I avoid stress. I'm surprised at how I've learned to just let things go instead of perseverating on it. I wish I had been able to do that before, but I couldn't. I also hope this is a new skill, as opposed to just having less stress now :). I know that this is going to be a lifelong struggle. It's how I'm wired. I will say that head hunger is powerful and real, but it's no where near as bad as it was before surgery. I do have physical hunger, but it's greatly diminished and very manageable, so I think that makes it a little easier to combat the head hunger. Before, I had both things working against me. I always knew I had great will power, so I was mystified that I couldn't control my eating. I really think the surgery has dealt with the physical issues enough that it allows ME to deal with the mental issues. So, that's where I am today. I hope I can say the same thing in another 5 months or 5 years! I'm a little wary of thinking I've conquered this because I have failed at this my entire life, and I think it's too soon to declare victory. I'm very happy so far :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm so glad. I identify with the same struggles.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×