Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Second thoughts about surgery ..



Recommended Posts

So here's what's going on , I'm only 15 and I have my surgery date set for may 13th everything got approved and all and now I'm just thinking what if I can do this on my own ? How hard could it be ? I need help on what to do !

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Nate I can't tell you what to do... But I will say each one of us had moments of thinking the same thing!

I can tell you I can lose weight without surgery, I've done it many times in my adult life.

But I still needed to do this because after the diet I would go right back to where I was within a few months.

This is a major ( and sometimes not easy) change.

But I am glad to be doing it and it is worth the small sacrifices I have to make.

I will support you no matter what your decision is. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I feel ya Nate. At 15 I probably was pretty much in your shoes. I didn't have surgery as an option, so I did it the old fashioned way. I backed off my mom's table and dropped the junk food and got my ass in gear. I managed to drop some significant pounds between my Jr. and Sr. year in high school. It made a world of difference in my life, socially, physically and so on. I was able to keep the weight off for a certain number of years, but like a lot of us, it always came back. I thought a lot about your question and I wonder at 15 what I would have done if surgery would have been available. Knowing what I know now about eating and all the things that go on inside of us, I probably wouldn't do it. I might have given myself a year and just tried a few simple things like tracking what I ate (like with myfitnesspal), changing how I ate and getting some real exercise too. I don't mean just walking around, but something that puts out some real sweat. That's what I did, but I didn't stick with it long enough to push the old habits out of the way. Along the way I found some more habits that made trying to lose the weight a lot harder too.

This surgery and all that goes with it, is pretty complex. Yep of course you'll lose the weight, but it really takes a ton of work. That's something that I am not sure a lot of people are ready for nor can they accept the fact this it is a very permanent solution. At 15 for me, permanent lasted til next weekend. You seem like a pretty sharp guy so I know that what ever you decide it is going to be the right thing for you. If you feel like this is your very best choice and are willing to except that it is not reversible and not refundable, then I think you'll do fine. Otherwise, think hard about what you might be able to accomplish without the surgery. Good luck with this dude, what ever you decide, let us know, we are here for you!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I started a lifetime of dieting at about age 13. Seems like I was on some kind of diet more often than not. I just knew I should be able to do this on my own. YES I lost some weight on most of those diets, but never came close to a normal weight. Weight issues and low self esteem put a major damper on my life. I had no social life, never attended school functions, never danced, and never felt good enough. Finally in 1983, at age 59, and more than 300 pounds, I began looking into bariatric surgery. I had started the process when my dad became ill and died. I then proceeded to gain an additional 70 pounds, weighing 374. In 2011, I started seeing a therapist to help me deal with my dad's death and with my food/eating issues. That is the single most important step that helped me not only make a decision about the surgery, but also prepared me to be successful with the surgery. I suggest you find a therapist who specializes in helping people with food/eating/obesity and self esteem issues. My therapist continues to help me dealing with the stresses, diffulties and joys of life after gastric sleeve surgery. I can't advise you whether or not to have the surgery but I truly believe that without some therapy/counseling, successful weightloss will be a very difficult process. I sort of threw my life away, but can finally say at the age of 63, I got this weight thing under control. I have lost 168 pounds in just under 11 months and am well on my way (30 - 50 pounds to go) to a healthy, normal weight for the rest of my life. You have your whole life ahead of you. I wish you enormous success, health and happiness whatever your decision.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you all so much the support is amazing .. I meet with my therapist tomorrow I am going to talk it out with her .. But more than likely I will continue with having surgery !! Thank you all for sharing ! I'd be lost without this group!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My only concern with you being 15 and having the surgery, is that right now at your age, your hormones are going crazy. There are so many changes already going on with your body, that one huge change, like having surgery, may cause major depression. Definitely talk it out with your therapist and be open and honest.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

What do your parents think?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This is definitely a hard decision for you. I'm 23 and even I have that big question in my mind mostly because I am so young. It's scary to think you're permanently altering yourself at such a young age.

That being said, I struggled with my weight since I was about 7 or 8. When I was your age, I really started dieting and exercising. I lost weight and was an average size throughout high school and was relatively happy.

Then it just slowly started packing back on, from 180lbs when I was 15/16 to the 240lbs I'm at now at 23. And my highest was 260 two years ago. Honestly, I haven't got the surgery yet. I'm schedule for next Monday so I still have those doubts in my head. But I've seen myself battle this thing forever and it never goes away. For me, anyways.

You know what, you definitely could lose the weight on your own. But the bigger issue is keeping it off. Mine started gaining back when I became independent from my parents, learned to drive, and could suddenly stop at mcdonalds whenever I wanted. I could eat out with friends all the time.

You definitely need to prepare yourself for this. It won't be easy, not for any of us. But from what I've read in hundreds and hundreds of forums by this point, is that the #1 regret for people is that they didn't do the sleeve earlier.

Good luck!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

What do your parents think?

My dad had gastric bypass and was sooo successful but he isn't a big fan of me having it , on the other hand me and my mom have been attending meetings with the bariatric team for over a year atleast once a month , therefore she knows a lot an she is there for me with whatever I decide and I'm having it at a children's hospital as well

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My dad had gastric bypass and was sooo successful but he isn't a big fan of me having it , on the other hand me and my mom have been attending meetings with the bariatric team for over a year atleast once a month , therefore she knows a lot an she is there for me with whatever I decide and I'm having it at a children's hospital as well

You sound like you've really thought this through. Your parents must be very proud of you. It sounds like they are supportive, which is great.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You sound like you've really thought this through. Your parents must be very proud of you. It sounds like they are supportive' date=' which is great.[/quote']

Oh yes I have been thinking this through an doing TONS of research! What are your thoughts ??

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Nate, truly a tough decision and one only you can make. I myself wish I had had that option at your age. Most of my life has been very unhappily spent on the diet roller coaster. You said you have a therapist and that everything has been approved so your health care professionals obviously think this is the best course for you. Surgery is scary, but take comfort in the fact that you are not alone! We are all here for you! Best wishes and keep us posted. HUGS to you!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

.. I meet with my therapist tomorrow I am going to talk it out with her .!

Nate this right here tells me how mature and thoughtful you are at 15 or any age for that matter!

I know you will do well :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh yes I have been thinking this through an doing TONS of research! What are your thoughts ??

I think it's a really personal decision, Nate. I am really glad that I had my surgery and wish that I had done it sooner. I am a medical writer/editor who has covered adolescent medicine, and I remember hearing a saying once about so many chronic conditions (type 2 diabetes, osteoporosis, high cholesterol) being "pediatric diseases with adult implications." So basically the sooner you start preventing these conditions in your lifetime, the longer, healthier your life could end up being. I think you probably could lose some of the weight on your own, but the question will be about keeping it off. Surgery could help you do that.

With that said, I wouldn't begin to recommend that you get it or not get it. I can tell that you are a smart young man and your parents sound supportive, so I'm confident you will come to a decision that is best for you. I would just go into it eyes wide open and choose your surgeon very carefully and follow the post-op instructions to a "t." Even if you do that, and I'm sure that you will, complications can happen. I think everyone should go into the surgery and know that is a possiblity--expect the best, but be prepared for the worst.

If you have the surgery, there may be times when you wish you could drink a beer with your buddies (when you are 21 of course) or that you wish you could eat junk food or take a date out for a 5-course dinner. I would just be prepared for those mental things, but to me, the trade-off is completely worth it.

Whatever you decide, I wish you the very best, Nate. You clearly have a bright future ahead of you. Please keep us posted.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Nate I think it's great you are seeing a therapist beforehand. You sound like you are doing your research thoroughly as well. At the age of 39 almost 40 I have dieted a long long time. My first round at weight watchers I was 11. I've spent my whole life dieting. If this surgery would've been an option for me then I know I would've looked into it. It's your decision and it's a lot to think about. I think it's great to have it done young, then by the time you are older its just second nature to eat the way you have to with this surgery. On the other hand I agree with John, did you try limiting and tracking your calories? Increase your exercise? Only you can answer honestly and know all you have done to lose weight on your own. I think it is absolutely great that you are doing something about your weight now while you are so young, whether that be surgery or not! Good luck and know if you do go thru with it you will have great support on here!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Prdgrdma

      So I guess after gastric bypass surgery, I cant eat flock chips because they are fried???  They sell them on here so I thought I could have them. So high in protein and no carbs.  They don't bother me at all.  Help. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        It's possible for a very high fat meal to cause dumping in some (30% or so) gastric bypass patients, although it's more likely to be triggered by high sugar, or by the high fat/high sugar combo (think ice cream, donuts). Dietitians will tell you to never do anything that isn't 100% healthy ever again. Realistically, you should aim for a good balance of protein, carbs, and fat each day. Should you eat fried foods every day? No. Is it possible they will make you sick? Maybe. Is it okay to eat some to see what happens and have them for a treat every now and again? Yes.

    • NovelTee

      I'm not at all hungry on this liquid pre-op diet, but I miss the sensation of chewing. It's been about two weeks––surgery is in two days––and I can't imagine how I'll feel a couple of weeks post-op. Tonight, I randomly stumbled upon a mukbang channel on YouTube, and it was strangely soothing... is it just me, or is this a thing? 
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        I actually watched cooking shows during my pre-op, like Great British Baking Show. It was a little bizarre, but didn't make me hungry. I think it was also soothing in a way.

    • Clueless_girl

      How do you figure out what your ideal weight should be? I've had a figure in my head for years, but after 3 mths of recovery I'm already almost there. So maybe my goal should be lower?
      · 3 replies
      1. NickelChip

        Well, there is actually a formula for "Ideal Body Weight" and you can use a calculator to figure it out for you. This one also does an adjusted weight for a person who starts out overweight or obese. https://www.mdcalc.com/calc/68/ideal-body-weight-adjusted-body-weight

        I would use that as a starting point, and then just see how you feel as you lose. How you look and feel is more important than a number.

      2. Clueless_girl

        I did find different calculators but I couldn't find any that accounted for body frame. But you're right, it is just a number. It was just disheartening to see that although I lost 60% of my excess weight, it's still not in the "normal/healthy" range..

      3. NickelChip

        I think it's important to remember that the weight charts and BMI ranges were developed a very long time ago and only intended to be applied to people who have never been overweight or obese. Those numbers aren't for us. When you are larger, especially for a long time, your body develops extra bone to support the weight. Your organs get a little bigger to handle the extra mass. Your entire infrastructure increases so you can support and function with the extra weight. That doesn't all go away just because you burn off the excess fat. If you still had a pair of jeans from your skinniest point in life and then lost weight to get to the exact number on the scale you were when those jeans fit you, chances are they would be a little baggy now because you would actually be thinner than you were, even though the scale and the BMI chart disagree. When in doubt, listen to the jeans, not the scale!

    • Aunty Mamo

      Tomorrow marks two weeks since surgery day and while I'm feeling remarkably well and going about just about every normal activity, I did wind up with a surface abscess on on of my incision sights and was put on an antibiotic that made me so impacted that it took me more than two hours to eliminate yesterday and scared the hell out of me. Now there's Miralax in all my beverages that aren't Smooth Move tea. I cannot experience that again. I shouldn't have to take Ativan to go to the lady's. I really looking forward to my body getting with the program again. 
      I'm in day three of the "puree" stage of eating and despite the strange textures, all of the savory flavors seem decadent. 
      I timed this surgery so that I'd be recovering during my spring break. That was a good plan. Today is a state holiday and the final day of break. I feel really strong to return to school tomorrow. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Now that I'm in maintenance mode, I'm getting a into a routine for my meals. Every day, I start out with 8-16 ounces of water, and then a proffee, which I have come to look forward to even the night before. My proffees are simply a black coffee with a protein powder added. There are three products that I cycle through: Premier Vanilla, Orgain Vanilla, and Dymatize Vanilla.
      For second breakfast on workdays, I will have a low-fat yogurt with two tablespoons of PBFit and two teaspoons of no sugar added dried cherries. I will have ingested 35-45 grams of protein at this point between the two breakfasts, with 250-285 calories, and about 20 carbs.
      For second breakfast on non-workdays, I will prepare two servings of plain, instant oatmeal with a tablespoon of an olive oil-based spread. This means I will have had 34 grams of protein, 365 calories, and 38 carbs. Non-workdays are when I am being very active with training sessions, so I allow myself more carbohydrate fuel.
      Snacks on any day are always mixed nuts, even when I am travelling. I will have 0.2 cups of a blend that I make myself. It consists of dry roasted peanuts, cashews, pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds, pistachios, and Brazil nuts. This is 5 grams of protein, 163 calories, and 7 carbs.
      Breakfast and snacks have been the easiest to nail down. Lunch and dinner have more variables, and I prepare enough for leftovers. I concentrate on protein first, and then add vegetables. Typically tempeh, tofu, or Field Roast products with roasted or sautéed vegetables. Today, I will be eating leftovers from last night. Two ounces of tempeh with four ounces of roasted vegetables that consist of red and yellow sweet peppers, sweet potatoes, small purple potatoes, zucchini, and carrots. I will add a tablespoon of olive oil-based spread, break up 3 walnuts to sprinkle of top, and garnish with two tablespoons of grated Parmesan cheese. This particular meal will be 19 grams of protein, 377 calories, and 28 grams of carbs. Bear in mind that I do eat more carbs when I am not working, and I focus on ingesting healthy carbs instead of breads/crackers/chips/crisps.
      It's a helluva journey and I'm thankful to be on it!
       
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×