What happens After...

[Tisa 52]

Have you ever been afraid of what happens after? I mean once everything is said and done and you're "skinny".I keeping thinking that people paying attention to me once i lose weight, and people noticing me.I kind of feel like I don't want to be one of them... because won't it all be fake then?I feel like being as big as I am weeds out people with certain intentions from speaking to me... i mean yeah i don't want to be obese anymore... but at the same time i don't want to be surrounded by fake people.. has anyone ever felt this way? How do you deal with it?

[makemyownluck 785]

I feel that way. All the time.

I even asked my friend, who's also obese, "Will you still be my friend when I'm skinny?" She looked at me like I was nuts.

Honestly, I'm really not looking forward to the attention. I wish there was the magic wand that we could just wake up tomorrow skinny, and that we were ALWAYS skinny, so no one even notices a difference.

Very curious to see how this will play out, for sure!

[Ms skinniness 3,003]

OMG! It is awesome to be noticed......

This is the way it should be........We are important and skinny....

I do know that it will feel uncomfortable for you at first, but if you work on changing your thoughts to "how awesome is this that other people are noticing me...." It is not shallow, it's just humans noticing others.....Yes, when a person is over weight it is painful because of the stigmas from society and all. But we do have to deal with this too. You are beautiful inside and out so let's just embrace who we are as a person! Absolutely beautiful.....

[HoosierGirl 780]

Had not thought about this. I guess I don't expect my circle of friends to change.

Plus, not sure much will bug me when I am wearing normal sized underwear. Lol

[pantala 125]

We will have to learn to manage a lot of things without the protection of fat and food. It's called personal growth and won't just happen on it's own. And yes, ppl who pay attention to us when we are skinny but ignored us when we were fat are very shallow and we will know something about them that others don't.

You/we will always be more compassionate and less judging than the ones who didn't have to struggle this way; don't lose that. Focus on your own growth and not what others are doing, saying, thinking.

[makemyownluck 785]

I was just telling my friend that I mentioned in the earlier post that I was approved for surgery. She was telling me she's excited and can't wait to see me skinny.

I told her, "Well, yeah, I'll be skinny, but it's not gonna be pretty. Picture a skinny person who is melting into a puddle."

I literally wanted to grab the words out of my mouth as I was saying them. Where is all this negativity coming from inside of me? I feel like I'm trying to prepare people for the WORST instead of embracing this as THE BEST thing I could be doing for myself.

Gonna try to work on that. Attitude is everything and mine could use an adjustment!

[PhoenixTheDiva 112]

I can understand your concern but even as fat individuals we come into contact with fake people. They smile in your face and stab you in the back. For me personally I just do whats best for me. People always say I'm a diva and I'm okay with that. If people want to take a fat girl being confident in herself as diva I can live with that because who I am and what I choose to feel about myself is upto me. I want to have this surgery for my health. I'm blessed that my circle of friends and family love me and support no matter what my body shape. So dont worry about other people because you will see when all is said and done the real ones will be there no matter what. Good luck and stay fabulous and always be true to you ; )

[Vixynne 695]

I was just telling my friend that I mentioned in the earlier post that I was approved for surgery. She was telling me she's excited and can't wait to see me skinny.

I told her, "Well, yeah, I'll be skinny, but it's not gonna be pretty. Picture a skinny person who is melting into a puddle."

I literally wanted to grab the words out of my mouth as I was saying them. Where is all this negativity coming from inside of me? I feel like I'm trying to prepare people for the WORST instead of embracing this as THE BEST thing I could be doing for myself.

Gonna try to work on that. Attitude is everything and mine could use an adjustment!

Don't be too hard on yourself. If you're like me, you might have spent YEARS deflecting compliments or worse, running a "negative self-talk tape" on a constant loop in your head. It becomes almost a reflex to deflect a compliment with a negative phrase that starts with "Thanks, but..." or "Yeah, but..."

Old habits die hard, but you'll squash this one. BECAUSE YOU'RE AWESOME.

(Now, don't deflect that one, just sit there and take it. See? You can do this!)

[MeMeMEEE 206]

I haven't had a problem with friends but I do feel judged by larger people who don't know me and don't know about surgery. I want to whip out my bat wings and panni and wave **hi**

[aquitenonnymouse 206]

I haven't had a problem with friends but I do feel judged by larger people who don't know me and don't know about surgery. I want to whip out my bat wings and panni and wave **hi**

Ha! I can just picture that. <snort>