I thought it might be a good idea to have a thread where we could discuss the different challenges/issues we face as being single and banded.

I'll start with introducing myself. My name is Chris, I am 32 and live in a suburb of Boston. About a year ago I got out of a 5 year relationship and have just casually dated (online dating) since then. I have decided to take a break from dating for a bit, so I can focus on myself and adjust to living life as a bandster. (I was just banded on 10/2). One of my biggest concerns when I start dating again is if/when to tell that I am banded. It's not that I don't want to tell people, it's just that my idea of great dinner conversation does not include discussing my weight. Overall I would say that I have a great life. I have a good job, a very supportive family, and lots of friends. I am happy to be taking control over my weight and issues with food, and am excited at the prospect of my future as a not-so-fat woman.

I look forward to meeting more single bandsters and hope this thread takes off!

Chris :cocktail:

JC, Shannon & Derby, thank you guys for (1) making me feel welcome to the thread and (2) for your support. I am sure I will be looking to you guys for continued support. Between you guys and my friends here at home, I am sure I will get through this phase of my life. Right now though, I feel like a loser and like the 25 years with my husband were all a lie since he has told me that our marriage has been s&@t from the beginning... Thank goodness for my 2 wonderful kids who have supported me and have told me that they support and love me. Unfortunately, their relationship with their dad is strained, and of course, I am getting the blame for that from certain family members and from him. I'm just really tired of being shot down and blamed for everything wrong in his life. Anyway, thanks guys and I'll be "talking" to you. By the way, JC, I wish I had the energy you have.... I've just taken up walking 3 miles a few nights a week which started out to be not for me, but for my daughter who is a dancer and was told by her teacher in order for her to move to the next level must lose some weight and the walking was to help her, but I feel better (you are 100% right about exercise) doing it. It feels like an accomplishment. Anyway, gotta start working now...

Yvonne

Sugar , Welcome to our little corner of lap band talk. We are all very friendly and supportive here. You have come to the right place!

JC, Do they know what causes you to slip? this time it was a kidney stone and you were vomiting? Going on liquids for awhile didn't help? I am so sorry to hear this. You are so committed to the band and have done so well. I am glad to hear your doctor is going to try to save your ban

To Edit: Highlight everything you have typed. Click on edit. that brings you to all the smiley faces. Click on edit again, and it will bring you back to the screen where you typed out your reply. Make you changes, then click on save changes. I am pretty sure this is how to do it, but I will go back right now and see if I can edit this, following those steps. There were edit instructions on another thread, and when I follow them, I can edit my post.

I just edited this post, and it worked.

Denise, thanks for the welcome. I already feel like you all are my friends.

Yvonne

So, a buddy of mine buzzes me and says "I found a date for ya if you want it." Seems someone at his office was asking him if he knew anyone.

I have no clue on what she looks like, what she likes, etc.

I don't know really whether to say yes or not. I'm still not happy with my look, and it hasn't been too long since the divorce was final.

What's a low-pressure blind-"date" idea?

Hey Manatee, I wouldn't do something you do feel ready to do. If you want to go and you want to more up front start quizzing your friend.

Low pressure in my book equals the old saying "there is safety in numbers" Any kind of group type outing is an OK first blind date. She may appreciate it too, gives her a chance to try and figure out if you are someone she feels comfortable being "alone" with.

Just my two cents, I am sure some of the others will have good or better suggestions.

JC

Manatee I say you go for it! What do you have to lose? I say meet up for a drink after work, a lunch date, or something simple like that. Low key and low pressure. You're just meeting up to see if there is anything there. If not, maybe you made a new friend and it was still a night you did not have to sit at home. If there is something there, even better. Give it a shot!

Welcome Yvonne! Glad you found us. I'm so sorry to hear about your marriage and that things aren't going well with the separation. I'm sure it will be difficult to get through, but it sounds like you have the support of a loving family and, of course, us!

Denise I'm glad you're enjoying your trip to Arizona!

JC you always amaze me! When do you see the doctor again? I'm pulling for you!

So not much to update with me other than that things are going pretty well for me and my man. No big "talk" yet like Leona, but we're doing well. lol

Hey Crispy, thanks for the welcome, I already feel like I made friends on this thread. JC when is your next doc appt? I hope all goes well, keep us posted.

Yvonne

Thanks Denise, I think the whole thing started a few months ago, I believe I was overfilled at that time and it has snowballed from there.

Chrispy, I am not sure how I amaze you, but it feels good that you think that. How are things with you? Are you still coming down to Florida on vacation?

Yvonne, My next appointment is Sept5.

Thank you to everyone for the concern and well wishes! You are all very special!

JC

Ok guys I took some recent pics and thought I'd post them for you. This is down about 58 or so pounds. I say I'd like to lose another 40 and then see how I feel from there. I'm wearing 18's on the bottom and 14/16's on the top and can get into some XL tops.

I'd love to see everyone's pics too if you're willing to share!

Chrispy! Wow Girl check you out! You must be feeling really awesome right about now. Way to go!!!

JC

Awww thanks JC. Better, but not awesome. Glad I got my waist back though. lol

I want to see YOUR pics though. Down 130 lbs!! That's amazing!

Ok Chrispy, but remember, you asked for it, I unfortunately am not very photogenic!

<p>Damn, that was a gigantic pic. That red flashing light in the southern sky is me freakin blushing! Holy Cow!Next time I will use the preview button</p>

Hey all hope all is well!

JC - I am still praying for you, no matter what you are going to be great!

Chrispygal - You look GREAT! You should be so proud of yourself!

Sugar1 - Welcome, I am going through a divorce myself. Have been seperated originally since 2001 we tried to get bacjk together to work it out one year later but that only lasted 9 months, until I left again. We first got together when I was in high school and he is 7 years older than I am. I had our daughter when I was 17 and we got married when I was 21. We seperated when I was 24. So I myself didn't know anything about dating either, so I knida know where you are coming from. I am 30 now and am actually looking to settle down again, I would love to get married and have more children someday, especially since my baby is almost 13 now :cry. Keep your head up, we are all here for support!

Manatee - I agree with Chrispygal - Meet up for lunch, or after work coffee or drinks. That is light and you can conversate.

As for me - I am HAPPY and NERVOUS! I got a call today that my surgeon had a cancellation and is able to see me on September 4th instead of September 27th to reevaluate me to see if I have lost enough weight to schedule me for the surgery. I started on November 14th at 416 lbs. as of today at the doctors office I am down to 391 lbs. I have to lose at least 10-16 more lbs before September 4th (that is why I am nervous) and then I might have to lose another 15 lbs. before the surgery. :omg: