I thought it might be a good idea to have a thread where we could discuss the different challenges/issues we face as being single and banded.

I'll start with introducing myself. My name is Chris, I am 32 and live in a suburb of Boston. About a year ago I got out of a 5 year relationship and have just casually dated (online dating) since then. I have decided to take a break from dating for a bit, so I can focus on myself and adjust to living life as a bandster. (I was just banded on 10/2). One of my biggest concerns when I start dating again is if/when to tell that I am banded. It's not that I don't want to tell people, it's just that my idea of great dinner conversation does not include discussing my weight. Overall I would say that I have a great life. I have a good job, a very supportive family, and lots of friends. I am happy to be taking control over my weight and issues with food, and am excited at the prospect of my future as a not-so-fat woman.

I look forward to meeting more single bandsters and hope this thread takes off!

Chris :cocktail:

LeO-I love your wrist idea. Absolutely, love it! I might have to copy that one. I have three tatts. Before you get one, know that they are addicting and make sure they mean something to you. Which of course that one does!! So happy for you, take everything easy.

JC--Chicken Tortilla Soup from Boston Market blended to heck is really yummy too!

How tall are all of you? I'm wondering how my heigth , or lack of it, will play into this whole thing. I am exacto 5 feeto!

5'6" here.

Heeeey Kristi!!! I've been wondering how you've been doing! I was just thinking about you the other day. I'm so glad you checked in! :tea: So is this guy your tattoo boy, or someone we don't know about? lol. As far as my fill level, I can eat probably about 2/3 of a protein bar in one sitting and I know for sure I don't want more fill. I do get sick every now and again and it does take me a while to eat even a small amount. My scale is moving slower, but I could defintely kick up the exercise notch a bit and I'd rather do that before I get another fill. I don't want to get overfilled because I think that can start a horrible chain reaction.

JC way to go on losing 4 of your 11 pounds! That is GREAT! I don't blame you for being anxious and worried, I would be too. I say little prayers all the time that you and your band will be ok.

Leona - congrats on your first boyfriend! Yeah!!!! I'm glad you guys spoke and I'll be pulling for you!

I'm 5'6" by the way. I forget who asked. lol

Hello to all:

Haven't been on this site much - busy with work/home and enjoying the wonderful weather.

PigsRflying - congrats on your recent surgery and JC hope you are feeling much better.

I am busy concentrating on learning how to live with the band. After 2 restrictions I can still eat quite a bit which worries me. I go for my 3rd fill next week and I hope that will reduce the amount of food I'm shoving into my big mouth. I still don't understand when I'm full and I get a lot of cravings. I'm also concerned about stretching my pouch.

I've joined a health club and do aquafit classes 3-4 times per week and the rest of the time I swim in my brother's pool. I'm getting excited since I'm starting to see my body change and it's such a great feeling.

For the time being, I'm not interested in doing any dating until I lose all my weight and that's the vibe I'm putting out there. Therefore, nobody dares to cross that threshold :biggrin1:.

I'm counting the days to the end of September when I'm planning to visit North Port Florida and spend 12 days going to the springs and basically improving my health.

That's all the news I have - have a great week everyone.

Carla

DerbyGirl, my son is fixing up a preschool playground for his project. Do they serve tequilla at Chuck E. Cheese? LOL

Thanks everyone for the recipes and well wishes.

Chrispy, thanks for the prayers I will take all of them I can get, you are a sweetheart, I mean it.

I think the whole tough guy thing has given way to fear/nerves. I know I can handle anything that comes my way I have proven it too many times in the past, but I am spooked right now. Maybe I am not busy enough and have had too much time to think about things.

I keep telling myself, I am not feeling pain, no longer throwing-up, no fever, which seems to indicate that I am fine and should not require any further intervention. If it wasn't for that (should) word...........

JC

How silly I feel. I just realized that this site has more than one page. I was on the first page and wondered why it had sort of dropped. There are 65 more pages! How excited I was. I'm really jazzed.

Had my first fill on Monday. Felt it right away,but by Wednesday, I don't feel any restriction. I hold myself to eating less, and am losing, and maybe that's what it is all about anyway. I never thought I would enjoy a carton of lemon yogurt so much as I did today for lunch.

To go along with the book "He's just not that into you" is one called "Face it, you are just not that into him either". You know how it is that you always want what you can't have. When you really look at it, you really don't want it anyway. It opened my eyes to the habit of "settling for" which is something I have always done. No more. I'm not settling for a man who is not worthy of me, not settling for a weight that is not healthy for me, or settling for...... You fill in the blank.

Off tomorrow to see my daughter in Sacramento (I'm in Portland). Can't wait for her to see her mom at 25 lbs less than last visit...and still losing.

Hi everyone,

I am at the library in Mesa Arizona. I am visiting my dad who has no idea that I am banded. I don't want to listen to him lecture me on how much money I spent and that I really could have done it on my own.

I don't remember who asked me about my weight loss. I started at 215

and I was at 170 this am. I am not losing as fast as others but I am used to it now, and I am happy that at least it's going in the right direction. I am going to get another fill when I get back home. I was

able to eat two small pieces of pizza That's where my dad wanted to stop on the way home from the airport.

I am worried about gaining while I am here because it's so much harder for me to lose than gain. I have to be really careful.

The guy who messaged me and said he wanted to start writing again never wrote back after I answered his message.

If I don't check in as much, it's because I wasn't able to get back to the library to use a computer. It's hard pleasing my dad and I have my son and his fiance with me too. I am stuck in the middle because my dad always says we don't come to see him, we just come to run around.

It's so hard to have an 88 year old father living alone with me in Oregon. I need to get him moved into assisted living, but I have no clue how to empty out his house. It's a huge dimemma. My brother wants Dad to move back to Chicago, but I know he would hate the winters there.

Denise, I asked about your progress...and it sounds like you're doin' great.

JC, I don't think you have anything to worry about. I might worry about others (including myself) in your position. Some of us have used the band more like a crutch than a tool. But I think since you're such an avid biker, there's absolutely no way (even if you lost the band) that you COULD return to your former self. I just don't see it--you've done a true 180. There are a handful of people here on the boards I look up to for their accomplishments, and you are one of them. You can reach your goal with or without the band at this point.

DerbyGirl, thank you, I have been telling my self the same thing. I kinda find it hard to convince myself.

On the upside, I have everything I need for the monster bike ride. The hammock tent which is so comfortable, the maps some of the best maps I have seen aside from the Government quad maps I used to use while surveying, gel pack nourishment, GPS, MP3 player... oh and a sadistic brain (it helps!) It will be a 5 state ride if I make the entire distance.

BTW I jogged 4 miles yesterday!!!!!! That is HUGE for me! I am down another 2 pounds so I am almost back down to where I was when released from the hospital.

JC

OK everyone, it is 7:00 am and I am headed to Tampa to get the GOOD News!!!!!

JC

ooo JC... I can't wait to hear it! Let us know as soon as you know! I'm glad you are feeling better!

Oh Denise, sorry to hear about you father's situation... Just remember to make sure that YOU come first. I feel for you, I know it must be hard, but stay strong- you've come such a long way!

Matt started to act a bit different after we decided to be exclusive. But then after a few beers last night, he was more attentive than ever at Beer Pong. I don't know what's up with him... I seem to pull him out of his shell and then the next time I see him, he's shy again. Ugh, guys are weird.

I'm really getting stressed about moving to NYC in 2 weeks. But I finally have an apartment to move into! It's going to be great! I'm living a block and a half away from my school, so I can easily go home on breaks, but I can still get away from it! I'm gonna live in a 3bdroom with a Columbia film student, and a double bass player from my school (Manhattan School of Music).

Well, That's about it for now... only time will tell if Matt and I are willing to go long-distance. If yes, then that's great.. if not, well I now know that I'm worth someone special!

Denise- You are in a hard situation. It is hard to take care of elderly parents. My mother has to do that for two elderly parents. As far as I am concerned, the people that do it, do it well, and are truly saints.

JC--Thinking about you all morning. Let us know.

LeO--I am so jealous of you moving to NYC. I have always wanted to live there even if just for a brief time. There is NO other city quite the same. Live it up woman! Might not be the time to have a boyfriend!! lol

Derb-Whats going on with you?

Me--I had to get on here and tell you guys. That I gained three pounds of gas with the surg. However, since Tues. I have lost that gas weight plus two of my own pounds! So, I am on my way the first two pounds adiosed! yay!

lol PigzRflying... This will be the 6th year I've lived there... I love it!!! But with so many people there, it still is pretty lonely... but the bar/club scene is awesome! So come up and VISIT ME!

Denise, I really have to say that I think you're losing at an ok rate. We were told this would take 2-3 years for us, and honestly I haven't lost a whole heck of a lot more than you, especially when you consider that you started at a lower rate. Don't beat yourself up. If you're eating a healthy diet and getting some exercise, and still lowing - even if it's reaaaallllly slow, you're still doing GREAT!

JC I can't wait to hear what the docs have to say. I hope it's good news!

Leona I totally agree that guys are weird and I don't understand them 95% of the time. So much for my dating expertise. lol

Leona, that sounds really cool. What do you play? Are you worried about being a bandster in that environment?

PigsRFlying, nothing much going on here. I'm trying to decide what to do with the weekend. I have a band adjustment tomorrow because I swear it feels like they took some out when I was adjusted last month. So it's all liquids all weekend for me. I never want to be out amongst the living when I'm on all liquids. It's hard because, you know, you're constantly bombarded by food when you're with other people. My friends and family know I'm banded, but I told them from the beginning that they aren't supposed to act (eat) any differently just because I had this surgery. (This is because my mother wanted to cancel Thanksgiving dinner last year.) Most of the time, eating with non-bandsters doesn't bother me, but sometimes I can't help but feel stressed and a little deprived...especially on liquids!

Denise, if you weren't careful, would you gain a lot of weight? When I'm not paying attention and eating all the wrong things, I don't typically gain over 5 pounds...even if I eat junk for a month (and, yes, I have done that). I'm just wondering if maybe you haven't found your "sweet spot" and need more fill.

JC, I'm anxious to hear what you found out and, honestly, a little worried since you haven't posted yet. Hopefully you're just busy.