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Word vomit?! Give me strength. Leave the poor girl alone' date=' she said nothing wrong. People on this public forum take offence at the drop of a hat, I don't get it.[/quote']

Thanks for your support....it doesn't matter what I would say she would argue it. I apologized and that's all I can do. Geez never thought this would create such drama!

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I think we all have very different ways of expressing how we feel and what we are trying to say- this site is accessed by people from all over the globe. She may not have expressed herself as graciously as others would have like however I don't believe there was anything malicious in what was said either. Plus an apology was offered, so let's go easy on eachother, we are all in the same boat and we all have different issues we are personally dealing with. Embrace our different opinions instead of attacking eachother!

I was fairly ok with my body pre sleeve, however I was also very single so there was a 2 and 1/2 year gap between partners....I have lost 25kg (x 2.2 for lb) and have a new partner. He thinks there is absolutely nothing wrong with my body and shape as it is now, so i pictured us having amazing sex all over the place.....however the problem I have is....well....how can I say this delicately....he is African, and extremely well endowed and I feel like a virgin again!!.....I'm going to put it out there and say it....it's like a 12 inch coke can!!!!! Ouch! I can barely get him in and when I do it's painful for the most part. So could it be that it has just been a really long time between partners or could I have 'lost' from there as well as all over my body? I feel disappointed because I was really looking forward to sex at a smaller size, to relax and just enjoy sex with someone who finds me sexually attractive....instead im terrified for the most part and unable to relax and release my inner goddess Lol! has anyone else noted a smaller vjay jay?

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This site has the most SENSITIVE people I have ever seen in my life! Or maybe its insecurity? I am not sure but OMG... Y'all talk about being offended about everything that you have internal issues with - making other people feel like they have to walk on eggshells. We are (or were) FAT.. Despite this one dreadful thing we all have in common, we do not see things the same. Think about that before jumping down someone's throat.

I am fat, and I LOVE sex!! My sex life is wonderful.. The lady who wrote that envies ME and others like me who dont care about my fat jiggling everywhere... She was not insensitive. She is clearly saying that she was a bit insecure about her fat when she was bigger and didn't enjoy sex.. Don't like what she wrote? KIM (keep it moving.. its not that serious)

And thanks for envying me babes.. I hope you get that new found " hot sexy mama" confidence as you reach your weight loss goals.

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I think we all have very different ways of expressing how we feel and what we are trying to say- this site is accessed by people from all over the globe. She may not have expressed herself as graciously as others would have like however I don't believe there was anything malicious in what was said either. Plus an apology was offered' date=' so let's go easy on eachother, we are all in the same boat and we all have different issues we are personally dealing with. Embrace our different opinions instead of attacking eachother!

I was fairly ok with my body pre sleeve, however I was also very single so there was a 2 and 1/2 year gap between partners....I have lost 25kg (x 2.2 for lb) and have a new partner. He thinks there is absolutely nothing wrong with my body and shape as it is now, so i pictured us having amazing sex all over the place.....however the problem I have is....well....how can I say this delicately....he is African, and extremely well endowed and I feel like a virgin again!!.....I'm going to put it out there and say it....it's like a 12 inch coke can!!!!! Ouch! I can barely get him in and when I do it's painful for the most part. So could it be that it has just been a really long time between partners or could I have 'lost' from there as well as all over my body? I feel disappointed because I was really looking forward to sex at a smaller size, to relax and just enjoy sex with someone who finds me sexually attractive....instead im terrified for the most part and unable to relax and release my inner goddess Lol! has anyone else noted a smaller vjay jay?

[/quote']

What state do u live in because I think you are dating my x boyfriend!! Lol. I felt your pain literally! I don't think it really has anything to do with weight loss....I don't think we are made to handle that much I really don't. It is a hard thing to understand or deal with and I hope maybe you guys can get creative and find a few comfortable ways. I feel bad for men that are that big I am sure they run into this issue a lot.

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This site has the most SENSITIVE people I have ever seen in my life! Or maybe its insecurity? I am not sure but OMG... Y'all talk about being offended about everything that you have internal issues with - making other people feel like they have to walk on eggshells. We are (or were) FAT.. Despite this one dreadful thing we all have in common' date=' we do not see things the same. Think about that before jumping down someone's throat.

I am fat, and I LOVE sex!! My sex life is wonderful.. The lady who wrote that envies ME and others like me who dont care about my fat jiggling everywhere... She was not insensitive. She is clearly saying that she was a bit insecure about her fat when she was bigger and didn't enjoy sex.. Don't like what she wrote? KIM (keep it moving.. its not that serious)

And thanks for envying me babes.. I hope you get that new found " hot sexy mama" confidence as you reach your weight loss goals.[/quote']

I totally agree and I hope I follow I'm your footsteps girl!! Congrats!!!! I am jealous!

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however the problem I have is....well....how can I say this delicately....he is African, and extremely well endowed and I feel like a virgin again!!.....I'm going to put it out there and say it....it's like a 12 inch coke can!!!!! Ouch! I can barely get him in and when I do it's painful for the most part. So could it be that it has just been a really long time between partners or could I have 'lost' from there as well as all over my body?

OMG.. Run girl! LOL.. Just messing!

12 inch Coke can? My ex was like that and at 324lbs, it was VERY uncomfortable and I never enjoyed him. On top of that, latex irritates me and I guess because he was so big, it was even worse!! Good luck with that. Try some lubes if you haven't already.

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I think its more of a comfort thing - with the limitation of certain positions. I cannot imagine fully "going at it" immediately, but I can see certain positions being acceptable.. I saw some post-op instructions that said 2 weeks.

"I wonder if that is considered a clear liquid or a full liquid" LOLOLOL HA HA HA

Just messing.. (SERIOUSLY)

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What state do u live in because I think you are dating my x boyfriend!! Lol. I felt your pain literally! I don't think it really has anything to do with weight loss....I don't think we are made to handle that much I really don't. It is a hard thing to understand or deal with and I hope maybe you guys can get creative and find a few comfortable ways. I feel bad for men that are that big I am sure they run into this issue a lot.

I'm from Queensland in Australia. I hope it's not your ex....or maybe it would be good u could give me some pointers lol. I think it had been a issue for him in the past- he gets really embarrassed if I point out how ginormous he is...lol.

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OMG.. Run girl! LOL.. Just messing!

12 inch Coke can? My ex was like that and at 324lbs' date=' it was VERY uncomfortable and I never enjoyed him. On top of that, latex irritates me and I guess because he was so big, it was even worse!! Good luck with that. Try some lubes if you haven't already.[/quote']

Haha...run girl! Lol....i feel like it afterwards sometimes! Yeah latex is an issue too...it just breaks by the end- which freaks me out too. Lube is free flowing and he is very patient and gentle....but I am still tearing, not sure how long I can keep this up. Such a shame cause although it's early days, he seems like he could be potential long term.

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Omg when my bf and can have sex I think it crazed frenzy! No sex for three more weeks!:-(

Wait, I totally forgot about the original post!! 3 more weeks?

OMG! I would get a second (or third) opinion.. If not, yall need to do everything you can except for the actual intercourse. I think I can make it 3 weeks being a little "extra freaky"..

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Rybecca, I understand what you meant. Ignore the drama :)

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Haha...run girl! Lol....i feel like it afterwards sometimes! Yeah latex is an issue too...it just breaks by the end- which freaks me out too. Lube is free flowing and he is very patient and gentle....but I am still tearing, not sure how long I can keep this up. Such a shame cause although it's early days, he seems like he could be potential long term.

Good luck on that one.. Some positions were better for me- most of them I had more control than he did. But if he got too excited, it was pain regardless..

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Thank u I guess that is a much better way of saying it!! That is exactly what I meant!!

So now that you aren't "fat" anymore, are u more confident sexually? I ask because sometimes it is all in our mind and not in our bodies.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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