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Sex... Oh My God... Sex!



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Thanks for bragging...I mean being brave enough to share your wonderful experience. Heck I would brag too...if it would have happened to me!

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Thanks for bragging...I mean being brave enough to share your wonderful experience. Heck I would brag too...if it would have happened to me!

Well, thing is, I don't feel like I'm some kind of huge stud or something; I just feel like maybe this is what a "normal, healthy" male libido is like at my age when you're near target weight, working on your physical fitness, and are rarin' to go.

In other words, it's not so much "I'm such a stud now!" as "Why on EARTH didn't I get this surgery in my 20's..."

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My husband isn't obese but now I want him to get the sleeve!

Actually, that is totally what I wanted to say Louise...I was just trying to be nice to the hubby! :)

And ouroborous, I didn't mean it as a slam in any way. I seriously would brag! It's OK to feel like a stud after feeling like a dud for years!! Pat yourself on the back, it's OK.

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My husband isn't obese but now I want him to get the sleeve!

:D

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Well congrats on the accomplishment...lol it is true skinny sex is so much better than fat sex. I personally can bend and wrap legs and other body parts in ways I never thought possible, and the hubs is enjoying every minute of it... As am I. Heheheh :)

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That gives new meaning to "Go, O, Go!". ;). Yee Haw!!!

Lissa

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This is fabulous. I shouldn't share too much but neither my husband nor I have wanted to do anything like that recently. We love each other very much. We cuddle and kiss and show so much affection, but THAT takes a lot out of two big people who work all the time. I was sleeved on 8/10, and he is eating what I eat. He's not doing the shakes and liquids, but he consumes the same calories and the same grams of Protein. He's lost 10lbs since I started the pre-op diet two weeks ago. Reading this made me feel good not because of the sex but because it solidified what I already knew - sex is hard work, and can be embarassing for a bigger guy. It's not just me. It's both of us. Now he says he wants to be as sexy for me as I will be for him. We've become closer. So, the sleeve can do as much good for healthy relationships as it can tear apart the unhealthy ones.

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This is fabulous. I shouldn't share too much but neither my husband nor I have wanted to do anything like that recently. We love each other very much. We cuddle and kiss and show so much affection, but THAT takes a lot out of two big people who work all the time. I was sleeved on 8/10, and he is eating what I eat. He's not doing the shakes and liquids, but he consumes the same calories and the same grams of Protein. He's lost 10lbs since I started the pre-op diet two weeks ago. Reading this made me feel good not because of the sex but because it solidified what I already knew - sex is hard work, and can be embarassing for a bigger guy. It's not just me. It's both of us. Now he says he wants to be as sexy for me as I will be for him. We've become closer. So, the sleeve can do as much good for healthy relationships as it can tear apart the unhealthy ones.

I really wanted to reply to this. Yes, sex is a LOT of work for a big guy. Ladies, all due respect, but most of the time, sex is all about US doing the work -- abs and core, legs, arms. If you're out of shape, as a guy, sex can absolutely destroy your stamina, and let's face it -- collapsing like a pile of Jello halfway through just ain't sexy. So we try REALLY hard to please y'all, but when you're that heavy, it just ain't going to happen!

Add to this the fact that fat converts testosterone to estrogen (yes, estrogen. Look up lipid aromatization for proof...) and you see a real "double whammy" for us guys emerging; not only are we expected to be nearly machine-like in our movements, with no reaction to the sheer strain and stress of moving 250, 300, 400 pounds of flesh around (not counting the lady!), but our testosterone can dip so low that we have a hard time keeping an erection (and what THAT means, ladies, is that ANY distraction can make "it" go away -- slowing the rhythm, changing position, even just worrying that "oh god, I'm gonna lose it!" And when you're panting and wheezing and worried about having a heart attack (yes, contrary to urban legend, people can and do regularly have heart attacks or strokes during sex), that's a pretty serious distraction. So, for a heavy guy, sex really ain't much FUN! We want to do it to keep our lady friends happy, and sure, it FEELS good, but it also feels like we're gonna die, it's a race against the clock with whether Mr. Happy will keep playing along, and a lot of times those negatives outweigh (heh) the positives.

Now, switch to skinny sex. My muscles are MORE than capable of hauling my carcass around and doing ALL sorts of interesting positional things. Sure, I sweat and breathe hard in the throes of passion, but my heart and lungs are healthy and I have a ton of stamina, so I'm not worried some artery is going to explode. And best of all, because my testosterone MORE THAN DOUBLED without drugs, just by losing the weight, my libido is crazy -- that one hormone makes ALL the difference between just being caught up in my head and worrying about how I'm going to "perform" and getting utterly, absolutely lost in the moment. And that is so insanely sexy. Apparently for both of us!

So yes, ladies, if you want a better love life, definitely lose weight, but get your guy to lose weight too. You will NOT regret it!

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    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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