On my pre op diet for the 2 nd time. Had to reschedule my surgery because after day 7 of 10 the first time, I had a complete mental/ hunger/ emotional/ scared as hell someone is going to cut off half my stomach breakdown. I cried, i felt like a complete failure, i yelled at my husband for helping me "do this to myself." Then i ate and felt worse, emotionally. It's been a month since then and I cant stop thinking about the surgery. I keep telling myself that people do the surgery all the time and I will be fine, but though I have rescheduled my surgery and am doing the pre op diet again, I'm not sure that I am convinced that my MENTAL status will be OK (even though the shrink says im fine and it's natural to be scared)I'm on day 2 for the second time and really trying my absolute hardest Not to have another breakdown. Has this happened to anyone? If so, how did you get through it? I'm scared! Any words of advise/encouragement is really appreciated. I really just need someone to be strait up with me. please and thank you.

I did not have to do this twice, but I can understand your fear because I completely went through that. I was scared to death of surgery!! I almost walked out of the hospital the morning of surgery. I had to literally make myself put one foot in front of the other to go in. The funny thing was that afterward I realized it was so easy! They give you meds to make you calm when you get in there. One minute they are rolling you into the OR, then next they are waking you up to tell you are done and did great! All the things I feared or worried about were for nothing.

Okay, so now you are on day two of pre-op. Your shrink said there is nothing wrong with you mentally, so now it is just time to power through it. Here's what I did to help. I wrote down all the reasons I hated being fat. All the emotional tolls, all the practical things like having nothing that fits, etc., and all the scary health things that go with being overweight. It was a really long list. Then I wrote down all the things I was looking forward to being a healthier weight like keeping up with my kids, climing stairs, shopping in the regular stores, riding rollercoasters, etc. Also a very long list. Whenever I got scared or things got tough. I went back and read the list. It really helped keep me on track. Keep busy with other things during pre-op diet to keep your mind off food and your pending surgery. Go for walks, go do something fun with your husband, read a book, watch the Olympics, go to work etc. The first four days of pre-op diet are the hardest because your body is protesting the lack of sugar and carbs. Once those are out of your system, you stop craving them! Just keep reminding yourself that this is only a finite period of time. Once you have your surgery, you will no longer be hungry!!

It's going to be OKAY. You CAN DO THIS and YOU ARE WORTH IT! Hang in there and I will pray for you to successfully get through this and conquer your fears. Good luck and keep us posted.

Surgery is a scary thing. It's scary for all of us here. Do not feel bad about being afraid, anyone not afraid is either insanely brave or stupid =p I'm not sure which.

Have you tried making a list of reasons you want the surgery? Posting a picture of you before you gained weight on the fridge? Writing positive statements and posting them? All these things could help when you're feeling like you're going to lose control. Or when you're feeling panic, go for a walk and try and work through each feeling.

I had another forumgoer suggest to me pre-surgery to write out all the possible outcomes and how I would handle them. That way no matter what happened, I had a plan. It did help cut down my anxiety some.

I hope that you feel better. You are worth this, and I know you can get through it.

Wow! You ladies are awesome! Thank you so much!

Your post brought several things to mind...interesting that when we look at the surgical piece of the puzzle, it can seem very scary, and in the past, I have felt that feeling, 24 years ago I had gallbladder surgery and even though I had 3 previous c-sections I had anxiety about being opened up, it somehow seemed almost barbaric to me. Of course I went forward with the surgery and I really needed it because I had gallstones that were causing me intense episodes of pain.

When I read your words about why you would "do this to yourself", I take it you mean have the surgeon remove most of your stomach tissue.....isn't it interesting that we don't see where we are before weight loss as a grave condition that needs attention. I have asked myself silently many times, before I started this weight loss journey, how I could have "done this to myself"? The difference is that this surgery is to HELP us return to good health. I told my primary that I wanted the surgery, but thought it was a radical procedure, that I had some fear going forward with Kaiser Weight Loss program, she turned to me and said, "Don't let the surgery scare you, because frankly, if you don't do something to change, you will probably be in this hospital having surgery for another reason." That drove it home. Morbidly obese is just that, and when I would read the laundry list of conditions that increased the likelihood of heart attack, stroke or diabetes for women, I had already checked off most of the things on that list. I was headed in the wrong direction for DECADES.

This was my chance to do something PROACTIVE and irreversable for MY HEALTH.

I have never regretted this decision for one moment, and I hope you will come to see your own upcoming surgery the same way, embracing your ability to turn your life around.

Good Luck in whatever decision you make. You can do this!!