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Feeling Out Of Place While Shopping



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Basically, right now, I'm in between Plus and Regular Size clothes. I am trying not to buy much until I'm at or closer to goal, but being a professional, I need some key pieces that aren't too big, especially pants. I do not want to look sloppy at work. I feel so out of place shopping in the regular section. I feel like people are looking at me like "IMPOSTER.....get back to your department." Okay, maybe not that extreme, but you get the point.

Will I ever overcome this?

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I don't know if you'll overcome it, but you stated how I feel about clothes shopping very well. I keep waiting on security to come and drag me, kicking and screaming, back to the plus size section! :)

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I am sure that you will. And as someone that is only 2 weeks out, I can tell you that I can't wait until I can be a regular size. I am a size 24. My favorite store to shop is Target, but their plus size section seems so marginalized. On a little corner, with so little options. Cheer up!!!! You are right there where a lot of us would love to be!! And it is only going to get better for you.

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OMG! I always feel like that! My wife (any other gay sleevers out there?) is small - at the time of our wedding she was a size 2. Great thing about the lesbian relationship is being able to clothes shop and shoe shop with your beloved without the grousing. :) I felt like every time we went into JCrew or the Gap, people would think I didn't belong there and were staring at me. It made me hate shopping - I'd find a comfy husband chair and sit outside and wait for her. Now that she's pregnant, when we go maternity shopping I think the sales people think *I'm* the pregnant one!

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I worked in a nice retail clothing chain throughout college and I can tell you that you would have to be wayyyyyy out of your size range for a salesperson to even blink about what section you are browsing in. People come in all different shapes and sizes so I never stopped being surprised whose butt fit into which size of pants! Even then, you could be shopping as a gift for someone else. Being able to fit a pinky toe into regular sizes is a huge accomplishment - keep your head held high. You belong there!!

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:-) At the end of the school year, I went summer-clothes shopping and actually burst into tears in Penney's because I felt so disoriented--I knew exactly where to go for "my" clothes--the women's department, duh, and Lane Bryant, and Avenue--in these "new" stores, it seemed there were so many choices, and I had no idea what size I wore or how to find anything! I had a little melt-down.

At that time, i was just about a year out from surgery. I was almost used to being at my goal weight, and I was almost used to NOT being "the fat one." I can tell you that in three short months of summer, somehow I have blown right into "YAY!! I can shop anywhere, anytime, for anything!!!!" and it's a fantastic feeling! YES you will get past that discomfort. YES you will learn your "new" body and its sizes and what looks best, and YES it will be FUN.

This is a HUGE deal for me--I, too, have to dress professionally for work, and I always dreaded trying to find appropriate plus-size clothes (I wore 26/28 prior to surgery) that didn't look like tents.... SO difficult! And I used to sweat so much during hot weather or when I got hot working (I'm a conductor, so a pretty physical occupation) that my clothing also had to not look gross when dripping wet--another layer of complexity. Now all those problems have been solved--I rarely break a sweat any more, even in this HORRID south Louisiana heat and humidity, plus I can wear button-up blouses without worrying about a clothing "malfunction." Oh yeah, you'll get used to it!

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I can totally relate. Happened to me when I was a size 16/18. Now I am a 12 (single digits come soon pls!! ) and shopping in regular stores. It feels awesome to have some many choices but I still feel weird and I feel that people are staring at me thinking fat girl get out of our store. I know it's my mind playing tricks on me. It hasn't gotten use to the idea that we are not that size anymore. Congrats!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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