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Emotional And Freaking Out



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Merry Christmas to all.

I am sitting here while everyone else is asleep and thinking. My family and I had a wonderful Christmas. It has been one of the best ever. However, this afternoon it struck me that I will be in surgery in 3 days. I thought I was dealing well, but I just broke down and started crying. My dh reminded me of how much better I will feel in 6 months. That was great b/c it wasn't how much better I'd look but he's right it is for my health that I am doing this and the perk is how I will look. I don't know what is wrong with me, but I am literally freaking out and crying. It's like I'm scared to lose weight. How can this be. I've wanted to lose weight for years. I've been thin before. Just about 8 years ago. I know how great it was (although I didn't know then). So why am I all of a sudden scared. I have been contemplating surgery for 2 years and now it is finally happening. What is wrong with me?

I'm not sure of what I am looking for in this post. Like I said I'm just sitting here crying and freaking out. Since everyone is asleep I just needed to tell someone......

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Don't worry, what you are feeling is completely normal! Im three weeks post op and went through the same thing even though I had wanted to be sleeved. Its almost like our minds go through a fear of the unknown. It gets better. Keep on trucking, I promise after everything is said and done, you'll feel much better. Take care and good luck.

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Melissa-

I am sure your feelings are very common, so don't feel bad for having them. I had my first anxiety today as well and I have 2 weeks to go. It is the beginning of a big change in life and change is scary. Even great change is uncomfortable and the reality of it is hitting you. I bet you will feel better tomorrow. This process is an emotional roller coaster for all of us.

Be kind to yourself. It's going to be just fine. :)

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Most of us have to go over so many hurdles for this surgery. Mine took six months. Psychiatrist, counselor, diet doctor, lose 5% of weight, wait on insurance, and then when the surgery date was scheduled, it was like it took me by surprise! Maybe I didn't think it was really going to happen or something.

I was sleeved last week, and I got very upset in the pre-op waiting room. They had to give me valium. I was considering pulling my IV out and bolting. Because of the valium I made it through.

I was so afraid I wouldn't be able to take the pain, or that life would be horrid afterward. I don't know why. It IS a huge step though, and I think you are normal for having last minute concerns and doubts. Also, our mind is going to tell us at the last minute that we can do this on our own, without surgery. I think it is just fear, it was in my case.

I think you are being normal. Try not to think about it too terribly much, if you can help it. That's what I did during the time leading up to surgery. I waited until I was at the hospital to lose it!

Good luck to you. In about a week you'll likely be typing away from home, well on the mend! Well, maybe a few gas pains left over.

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I freaked out a little bit yesterday too. The fact that I wrote out what was going on and posted it on here already made me feel a little better. Great replies will come from others who have already gone through what we are going through now. I am going to try and just relax my mind over the next few weeks with yoga and some other relaxation exercises. Feel proud that you have the surgery in only a few days. I would say do your best to relax your mind so that it will be that much less stressful for you when you get to the hospital. We decided to have this surgery for good reasons, and those reasons still exist. I still catch myself saying I can do it on my own, but then I remind myself how the last 15+ years of trying to do it on my own haven't led to any long-term successes. This will be a great opportunity to actually change my life for the healthier.

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I was where you are now one year ago. I had just had a wonderful Christmas with family, and knew I would be facing surgery soon. I wondered if I would be around to see another Christmas - I was scared to undergo surgery and thought I would die young (relatively) if I didn't have it.

Fast forward to now. I have been sleeved 10 months and am within 10 pounds of goal. I have lost a small person's worth of weight. I am SO MUCH healthier and feell SO MUCH better. And, I really enjoy being this size! Life is much better at a 10 - 12 petite than a 24W.

Try to focus on the end goal. Don't let anything you can think or worry about keep you from focusing on your end goal. Anything you have to do, eat, not eat, start doing, stop doing or change is worth reaching your end goal.

I wish you the best of luck on your journey.

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Thank you all so much. I know it is just my anxiety getting the best of me. Beyond the nerves, I am excited to see what I look like in a year and the energy I will have. I also can't wait to be able to play with my kids without being so exhausted all the time. The 28th can't get here fast enough and it is getting here too fast.... :)

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The three month process for me was filled with an inner peace because of my decision to have this surgery. Then I finally got the ok from insurance and I had a total melt down that night. It was a lot going through me mind. The unknown is scary! I cried so bad that night my sister held me and let me soak the front of her shirt! I even cried as they wheeled me into the operating room a little. It's okay to be scared and nervous- but don't let it scare you away. Today I am three weeks post op and down twenty-seven pounds since surgery! I would do it all over again in a heartbeat!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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      1. This update has no replies.
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