Cold Feet

[smithjo 0]

Hi everyone. I'm scheduled for surgery in three short weeks, Dec. 1st. and suddenly having all kinds of anxiety about the whole thing. I realize this is common, but it's keeping me awake nights. I didn't get any sleep at all last night. After going through all of the waiting, the meetings and appointments I should be happy that it's finally happening, but I just feel a sense of uneasiness and dread. I'm wondering how in the world this can be a sane thing to do! I'm afraid I'll regret getting most of my stomach cut out, and I worry there might be some long term problems that aren't known yet. I really thought I could do this, and I'm pretty surprised that I'm reacting this way. Maybe if I could get some sleep things would look different, but I don't know.

[BZButterfly79 19]

Hi, you definitely should not undergo any surgical life altering procedure without being sure that it is what you want, for me resolution of cold feet came easy, I said:"If I don't have this procedure what is my alternative?" I had the last seven years of hell run through my mind and the dieting and unhealthy self-medicating relationship with food, shortening my life, heading towards diabetes and a hundred other things, it became clear to me then, but hang out here often I am here looking for support and I sure want to be here to support other like myself. I've got the same fears as you frequently I think of bone problems there is always something you know. Good luck keep us posted. My dancing man up there is happy for you that you have a "date" I am still waiting to see the doc. Oh and sleep...you don't just need it you DESERVE it.

[YORKSHIRE GIRL ANGE 1]

Hi there, I'm Angela joining you from the UK. My surgery is a week after yours on Dec 7th.

I do keep getting the odd flash of " What am I doing ? " this is permanant no going back.

Do you know what, I just think to myself what would you rather do ?

A ) Stay fat and risk ending up with a long list of co-morbidities ( I have none at all right now, goodness knows how I've missed them after spending my whole life abusing my body with food.) Carry on for the rest of my life with my weight going up and down because, although I can loose some, I always end up putting it back on again and then some ! I also can't bear the thought of having to have someone take care of me in later years purely because of weight related issues that will crop up.

OR ............

B ) Take advantage of this wonderful opportunity to help put an end to this cycle for once and for all.

I know it isn't going to be easy for us, it isn't magic and we'll have to work hard at it. Just think though, how many times have we struggled to loose the weight only to end up feeling a total failure, in your own and everyone else's eyes, when it does go back on ?

I also read, read and better read the posts on this site from everyone who has been there and come out the other side. The inspiration I find and the advice the members give is absolutely priceless and I am truely greatful that I happened upon the site, purely by chance.

Try to think positive, do yourself a list of pros & cons and I'll bet I know which list comes out longest !!

I have to start my pre-op milk based diet next week for 3 weeks (yeuch !!! ) really looking forward to that !!! LOL

Keep in touch and GOOD LUCK for the 1st

Best wishes Angela x

[thinoneday 445]

Hi there! Well the best thing for cold feet is to put on socks! It's normal to have the jitters. This was my 18th major surgery and i should have been ok with it, but got the jitters anyways. . . It's normal. . but like butterfly said you really should be mentally ready for the surgery, if your even having the slightest doubt you might want to rethink what your doing. . good luck in your decisions.

[M2G 1,836]

I agree that what you are experiencing is most likely normal. I also thought about the alternatives. The yo-yo dieting is just as unhealthy as staying morbidly obese (in my case that is I qualified as) and while I also had no co-morbidities, I definitely felt like it was a matter of time before I developed some. I'm great at losing weight, it was the keeping it off that never seemed to work for me.

I guess the way I looked at it was the benefits of HAVING surgery, outweighed the risks and possible "what ifs" in the future.

I'm so thankful everyday that I was given a tool to help me get to a healthy weight and stay there.

Having said all that, it truly comes down to your own soul-searching and the only one who can answer the question as to whether or not you are ready to make this change in your life, is you.

[lisabug 10]

I am with you. My surgery is Dec 1st also. I feel a lot less anxiety now since I met with my nut yesterday to go over my post op diet. She gave me a shopping list broke down by the week. Once I actually saw what I'll need to do and when, I have a lot less anxiety. It finely hit me that my stomach is still going to function just will not be able to eat as much. It is scary thinking about the surgery, but it is scarier for me not to see my girls grow up. With my family history if I do not lose the weight I am destined to have diabetes and to have open heart surgery.

Try to concentrate on the positives, not the surgery. Of course there are risks, but being obese is a higher risk.

[MINI-Me 196]

As others have said, you are perfectly normal in your anxiety. What you need to determine is what you want to do. Is this normal anxiety or are you really having second thoughts?

I was completely gung ho for the procedure until I met with the nut. She kept talking about "you'll never be able to ..." and "you will have to give up ...". I was like "Wait a minute ... is this right for me?"

It was a good wake up call & I did some serious soul searching. And, I realized that yes, it was right for me. And the things she told me "I could never"??? I talked with my doctor and he was very realistic - 90% do what I tell you and 10% splurge. That's what I've been doing & I've surpassed my 135 pound goal that my Nut and Pysch said was unrealistic and that I was setting myself up for failure.

Lesson Learned - Only YOU KNOW YOU and what YOU ARE CAPABLE OF!

Best of luck making your decision. For me? It was a life-saving decision and I have 0 regrets.

[smithjo 0]

Hey, thanks everybody for your encouragement! I took a nice nap, and am definitely feeling better. It's crazy, I've done all I can think of to do to prepare, and most of the time I'm just so grateful that I have the opportunity to get this surgery. It's the niggling self-doubts and anxiety that will creep in sometimes in the wee hours that I'm battling right now. Whew, I hope I can just keep my head on straight for the next few weeks! I'm so glad to be able to vent to folks who are or have been where I'm at. Thanks a lot!

[Lila21 36]

Hi there,

I am in the same boat as you are, and I think it's really helpful to keep checking with this forum. I'm having surgery in 5 weeks and I am scared, nervous and excited all at the same time. I think it's one of those things where you have to get through a lot of anxiety. Part of how I reassure myself is reading the comments of long time sleevers. These folks feel really happy with their decision, and many had great answers for the fears I've been having (read my post "Did anyone else have this fear" for the answers to my fears about removing 85% of my stomach.) Feel free to write me directly if you need a pep talk! It's just around the corner!

[myrori 55]

I am getting sleeved on Nov 23, my anxiety comes in the form of dreams. When the doubts creep up, I remind myself that I have to do this, blood pressure, back pain pre diabetic. I do not want what my parents ended up with.

[ginnylee 4]

Hi everyone. I'm scheduled for surgery in three short weeks, Dec. 1st. and suddenly having all kinds of anxiety about the whole thing. I realize this is common, but it's keeping me awake nights. I didn't get any sleep at all last night. After going through all of the waiting, the meetings and appointments I should be happy that it's finally happening, but I just feel a sense of uneasiness and dread. I'm wondering how in the world this can be a sane thing to do! I'm afraid I'll regret getting most of my stomach cut out, and I worry there might be some long term problems that aren't known yet. I really thought I could do this, and I'm pretty surprised that I'm reacting this way. Maybe if I could get some sleep things would look different, but I don't know.

I know just what you are going through. I couldn't sleep or if I did I would wake up in the middle of the night in just sheer terror about what I was doing. As others have said you must do this for yourself and if it doesn't feel right then you probably should rethink having the surgery. Having said that, recently I was talking with a lady at the hospital during my pre-admission (my surgery is Monday, Nov. 15th) about I still wasn't sure that I was really ready to go through with the surgery. She asked me if I had tried other ways to lose weight and of course I have. She then told me "then be at peace with your decision." I thought about her statement for 2 days and continued to weigh in my mind if this is really what I should do. After 2 days of thinking and praying I realized I am at peace with my decision. Today I can hardly wait to for Monday to get here.

Hopefully, you will feel better about your decision.

[smithjo 0]

That about sizes it up, doesn't it? I know I have tried just about every other way to lose weight, even lost significant amounts a couple of times only to gain it back plus more. I have proven to myself that the diet and exercise alone approach doesn't work for me. I can't afford to keep playing around with it. I'm ready to take this step and lose all my excess weight and keep if off for good. My body and my soul will benefit and I'm at peace with my decision. Thanks everybody!