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I am getting discouraged...



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I am freshly 24 and have been overweight for as long as i can remember. I belong to a family of emotional eaters! I'm sure that many of you know exactly what I am talking about when I say those words! Bad day? Ice Cream! Good say? Ice Cream! Holidays and birthdays are planned solely with food in mind! I have told myself over the years that I am happy with who I am and what I look like, but as the years pass I realize this just isn't the case! Diets never work, and a life style change is in order! I finally made the decision that surgery is what it will take for me to be successful in losing and keeping the weight off. Earlier this year I started doing lots of research on weight loss surgeries and found that the only one my insurance covered was Gastric Bypass. Thinking it was the logical option i went ahead and started the process of getting it done. In July my mom and I attended a seminar that is required to get the ball rolling. I started the 6 months of dieting and seeing a nutritionist weekly that my insurance requires for approval. 1 month into dieting my gallbladder had to be removed because of a stone. When this was done everything changed!! The doctor that performed the removal found an interesting surprise when he got inside! (He also nicked something and I spent a week in the hospital for a bile leak!!) My intestines never rotated when i was a baby, so large is on one side of my belly and small on the other! How did I not know this after being alive for 24 years!!! So the gastric bypass just seemed like more complications going into it than I was comfortable with! Now here is where it gets interesting! During my stay in the hospital a doctor from the same office was filling in for mine and stopped by to check on me. In my family we call this one a "god thing" because this man just so happened to be a weight loss surgeon and was working with a hospital, that is actually closer to my home, on a low cost plan for the sleeve procedure! He explained more about my intestines and how the sleeve would just be more practical! Lots of research, phone calls, and doctors appointments later and I am so very close to being able to have this surgery. The only problem is, and it's a pretty big one, I can't find a co-signer who has enough good credit for me to get the full amount needed! I feel like i have worked so hard to get to this point, I have lost 10 pounds on the diet that the doc suggested I be on to soften my liver! I know that I need this surgery, but there have been so many set backs on this journey that I am starting to wonder if this is just not meant to be! I am so sorry this has been an extremely long post, but I needed to get it all out and hope that someone has some words of encouragement!! Thank you for reading!

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God will provide when the time is right. I can only imagine how frustrating it must be to have to go through all that, but have faith, and know that God will make a way. It may not be on your timeline, but give it to God and let him work out the details.

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You just hang in there. I was in the same boat with money. Horrible credit and no way to get a loan. I felt like I would always be the one sitting back envying everyone else while I just continued to keep getting fatter. One thing I've found out. Where there is a will, there is a way. It may seem hopeless now, but dont give up. Just keep fighting and keep working towards it. I'm 10 days away from my sleeve now and I'm so excited! Ask for help from people that you are "sure" wouldn't or couldn't help. You might be surprised.

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How much money are you talking about? Have you considered going to Mexico where cost are cheaper. Some insurance companies will pay out of network expenses at half price and if the surgery cost way less down there that might be a way of saving money. I was self pay and paid $9000 for mine. I used $5000 of medical flex spend account and was able to save the $4000 by moving in with friends and cutting cost by not eating out, dropped the cable, etc. I saved the $4000 in about 8 months. I was able to borrow for the $5000 as the lender knew the flex spend would be approved immediately after i submitted the bill from the surgery. So I was able to take the flex spend money and pay off the loan within a week of getting the surgery. Some people refinance their home or car loans. hope this gives you some hints.

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Thanks everyone! Unfortunately Mexico is completely out of the question! The cost I'm looking at is 12,000. i have been approved through 2 different medical loans for 8,000. So i only lack 3,000. The drama comes in because my parents can't co-sign and I only have 1 living grandparent that has signed for me on things before and I don't think it would be a problem only my dad won't let me ask her and it has been 2 weeks since I asked him to! He for some reason will not ask her and i am getting to the point where i am going to ask myself. i dont have a great relationship with my dad anyways, so its not like i will be losing out by stepping over him on this one!

*BTW* If she could just co-sign on ONE loan for the whole amount i would be looking at a lot less interest than 3 separate loans! But i will take what i can get!

Edited by hope4204

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Why is Mexico out of the question.

You could get it done for 9500 from one of the best bariatric surgeons available.Dr. Aceves has done most of our surgeries and not one of us has any complaints with him or the hospital he practices out of.

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Good luck Hope, I sincerely hope all works out for you in the end. . . and what ever happens, happens. . things have a funny way of working out in the end. . .

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It would be nice if the insurance companies were forward thinkers who understood that an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure!! If you get the sleeve at this age, it will likely prevent the inevitable complications of obesity down the road. They would save so much money if the prevented diabetes and high blood pressure which inevitably develop very expensive complications. I'm sorry you are having such a hard time. Good luck - your life will change.

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Oregondaisy- I am not against going to Mexico, but it is not possible right now. I was in a horrible car accident 5 years ago and can't travel until next fall.

janep- that is exactly why i am doing all this now while i am young. both my grandfathers died because they were over weight and very unhealthy. massive heart attack for one, and stroke that left the other paralyzed for 10 years before he died from the complications.

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Oregondaisy- I am not against going to Mexico, but it is not possible right now. I was in a horrible car accident 5 years ago and can't travel until next fall.

I am very sorry to hear that.

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I used to work for a bariatric surgeon. One thing I will say about going to Mexico for surgery, is that often times, the surgeons here at home in the USA, will charge a lot more to see a patient for follow up care afterward than they would if you just had your surgery done by them. It ends up costing so much more in the long run because you DO need the follow up care. Whether it be for complications, or for maintenance you do really need a bariatric doctor to follow up with. You might get lucky and find one that doesn't charge more for treating patients who got WLS in Mexico, but its kinda few and far between. I would say, weigh out the costs, the actual costs for treatment down the road before deciding definitely on surgery out of the country.

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1. Delay is not denial.

2. At 24 years old, you are grown enough to talk to whomever you want to. Two things you will find out about weight loss surgery is that it will expose the dynamics of your relationships, and the closer you get to goal the bolder and more confident you get - more able to speak up and advocate for yourself.

I hope this works out for you soon. In the meantime, eat lots of Protein and eat it first, then non-starchy veggies, then a little fruit. Drink Water until your eyeballs float and don't become part of the couch.

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I used to work for a bariatric surgeon. One thing I will say about going to Mexico for surgery, is that often times, the surgeons here at home in the USA, will charge a lot more to see a patient for follow up care afterward than they would if you just had your surgery done by them. It ends up costing so much more in the long run because you DO need the follow up care. Whether it be for complications, or for maintenance you do really need a bariatric doctor to follow up with. You might get lucky and find one that doesn't charge more for treating patients who got WLS in Mexico, but its kinda few and far between. I would say, weigh out the costs, the actual costs for treatment down the road before deciding definitely on surgery out of the country.

Fortunately, I haven't met any of those kinds of doctors. I had surgery in Mexico, and have had excellent "regular priced" followup care from my PCP and gastroenterologist. And really, the only surgery related followup I've needed in the last year is bloodwork...don't need a bariatric specialist for that. The gastro got involved over a non-surgical issue, and he could care less if I had surgery in Mexico. In fact, he supported my choice of getting WLS despite it not being covered by my insurance. He said it was obvious my surgeon knew what he was doing and was impressed with the results.

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