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What not to say to somebody who is getting a band...



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Guess I'm not as brave as you guys are , except maybe rn2 wn. Only my daughter knows and my husband. I just did not want people looking at me and asking "how much" or giving me their opinion . I figure it is none of their business (even my Mom and brothers, sis in laws, etc) I know in time the questions will come but it won't be like all the crap some of you have to put up with!

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Ada you are my kinda gal, that is terrific, I have got a m-I-l like that too!

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When my mom realized I was now wearing clothes 3 sizes smaller than she wears' date=' her response was "oh great, now I'm the fattest one in the family"

Geesh!![/quote']

Wow! What a snarky comment! Dare I ask if you replied to your mom?

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"Your face is soooo skinny" - Thanks I am glad I could shrink my beach ball head down for you.

I know it was not meant to be insulting at all but it amazing how people speak without thinking.

Omg, that made me literally LOL! Beachball head! Ha! Love it

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I love the "ooooooooooohhhhhhh...." Very knowing look when they find out you have the lapband followed by "my aunt/brother/mother/neighbor/coworker got it and they are still fat." Thank you for your support.
I hate that one! Ugh!

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i had to laugh at all the posts here cause can relate so much to many of them. dad is the weight police, mom still trying to shove food down me cause she misses her eating partner, sister still in competition and has turned to bulimia to catch up, other sister is awesome and sends me a shipment of new clothes at least once a month (i'm like her new dress up doll, lol!).

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i had to laugh at all the posts here cause can relate so much to many of them. dad is the weight police' date=' mom still trying to shove food down me cause she misses her eating partner, sister still in competition and has turned to bulimia to catch up, other sister is awesome and sends me a shipment of new clothes at least once a month (i'm like her new dress up doll, lol!).[/quote']

Give that one sister my address. I'll be someone's dress up doll. I love clothes! Lol

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Are you sick? My friend just died from, (whipsered) cancer!

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Reading through this certainly brightened my afternoon! Like many of you, I did not tell many people at all what I was doing. Wife, kids, boss. I wanted the boss to know mostly because of the number of pre and post op appointments I knew I would have to have. My coworkers who had to know I would be out of the office just knew I was having a 'minor procedure'. I am actually glad that in addition to the band, I had a hernia repair. Now when they are asking me post surgery how I am doing (and you know most of them are dying to ask you what your 'procedure' was for!) I can legitimately tell them it was for a hernia repair, and I am not technically lying! Then they can be supportive in wishing me well in my recovery from surgery, but we don't have to get into the whole other part of what I am going through.

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How's this one for a laugh...I did a facial side by side comparison. Showed it to what I thought was a very caring loving girlfriend. Her comment on the picture...THAt doesn't EVEN look like the same person does it? I just said no...but inside I was breaking down... YES.I.am.the .very.same.person.inside.! UGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

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A supposedly good friend told me why don't you try to lose weight on your own first?" HELLO!! I've been trying to lose for 35 years! I didn't just wake up one day and decide to have major surgery on a whim!

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A supposedly good friend told me why don't you try to lose weight on your own first?" HELLO!! I've been trying to lose for 35 years! I didn't just wake up one day and decide to have major surgery on a whim!

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    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
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    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
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    • BeanitoDiego

      Some days I feel like an infiltrator... I'm participating in society as a "thin" person. They have no idea that I haven't always been one of them! 🤣
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    • ChunkCat

      Thank you everyone for your well wishes! I totally forgot I wrote an update here... I'm one week post op today. I gained 15 lbs in water weight overnight because they had to give me tons of fluids to bring my BP up after surgery! I stayed one night in the hospital. Everything has been fine except I seem to have picked up a bug while I was there and I've been running a low grade fever, coughing, and a sore throat. So I've been hydrating well and sleeping a ton. So far the Covid tests are negative.
      I haven't been able to advance my diet past purees. Everything I eat other than tofu makes me choke and feels like trying to swallow rocks. They warned me it would get worse before it gets better, so lets hope this is all normal. I have my follow up on Monday so we'll see. Living on shakes and soup again is not fun. I had enough of them the first time!! LOL 
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    • BeanitoDiego

      Still purging all of the larger clothing. This morning, a shirt that I ADORED wearing ended up on top. Hard to let it go, but it was also hard to let go of those habits that also no longer serve my highest good. Onward and upward!
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