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Are You Going To Tell Anyone About Your Surgery???



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I've told a few people that I'm doing a strict liquid diet for a month as a boost, and then joining Weight Watchers...

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considering the fact that I have had zero fills, it's not a lie that i'm watching what i eat and getting more exercize. i have no restriction, so i am pretty much doing this the old fashioned way. no need to tell people i also have a band. for me, just having to get that band put in was enough to tell me that i needed to make a change. i don't need the fills at this time because the surgery was a head change for me. i don't think i will ever tell anyone unless they just come out and ask me point blank if i've had it done. but so far, no one has said anything.

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My Nutrionist cautioned me about thinking twice who I tell. She said she found that some people's co-workers and families were too judgemental about weight loss surgery and caused some additional stress. I did tell my immediate family members (parents, spouse, children and CLOSE friends). I did NOT tell any of my coworkers. She suggested when people ask you how you lost weight to tell them you are eating less . . . which is true. GOOD LUCK :)

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im very big and ive told everyone,most of em have been very curious and ill answer them,i am a lil scared of failure but ppl think what they want anyways i just want them to know i am trying and thats what counts

I agree. I dont care what people think. I have lost weight and gained it back so many times and was alwasy ashamed of failing in front of people. Then I realized something very important, those people dont care about me and i dont care what they think. I promise as i approach 40 years old, i get this attitude. None of those people were there for me whne I was struggling, so i honestly could care less about trying to be accountable to them. This is about me!!!

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In the beginning I told close friends and relatives because they all had to put up with me while I was on my 2 wk pre surg liquid diet.... then as the weight started coming off and I found myself telling more people than I expected to.... Today when I see someone I havent seen in a while and they see me as an almost thin person and ask what type of diet I am on I tend to tell them the truth.... 1000-1200 calories per day.... and we really never get to the did you have surgery question. However if I feel I can help someone by telling them... I do volunteer the info.

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This has been a question I was wondering too as I get further along in the process and hoping to have surgery the beginning of June. I have told my husband (obviously) and my best friend. Thats it. I don't think I will tell even my mom whom I share everything with at this point. She has always been a tough one with my weight and I think she will expect me to drop very quickly and will be always questioning my eating and what I do. I may tell her with time, I may not. I will be honest that I am turning a new leaf in my life and starting to put myself first and think about my health in a new way.... we are all doing that.... we are all going out on a new adventure... maybe it is a solo one or a whole group party but we are all in the drivers seat this time..... ;)

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I only told one person that had a lapband. My husband doesn't even know. Mainly because I know my family and friends wouldn't understand my struggle. I was obese but even my friend that knows thinks that I am crazy for getting it done because she fels the surgery is for he morbide obese. I feel I would have been morBidely obese in 5 years if I did not have the surgery.

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I'm not telling anyone until the insurance approves it. Then I will tell my mom and one of my sisters and swear her to secrecy. When I get to my goal I may tell others, but only if they ask. I used to be one of the people who thought that getting WLS was taking the "easy" way out, but I realized that is far from the truth. From all the research I've done, I gather that the band requires hard work with watching what I eat and exercise. I commend you guys and dolls who have reached your goals and continue to fight for your health daily. I agonized over my decision for two years and I'm finally at the point where I'm sure. I did not ask one person in my life for advice because ultimately I am the one who must live with my decision for better or for worse.

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A few family (parents and siblings, one grandparent) know. I haven't told any friends. I had to call off a trip because it's in the time period I expect to be having surgery and told my friends I was getting wisdom teeth removed! I'll probably tell a couple of them eventually. I am by far the largest of my friends and I don't see them understanding.

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I can see that I'm in the minority here. I am not a very private person and it doesn't feel right to me to keep my upcoming band a secret. I am approved and scheduled for May 21. I had to ask for advanced sick leave so I had to tell my direct supervisor. I had to ask my other supervisor to follow a different procedure for one of my employees who finishes a testing period two days before my surgery so I told him too. Both were very supportive and disclosed that they formerly struggled with weight too. I need a colleague to cover for me while I'm out so he will need to know and my employees (scientists) will die of curiosity. I've shared other things with them before and I see no reason not to share this. I expect support and will deal with any negativity gently but firmly. I told my mom and siblings and siblings-in-law and all have been supportive. I cannot wait to get started with my band.

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I've told whoever, doesnt matter to me. My coworkers and I are close like family. And because we're like family, they know I have no problem telling them exactly where to get off with the police stuff, and will hug them the next day. Boundaries... I have them. I also see it as an opportunity to do well and let someone else see me do well. Maybe I'll be able to help someone else....

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I only told one person that had a lapband. My husband doesn't even know. Mainly because I know my family and friends wouldn't understand my struggle. I was obese but even my friend that knows thinks that I am crazy for getting it done because she fels the surgery is for he morbide obese. I feel I would have been morBidely obese in 5 years if I did not have the surgery.

Just a question...how were you able to have the surgery and not tell your husband? I know that I was very sore and had to ask my husband for help lifting things. Besides...I know that I made horrible faces as I tried to get up and down those first frew days.

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I wondered the same, how did you keep it from your husband??

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I had my surgery on a Friday. Saturday morning he went to work and I was sick with a cold - slept on the couch that entire weekend because I really was sick. By Monday I was as good as new :: a lot of drugs - but good as new. I had to hide it so I could not walk in front of him nor my daughter for 2 days. It was difficult; but I pulled it off and they have no clue to this day.

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If y'all have a group of create a group please let mr know so I can join. Thanx in advance

About a face book group: I just made a new Facebook name etc and I use it specifically for my wls. It's great just to let it all out and be open in a community of like minded people. If you are interested in friending me I'm Sweetie Karma. And we know how fb goes. You will have tons of peeps on there. Most of my friends are wls specific. Good luck all of you new banders. My surgery was march 1

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    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
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    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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