Ok family.... it's the morning of surgery and as I sit here at 6:20 AM EST, I think about, of course dying. What a morbid subject. I mean I watch my 2 year old son sleeping in his crib and I couldn't imagine not seeing his face ever again. Tears are brimming my eyes as we speak. And as I blink them back, I tell myself that only less than 1% die from this surgery. I have over a 99% chance of coming home tomorrow. I have a greater chance dying on the way to the hospital or on the way back or a couple of weeks from now from god knows what. Ok. No more talk of dying.

I'm gaining a new life here. I still don't feel nervous so don't take that rant above as nervousness. Just reality checking. However, the real reality of the situation is that I weight approx. 320 lbs at 24 years old. I have a 2 year old, and a husband of going on 3 years now. I want more kids!! well atleast 1 more will do. I want a daughter. I want to finish school, I want to earn more money. So the bigger picture here is not dying, but what I have to live for. My hopes and dreams, my goals and aspirations. If I only concentrate on dying, how can I see those things through? How did I become so pessimistic all of a sudden. Probably from listening to my husband, he is the president of the Pessimistic states of Pessimistica. :haha: Yea I know humor this early in the morning, from me? Who knew. Anyway, I will take the optimistic traits of my fellow bandsters and role models. I will not let this get me down, I too will lose 100 lbs or more at my 2 year bandversary. I will look great, feel great and great things are only accomplished from a great attitude. Isn't that great? OK, OK. I guess I'm done ranting and raving. I'll see you guys on the loser side. I will update as soon as we get home on Saturday. And as I approach this fork in the road, I will take the lighter side toward a new me, and leave that dark half behind right where it belongs.

:love:

Marcelle

Hey Marcelle, I think we all have the "what the heck did I do to myself" phase that we go through. I had mine on the 3rd and 4th day. When we feel better I'm sure we'll feel better about it as well. Good luck!

I'm so glad things went well for you and that you're home and recuperating. It will just get better from here on out. Congratulations on going through with it...you'll be so glad you did.

Emily

Marcelle! Congratulations! Joy had her anxiety attack about the 5th day. Tell your DH to be ready for the phone call. LOL I'm looking forward to seeing a lot less of both of you....

Best of luck with your surgery, the road to recovery, and the wonderful road to "a lesser you"! It'll all be worth it in the end, and your road will be a longer one for it!

So happy to hear everything went ok for you. And I had that sinking feeling of OMG what have I done about a week after surgery. It will pass and as you start seeing your weightloss you'll have answered your own question of why??!

Hey Marcelle, I'm glad to hear that you're home and recovering. Best of luck on a speedy recovery.

Hey Marcelle, I have my surgery tomorrow morning. I am sooo terrified. Just knowing you came through it ok has calmed me and made me so happy. I'm glad you're doing well.

Sunta?! Tomorrow! Yay!! I'll be thinking of you! Be excited, not nervous. You'll do just fine and we'll be waiting to hear from you when you get home, to give you a big weclome to bandland cheer.

Happy that all went well for you, Marcella! Grats on your band!