Well, I just spent 2 weeks in Seattle with my sister, 2 brothers and my mom. I have always been the smallest of the family, in every respect. I am the shortest, have the smallest feet, smallest hands, weigh the least, everything!!

Anyway, I was so judgemental of my entire family!!! I had to really get a grip on myself before I said something ugly. I sat and watched as my sister ate a very large chicken breast in 3 bites, then proceded to eat my chichen breast, because I took my 2 bandster sized bites and could not eat anymore, she then ate my veggies, my potatoes,my salad, and then went back for seconds, and thirds...This was at her sons rehershal dinner for his wedding, Anyway I realized how much my family eats and why we are all so fat!! It has nothing to do with heridity other than the fact that we all have the same disease, unable to put the darn fork down and walk away from the food!!

At one point I was actually embarrased and not for my sister, but for my kids and what I must have put them through all these years and they were not even there to see this side of their mother!!

My sister has been telling me how much weight she has lost and how skinny she has gotten, she still weighs close to 300lbs and eats enough for 10 people!!!!

Now that I am banded I find myself being overly observent of how much food people eat and what kind. Does everyone do that?? Or am I just overly sensitive??

OK just needed to get this off my chest. Thanks for letting me ramble about my family who eats enough to feed a small country in africa..:omg:

BTW, I do love my family, I was just shocked that I had never noticed this side of them before now...

I too believe in the nature PLUS nurture theory. And although I may not agree with everything someone else says, I don't believe we need to attack anyone for the way they feel. My brothers and sister were all thin and I was put in the back row with the boys in my kindergarten picture because of my size. And the rest of my life and behaviors, I'm sure, didn't help things any.

I also believe it has to do with both. I come from a very large family, both in numbers and in girth. Coming from such a large family (13 kids) money was tight so meals were very heavy in the carbs. My family is very carb addicted. So did that make me what I am today or is it the genetics, Im not sure but I know it didnt help any.

ok guys, I did not intend to start a war here over genetics...

this was just an observation on my part..I had always believed i was 'destined' to be fat because everyone in my family, on bioth sides, was..the point I was attempting to make was that FOR ME i realized it is not genetics that has aused my siblings t be fat.....it is their disease of not stopping the food train from the fork to the mouth and how much I noticed it this visit!!! The scary thing for me is the fact that untill May I was EXACTLY the same way.

Thanks you to Jessica, my patient who told me about the band!!!

Now that I am banded I find myself being overly observent of how much food people eat and what kind. Does everyone do that?? Or am I just overly sensitive??

>>>>>>>>>>No your not. I was always this way. I despised glutony and I was always noticing others who ate like you described and telling myself how glad I was that I wasnt that way, I didnt understand. I also felt it was so unfair, cuz these gluttons were like 250 pounds and here I am at 400 pounds.

If anyone has read my pre band food habits, you might think I am being a hiprocrite... I'm not.

I was obsessed in many ways and I overate tons of crap. BUt I did it in small doses.

I also was very paranoid about looking like a pig, or getting food on me, or eating in front of people.

So.. when I saw 250 pound families, frying batches of chicken in oil and making sausage, eggs, biscuits and gravy EVERY morning and shoving HUGE sausage dogs in their mouths.... driving around with hourds of food all over their car and by their beds and own like three fridgerators and freezers and bring enough Snacks to a pick nic or outing to feed the entire neighborhood..... They can eat whole pizzas, a box of donuts, and order two bigmacs from fast food before they go home and make the ritchual dinner, you get the idea.

I am NOT saying that type of family is any better or worse than mine... I had different kinds of problems, BUt at the time I didnt see how bad my problems were.

I compared my self to that kind of family or eater all the time to make myself look better, to feel sorry for myself and to keep the denial that my eating habits were the cause of my 400 pounds.

Sometimes I still think this way. All THEy had to do was STOP drinking the whole milk, (I drank skim) never use oil again (I never did) and substitute some low sugar and low fat foods (I was already doing) AND they would lose Soooooo much weight! I wished it was so easy for me..

I would look at my One dollar plain cheeseburger and my milk.. and look at my cousins Whopper and fries, my sons two Famous stars, their dads 10 tacos.. and FEEEL life was so unfair.

I almost never finished a meal at a resturant in one sitting, I never heaped my buffet over and over like so many normal people, I never ate more than 4 slices of pizza in my life, I didnt sit down with a carton of ice cream and a spoon.. etc ect..

(I did drink a gallon of milk a day, but I was in denial about that, IT WASNT FOOD! lol)

ANYWAY...

As I keep my food journals.. I see that I can take in a ton of calories whether I eat that way or not.

BANDED.. I guess I COULD still eat a little cheeseburger (at night)

But I wouldnt be able to drink (not alchohal) and drinking is NUMBER ONE.

WHAT AM I TRYING TO SAY?

I think this:

I am as gluttoness and a freak of nature as those I tend to judge..

I drink milk and juice by the gallon, THATS SERIOUSLY strange.

I need to stop trying to tell myself that I am better somehow.. or excempt from responsibilty for my obesity..

sometimes I do that wiht the band because of how easily I have gave up foods, HELLO.. I am better, I AM ADDICTED TO MILK AND JUICE IS ALL.

grrrrr, I am having emotions.. last few days

OH..

I did my technical writing report in college on "Pregnancy and subsequent obesity"...

I was searching for the answer to why I went from 135 to 335 in a few years and NEVER EVER EVER cold get rid of it..

LIKE MY fat didnt follow science.

I do still think the sudden gain messed me up alittle, but not so much that It was impossible to lose.