Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

To Tell Or Not To Tell About Lap Band ???



Recommended Posts

I hope so because I am scared sh*tless lol.

Thank you. My fiancé and family are VERY supportive as well as my fiancé's family. That is all I need. And you are absolutely right. I think she does have a drinking problem and I really do distance my self from her and the other negative people in my life. Life is too short! Congrats to you and your husband! You two will be so happy!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've been pretty selective about who I've told. I work with a know-it-all idiot who has already stated that the LapBand is the worst type of diet. If she knew I was having the surgery, she would be spreading it around our high school campus so fast. Only 3 people on my campus know I'm doing it, and I'm hoping that one of them (the administrator who I report to) hasn't said anything to the idiot. It's hard enough working with this person, but this will definitely put me to the test.

My young, physically fit daughter's comment was "why don't you just eat better". I haven't told my son yet (they're 27 and 30). Thank goodness my husband is incredibly supportive - love him!!!

Surgery is mid-Feb, so I'm pretty sure my weight loss will be noticeable by the end of the school year. I say - let them wonder how I'm looking so good!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I told everyone. I told complete strangers. I'm not saying this has to be what you do, but my decision to do that was for two reasons:

1) it made me accountable. I wasn't going to fail. And I certainly wasn't going to fail if there were a tonne of people watching me.

2) for those who were struggling with their own weight demons, I never wanted to perpetuate to them the myth that ALL you have to do is watch what you eat and exercise more, and it would make you thin. Or that it was what made ME thin. I couldn't do this without the lapband. I wanted others to know that.

So I told everyone, I blogged, I updated FB, I posted progress pics, and every now and then I still come to this website, though most days I forget I have a lapband now. I don't regret telling anyone, even the haters, coz in the end, I had the last laugh, didn't i?

ETA: one of the best things though about telling people is that the lapband went from being 'oh it doesn't work' or 'it's the easy way out' to 'holy crap, it does work' and 'wow, she works out and is fitter than most people'. I alsoI had a tonne of people I knew, who had had WLS, come out of the woodwork to start talking to each other and supporting each other, especially where I worked. I like that I helped dispel the negativity around WLS. It was a side effect that I didn't think of but am grateful for.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've only told my sisters and my parents know since my dad is funding it. I'm sure eventuallynword will get out to friends. I may tell 1 or 2 friends so they won't constantly question me. I want to keep it on the down low mostly because I don't want unnecessary pressure and questions.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

For me its "Keep It Simple". Meaning, I only tell people who sees me without clothes on. Trust me, its not that many. LOL!! Its a personal journey. Tell only when its a need to know situation.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have been pretty private with the decision to have the Lapband. My husband, parents, sister and best friend were all that knew I was even thinking about it, and other than a co-worker, know that I am having it done in February. I own a two-family home, and my brother and sister in-law live downstairs, and who are both very overweight. We always joke about out weight and out horrible eating habits, but she has noticed that I have had a lot of appointments lately, and have changed my usually over-eating ways. I am very close with my sister in-law, and I want to tell her, but I am afraid of what her reaction will be. She could either be really supportive? Or she can be kinda negative, or even worse compete with me and go for it too. She always said she felt like we were always so close because we are heavy. I don't want that anymore, ya know? Am I making sense?

At work, I am a teacher surrounded by men and women who are tiny. I am very tall and very overweight. I would love to have someone to talk to about this in the lunch room, or have them stop asking if I want another chocolate. They won't understand, and I just feel like this is so private for me still. Anyone else feel that way? That is such a private thing that they don't want people to know about? sad.gif

I have only told my best friend, not even my husband. She and I have shared ups and downs for over 30 years and she is so excited for me. I think she will do it if I'm successful. I just don't think it's anyone else's business! I will tell my hubby when it is actually scheduled and he will support me. But this is something I'm doing for my health and I just want to have it be 'mine'.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I told a few co-workers and my immediate family. I too was worried about a couple of extended judgmental family members. However, I did find that when I was asked directly if I was losing weight, I answered honestly. When asked how I was doing it, again I couldn't just say, exercise and high Protein diet. It felt sort of dishonest. So I answered honestly and inevitably got into a conversation about the LapBand. I think I should be a spokesperson. :) There is only one person I have not told. And like you, it is a tricky situation. I have a friend (best friend through school) who is overweight and has done everything under the sun to lose weight. She has spent thousands of dollars and not gotten much in the results category. We visited last year (prior to my surgery) and my stepmom went to dinner with us. My step mom was one month post surgery for gastric bypass. I can't tell you how much I heard about the dangers, etc.. from my friend. She thinks she knows all the answers. I decided then not to say anything about my decision to have Lap Band to her. She lives out of state and we see each other once a year. Maybe a year from now, when I am happier with myself, I will feel comfortable defending my decision. Until then she will remain in the dark.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Good luck with your Feb surgery! I just wanted to add a little thought. I imagine for a lot of us, making this decision took a lot of strength, and personally I think it is a stepping stone towards learning to love yourself better (better love better you!) and because of that I feel its important to remember the priority is you right now. I agree with mgmagnolia, your sis in law might feel threatened and react negatively but depending on personalities she might soon be inspired by you and support your journey.

I had to tell my boss, and when my surgery date was confirmed I told some other colleagues because Id rather be openly discussing it and raising awareness than wonder if ppl are whispering their guesses about my weight loss over coffee.. Ive told my husband and daughters and two girlfriends who have been lovely and supportive. Ive decided I wont tell my family because they would only have negative things to say and would belittle any success. I feel I deserve to make that choice regardless of how I might be judged if they later found out, and I hope you feel as comfortable with your decision.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Mr.Kantos

      Just signed up. Feeling optimistic.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Frugal

      Welcome to Frugal Testing, where we are committed to revolutionizing the software testing landscape with our efficient and affordable solutions. As a pioneering company in this field, we understand the challenges faced by startups, small to medium-sized businesses and any organization working without budget constraints. Our mission is to deliver top-notch testing services that ensure the highest quality of software, all while keeping your costs in check.
      Frugal Testing offers a comprehensive suite of testing services tailored to meet diverse needs. Specializing in different types of testing including functional testing, automation testing, metaverse testing and D365 testing, we cover all bases to guarantee thorough software quality assurance. Our approach is not just about identifying bugs; it's about ensuring a seamless and superior user experience.
      Innovation is at the heart of what we do. By integrating the latest tools and technologies, many of which are cutting-edge open source solutions, we stay ahead in delivering efficient and effective testing services. This approach allows us to provide exceptional quality testing without the high costs typically associated with advanced testing methodologies.
      Understanding each client's unique needs is fundamental to our service delivery. At Frugal Testing, the focus is on creating customized testing strategies that align with specific business goals and budget requirements. This client-centric approach ensures that every testing solution is not only effective but also fully aligned with the client's objectives.
      Our team is our greatest asset. Composed of skilled professionals who are experts in the latest testing techniques and technologies, they bring dedication, expertise and a commitment to excellence in every project. This expertise ensures that our client’s software not only meets but often exceeds the highest standards of quality and performance.
      Frugal Testing is more than just a service provider; we are a partner in your success. With a blend of quality, innovation and cost-effectiveness, we are here to help you navigate the complexities of software testing, ensuring your product stands out in today's competitive market. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • ChunkCat

      I have no clue where to upload this, so I'll put it here. This is pre-op vs the morning of my 6 month appointment! In office I weight 232, that's 88 lbs down since my highest weight, 75 lbs since my surgery weight! I can't believe this jacket fit... I am smaller now than the last time I was this size which the surgeon found really amusing. He's happy with where I am in my weight loss and estimates I'll be around 200 lbs by my 1 year anniversary! My lowest weight as an adult is 195, so that's pretty damn exciting to think I'll be near that at a year. Everything from there will be unknown territory!!

      · 3 replies
      1. AmberFL

        You look amazing!!! 😻 you have been killing it!

      2. NickelChip

        Congratulations! You're making excellent progress and looking amazing!

      3. BabySpoons

        So proud of you Cat. Getting into those smaller size clothes is half the fun isn't it?. Keep up the good work!!!!

    • BeanitoDiego

      I changed my profile image to a molecule of protein. Why? Because I am certain that it saved my life.
      · 1 reply
      1. BabySpoons

        That's brilliant! You've done amazing!! I should probably think about changing my profile picture at some point. Mine is the doll from Squid Games. Ironically the whole premise of the show is about dodging death. We've both done that...

    • eclarke

      Two years out. Lost 120 , regained 5 lbs. Recently has a bout of Norovirus, lost 7 pounds in two days. Now my stomach feels like it did right after my surgery. Sore, sensitive to even water.  Anyone out there have a similar experience?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×