Hi ,

My surgery is on Monday and I'm starting to freak out !!!

I went shopping today for post op necessities and it finally HIT ME - I'm actually doing this - my life is going to completely change.

Then I felt my eyes swell up with tears and I had to calm myself down . I began to think- (looking down into shopping cart at tons of fluids) is this all I will be able to have for the first two weeks?? How am I going to do this??!! What if something goes wrong ?? What if I FAIL ??!!!

I'm soo nervous that I've been eating like crazy the past few days (no pre op diet) - as if doomsday is approaching.

I know deep down that I need to do this - for ME - but I feel really sad. Is this normal??

Its like I'm sad that I'm going thru with this - I guess cause it means that I finally have to admit that I can't do it by myself . Its as if I feel ashamed :0/

Uggghhh sorry guys - needed to vent - any words of wisdom would be very appreciated

Teary eyed & Scared in NY

:'0/

Keep your eye on the prize and don't let negative thoughts take over.

I know what you mean as far as being really scared but anytime you feel overwhelmed just have a motto they you say to yourself a mantra if you will.

Your life will completely change- food won't be the focus of it anymore and that's a good thing.

Failure is NOT an option- sometimes you might get off-track but you'll need to redirect yourself. Make a shift in your thinking.

You said you are admitting that you can't do this yourself- but you are doing it yourself- you are taking control of your life and catapulting it in the right direction.

Remember to keep your eye on the prize and don't get distraction by the what-ifs.

I think it's completely normal. i had to do a 2 week pre-op diet and when i was shopping for all of those Protein shakes and fluids for my first 10 days post op, i had a breakdown in the store. i had to go to the bathroom and compose myself. my surgery was on wednesday, just a couple of days ago. i'm glad that i had to do the pre-op diet, even though i moaned about it, because it prepared me a little bit for what was to come. at this particular moment, i have ZERO interest in food at all. i can barely drink enough liquid, and am coming nowhere near the 64 oz i'm supposed to drink just because it's too much Fluid right now. i am hoping that it will get easier and easier.

i too went through the eating everything in sight phase. i felt like i was on death row and i was having lots of last meals. i needed to do that, and i'm glad i did. i don't regret it. hopefully in about 20 more days, i'll be able to have solid food again, but for now, i'm just going to try to do what my doctor has told me to do. get all of my fluids in and try to get better. good luck with whatever you decide to do.

I find this to be very inspiring- have positive quote taped around your mirror and around your house!

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing Enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

— Marianne Williamson (A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of a Course in Miracles)