The first time I heard about lapband surgery was from a dear sweet

lady named Theresa passing through my life--leaving behind in her

wake--a hope that things could change for me. I did look up the

surgery then--but my insurance didn't cover any part of it--and self

pay in this area was so high--it was unthinkable for me--even with

the changes I now know it brings. So--a few months later--I was on

the path to gastric bypass--which my insurance does cover--ever more

nervous and getting more frightened as I heard first one then many

side affects/risks--which I had to decide if I was willing to take

for the drastic change I needed to make in my life if I was to live

to see my small children grow. My history with surgeries and

complications being as it was--I was VERY sceptical of the numbers I

was given--I know that some of it was just to filter the serious

from those who were not--but 1/50 was a number that really made me

uneasy--as the other times in my life the numbers game showed my in

my favor i.e. 1/500 or 1/300--and I still ended up being that 1

percent with complications.

I know we all go through a tremedous amount of inner turmoil in

making decisions that can affect the length and scope of our lives.

Many thoughts and fears, hopes, and dreams. I was no different--

and I had hit that moment in my life where It was do something--or

be lost to myself. I am sure that if I had gotten through it--I

might have had another of those moments...we all come to our own

crossroads--this was mine. I decided to look up the lap band

procedure one more time. This time--I really started digging--and

comparing for me--which one would give me what I needed most--as

well as be affordable for us. Comparing what I could--researching

where I could--I looked more deeply into all of it--obsessively (my

husband's word). I finally found a dr with terrific credentials at a

more affordable rate for me to handle--which I needed if I was going

to self pay-(another story there believe me).

I had more than a week of sleepless nights (not unusual for me anyway) thinking of the hope--and the chance lap band could give me--and finally told my husband--this is it. He said to give him some time--so we could

figure out the finance part of it--lol problem there is once I came

to the conclusion that this was it--there was really no stopping me--

I gave him 4 days--then called and booked my appt for 2 weeks out.

He had that long to figure out how we could pay for it. When I told

him that I booked the appt--he laughed--he thought I was kidding. I

had never been more serious. Healthy and young still at 30--even at

my weight--I was starting to have more issues with joints, and been

warned of pre-diabetes--I could see the road ahead of me with out

some action. I had dieted and lost 60, 80 lbs more than once--only

to have them return and bring friends--over and over for the past

decade or more. I have been heavy since the onset of puberty--

progressively more so at I get older--I just couldn't let it keep

happening--this is where it had to stop.

I started the liquid liver shrinking diet the day I booked the appt--

and promptly lost all control--like some switch was flicked in my

brain or something--eating a bag of doritos-and whatever else I

could get my hands on that day and the next. I finally got a hold on

myself the third day and managed to stick to the pre-op diet losing

12.5lbs by the day before my surgery.

I spent every one of those days researching on the yahoo boards--

asking questions of all of the post banded people who woould answer

and reading every post along the way--finding that others often

asked questions I hadn't thought of yet--but was glad to know the

answers to. When I got to TJ--I was nervous--but exceedingly well

informed on what to expect, and everything went very smoothly. I met

up with 3 other women having the surgery and their support--I had

also arranged to bring with me a very dear person for support. So

we all shared info and stories and got to know one another through

that first day while we all went to pre-op testing and checked into

the hotel for the night before surgery (included 3 nights in the

price for the surgery), we all got to enjoy a really super "last

supper" as we thought then at a restaurant called 'los arcos'

MMMMMMMM yummy!

and we met with the surgeon and his team for question time and

basically for them to explain more on what to expect. I found it

funny almost to learn that I had already gleaned in my research most

of what they had to say--and after meeting with them and finding out

what order the surgeries for the next day would be in--we were free

to do as we pleased--in this case--we all met in the restaurant of

the hotel to chat some more--I found myself being able to field a

lot of the questions that some of the others still had--ironicly

enough. (told you I am obsessive--lol) The next day--we had

surgery and everything went very quicly--I woke up after surgery to

some nausea--and sipped some water and slept a lot. The next day--I

walked to the pharmacy to pick up my prescription and then it was

off to the airport to fly home. My friend made sure to get a

wheelchair for me--which I didn't think I needed but by the time we

got across the airport I was thankful for--and I was pre-boarded on

the plane for the 2 hr flight home. I spent the evening at home--

resting as much as possible. The next day--I drove my friend the 7

hours home, and spent the rest of the week with my daughters (2 and

4) up at her house--chasing littles and visitiing with family.

Drinking fluids--Not so easy since everytime my family gathers--

there is a barbeque--lol.

I progressed well for the first six weeks--my appetite returning

with a vengeance after the first week--and struggling to eat like a

bandster should and not always winning the battle. By 6 weeks out--I was SOOOO ready for my first fill--1.5cc--I was disappointed in myself because I had only managed to lose 10lbs (actually 20 but with no restriction--gained 10 of it back by the first fill) but determined that this was going to work.

I had very little restriction still--but forwarned is forearmed--I

knew there was a possibility that it would take 3 or more fills to

get there--that was part of my choice in picking the band--and that

I REALLY needed to work on my patience--gee wonder why that was so

hard--I know that it took years to get to this point--what made me

think I could change it all overnight?

So, as soon as a second fill was allowed I was there! I managed to lose 3 lbs between my first and 2nd fills. But after that second one--I felt the restriction--not immediately--it actually kicked into high gear about a week

later--and by this third fill I got--I had lost another 15 lbs! Now

I am losing steadily and happily. I have continued to live on the

support boards, and exercising (yes--you guessed it--almost

obsessively--mostly walking 4x a week for at least an hour)

So that is my story--basically anyhow-I left out the depression I

was going through before, and the bandster blues after as I mourned

food, (and wanting to throw my hubby from the 2nd floor window

because he just didn't understand what I was going through--bandster

rage--it passed--lol)--he never knew that part until yesterday--you should have seen the look on his face when I laughingly told him he narrowly missed a few broken bones at the least.(it really was a true ally mcbeal moment)

-I am sure there are people making the same decision I had to make

here on this board--and others in other places on a daily basis--I

can only say--ASK QUESTIONS! Be proactive--don't settle for what you

can get if you really want something else. You are worthy, and

smart and should be proud of yourselves for making a choice to take

your life into your own hands and make it happier and healthier and

longer than ever.

I, for one, would not go back for an instant! If anyone wants to ask

questions--please feel free to email me I am by far not the most

experienced person on the board--but I am here:). Whatever your

choice--it is YOUR choice--and you make the best of it. I wish

everyone well in their journey--and reasearch.

Hugs,

shrina

7/12/05 Dr. Kuri

274/226/125-150

3 fills Dr. McKeen 2.4cc currently

Thanks for telling your story...I am sure you provided support and inspiration to someone, just stopping by these boards, who is making the same decision! Congratulations on your great progress! Cindy

Excellent post. Congratulations and keep up the good work!!

Shrina, what a fantastic story. CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR SUCCESS! This post really meant alot to me because i'm struggling with the fear that I will go through the blues. It's so good to know that it happens and it passes. Not so worried now for friday to get here. Thank you.

I really appreciated you taking the time to share this story. It makes me feel more secure when people are honest about the emotional aspect of the surgery and the inability to eat again after the surgery. When others totally bypass that aspect it makes me wonder if I am too food-happy to be successful. Then again, I think we all overeat and do so in a big way or we wouldn't be here to begin with.

Thank you again.

boy you got that right--lol I am not sure others so much pass that part over as when we get past it--there are so many other things going on that we have to deal with that we almost forget it--if that makes any sense. I wrote about it here both to remind myself--and to encourage others who are just coming into that part of things--I don't want anyone to be disillusioned by expecting the band to *fix* everything for us. It won't fix it--but it does help--once its finally adjusted right that is.

happy journey--and glad my posting helped a little thats what I hoped for--

thank you so much for sharing your story. I am so discouraged because of gaining some of the weight back. I hope i will also have a happy ending like you!