Its her 3rd day of her pre-op diet and I wouldn't stop at Mcdonalds for her, so she could get some fries. Everyone else I know cheated on their diet she said.:thumbup:

Sorry to say but I did not cheat on pre-op or at all since my band. It was so hard at first but now I don't even think about it, I feel to good!

You were trying to look out for her. Plus french fries from McDonald's isn't included in a pre-op diet. I used to be obsessed with McDonald's. Now I think it's one of many reasons why Americans are so fat.

I am very new here, but feel qualified to address your comment. I have fought a war, completed graduate school been a parent and this is the hardest thing I have ever done. I was honest and followed everything they have asked me to do, I am 4 days post op.Why would I do anything else? This is not for the weak or faint hearted. I know I am new at this and I may well stumble myself on my journey.I mean no disrespect to you or your wife. I would question her commitment to the surgery at this point. If one does not follow the advice layed out, it is well documented in these pages the pitfalls the WILL occur. Maybe she needs to postpone her surgery whilst she contemplates her options. I say this only because of the troubles that will undoubtedly follow by deviation from the blueprint layed out. From my understanding, this is not a magic wand that will instantly make you thin, like anything else in life worth while, you have to work hard to attain it. If I were you, I would try and not get put in situations where you are made responsible for her behaviors, it will only bring added stress to an already stressful situation. It is not too late to halt the process so she can gather her thoughts. After all life is a journey, not a destination. I am sending good thoughts y'all's way.

You can not do this for her, and it is very very hard work. I agree with the above poster, I would check to see if she really understand the surgery and the requirements both before and after sugery. It is very hard work and requires commitment, everyone stumbles occasionally but that should be the exception not the rule. I had my surgery the last day of may and I am down 62 lbs, and I have had to fight for every one of those lbs, so if your wife is not dedicated to this, she will not be successful. I have a friend who was self pay, she did well initially but then started cheating, she had lost 70lbs but has now gained all but 10 or so back. How? Eating french fries and candy and other non healthy foods. I am not trying to be harsh, but this is a long road and you both need to be prepared to travel it. Best of luck to you.

I have a little bit of a different opinion... days 1,2 and 3 ARE by far the hardest in my opinion, when your body is going through heavy withdrawals from carbs and sugar. It is normal for her wanting what she did, and it was great that you stood up for what she committed to. It is also normal for her to get upset... she IS going through withdrawal and like any drug addict, she is going to have mood swings. They won't last forever!! Hang in there! I have already had my freakout on my DH and we got through it! You will too!

Bravo for being the shining knight in your fight WITH your wife for her health and well being!

Nope - I absolutely did not cheat on my 3 week pre-op diet. Not one lick, bite, nothing. I wanted my surgery to go as smoothly as possible, with no complications - so for me, it was worth it. It SUCKED - but it was worth it.

I hope she doesn't read any of this....I 100% agree with you kiwiluver. I told her if you can't make it 2 weeks without giving in, how are you going to make it after surgery. I do know its possible to gain weight by eating the wrong things. I do worry about how she'll handle it, because she does have poor eating habits, such as constant snacking of junk food.

And actually I was hungry when we drove by too, I could've easily stopped and gave in, but I myself am in the pre-op stages of the Lap Band. I'm just waiting on medical records and approval from our insurance.

You did the right thing and she needs to know the serious risks at hand if she has a hard time with the pre-op diet. With a large, fatty liver at the time of surgery, it is possible that the liver could be damaged. A friend of mine assists surgeons who preform these types of surgeries.

Best of luck!

You did the right thing!

I absolutely did not cheat on my 2 week pre-op diet. I am very glad for that....because it gave me strength to get though the even harder post-op diet! I am 8 days out and on a VERY strict post-op diet that has slowly incorporated Clear liquids, regular liquids, and now runny mushies.

If she cannot make it on her pre-op diet then you may have cause to worry about her post-op restrictions. It was explained to me that you have to stick to the food incorporation schedule or you may have issues with your brand new band.

Good luck to both you and your wife!

Another reason why I swear that McDonald's Fries are laced with CRACK. My husband and girls have been going there and I'm like "no thanks" each time they go through the drivethru but let me tell you - those damn fries smell GOOD.

I do know (because I used to work for the company that made their oil) that they add a special flavoring to their oil to make their fries taste better.

Hence, why I correlate it to crack.

And you did the right thing. I bet it was hard to tell her no. But, you're looking out for her. It's love - tough love, but love.

If she's acting like a petulant child, use the standard petulant child response: "If everyone else jumped off the Brooklyn Bridge, would you?"

Seriously. It matters not one whit to your wife's health if every single person on the planet other than her cheated on their preop diets. Their survival is not proof of safety. It's not a shield to protect her from the harm it might do to her.

It's time for her to start following the rules. There are an awful lot that travel along with the band, and now is as good a time as any to realize that they need to be followed.

:thumbup:First off, I would like to give you MEGA KUDOS for loving your wife so much that you were willing to push back against her craving, and not be an enabler. The world needs more men like you!

The cheating arguement is really more of a justification than anything else. I was on Medifast for a month preop, and managed to get through without deliberately cheating, nor have I cheated since. All along the way, I've seen the improvements in my heath that have made all the potholes in the road worthwhile. I certainly understand the desire for foods that we once were able to eat freely, but I'm convinced that part of the success on this journey is the determination that food must no longer control me...if I had gotten that squared away in my head long ago, I perhaps would never had needed the surgery.

Your wife is in the earliest days of her experience...and sometimes I think the early days are the worst. I hope she finds the courage to stick it out through the tough times, because the rewards for doing so are priceless.

She may not be thanking you right now, but in the end, she'll realize how lucky she is to have you to provide tough love when she needs it.

Best, Christine

You wrote "I hope she dosn't read any of this"....and you mentioned that you are preping for this journey as well. Well if she reads these boards then you have basically "outed" her.....put her business here without her permission. How will that make her feel? And what happens when you hit a road block? Do you want her on here airing it out...or do you want her loving support?

Mr. Mom, I am glad you are also on this journey. It may be harder than the rest of us with two of you doing this at the same time, although there could be some advantages. Best of luck to you and your wife.

HappyMom, I am jealous. I am on Clear liquids for two weeks. Today is my sixth day of broth, sugar free Jello, Vitamin Water Zero, Atkins shakes and 1 popsicle. I have had the plain yourgert, but it tastes like sour milk to me. I am not whining, I am happy with the results. I can fit into leather motorcycle coats I have paid 5-600 dollars for that have been on a hanger for years. My only real test will be tomorrow night at 8:00 PM EST, Yankees vs Red Sox. Opening Day, "Let's Go Red Sox" :bored: Stressful.

I'm going to come at this from a different angle. Your wife is an ADULT. You are her spouse, not her PARENT. This is her journey and other than expressing your opinion it is not your job to act as her guardian, gate-keeper, nanny or enabler. To battle one's weight and reach the decision to have surgery is tough enough. To accept that there will be pitfalls and stumbles along the way is to accept that one is human - to expect to be perfect and live in a world of "I never" is expecting too much of anyone.