First, some stats.

I'm 32 y/o guy. NY

pre-op wt 315

day of surg 295 (8/27/09)

first fill 11/3 273

second fill 2/5 265

current weight 259

My story.

Sometimes I think I'm kidding myself. Yes, I've lost weight. No, not at the rate i thought I would, but I refuse to feel negatively about my progress.....I lost 56 pounds!

But lately I dont feel so good....

Before my second fill last week, I could eat just about anything....and I was...and staying within the same 5 pounds or so....i went to the doctor and expressed my need for a fill, to provide more restriction, and he agreed...so off i went for my fill.

my new fill is tight! i dont feel its too tight, just tight enough to punish me for poor food choices. 1/2 a soft taco at taco bell had my head in a toilet for 30 min, and so did a slightly over sized sushi roll....(i remeber when they used to bring the big sushi boat over to our table, how excited I would get...those days are gone. i used to eat 4 or 5 tacos at TB......

My fitness level is the best its been in 10 years. While I am not doing any regimented weight lifting, I am addicted to nike plus and my ipod, and am currently running about 15 miles a week....and i feel great doing it. I chop firewood a few hours a week, and lately have been shoveling a lot of snow. (argg)

Last night as we went to sleep, my wife and I had one of our little talks. Although I have her full support, I feel a little weird about the things she said. I know that my lifestyle has def changed...im so much more active then i was.....and i eat so much less. my weight loss thus far has been so enjoyable....and i think, kinda easy. i watch what i eat and try to make the best decisions. I'm not on a diet, i just eat great food. i might have a cookie here and there, but it's never out of control. shes a little critical of the rate at which im losing...and im not happy about her saying that...(yes, i told her so)

My biggest problem is that i dont feel satisfied emotionally. I enjoy the compliments i get all day long (I'm a pharmacist and everyone sees me a lot.) Are you guys out there having a cookie here and there? I feel like I dont deprive myself of anything i really want to eat, because i feel justified given my running regimen, and given the fact that i can only have a small amount of what i choose to eat.

So I need someone to break it down for me phtlisophically. I need to get my wife to support me, without bringing me down...she wants me to lift weights, and i feel like i dont have time to without sacrificing my running....

I'm sorry if I rambled on.....thanks for the help!

-Bill

Sayville, NY

Your wife needs a attitude adjustment - she should be supposrtive and happy for the changes you have made and will continue to make - if my husband said something that made me feel they you do i would flip out.. crazy i tell you !!!

2 lbs a week is perfect - running is fabulous!!! I never exercised before this but i bought a gym membership 1 month ago and while i have not been in 3 days because of a horrible cold i was hitting it 5 days a week doing things i had never done, weights, eliptical.. and if i want a god damn cookie i have ONE!!!

im sorry, but your wife needs to look in the mirror and ask herself why she would say anything hurtful to with the progress you are making,, shame on her!

I am doing free weights 3x a week. I really, really, reallyreallyreally dont want anymore surgery and if I can do anything/everything I can to keep from having to have cosmetic surgery after I reach goal I am going to do it.

Great your doing weights but I hate to tell you that it will not prevent saggy skin. Unfortunatly there is nothing we can do about that. No excersise, no cream. I too am hopeing I will not need plastic surgery. However, I will have it if it's needed.

My boyfriend lost almost 200lbs an has no sagging skin. I am gonna go by what he tells me to do and that way I know I did everything in my power.

Did you really not read my post or did you just want to act like I said it was a sure thing?

I disagree on working out not helping sagging skin. That being said it also depends on your age and how long you have been overweight. I have had friends loose over 100 pounds and look amazing. I think working out does help tone, I have even seen it on myself work.

Hey Bill-

I read some of the other posts...I thought you were asking how you could get more support from your wife. I am not a psychiatrist...I just play one on TV (just kidding), but really, I know what you are dealing with. Your success is great, but not feeling completely supported...criticized even. I know that when I lose weight, some people start acting crazy. Whether they act jealous or irritated or annoyed, it's a very negative reaction. I think it comes down to the fact that you are changing and change can be very difficult. I think about how I would feel if my hubby started running and losing weight and eating less...it would throw me for a tail spin. I think I would be a little scared!

Focus on your feelings and if you are happy, just keep doing what you are doing. Want to lift weights? Lift weights. If you don't, then don't. If you are happy with your running...let it be. You are making progress and that is what your goal is.

Good luck!

Beth