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Irritated with my band tonight...



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8 days post op and up until today I was happy with being banded...but I cooked dinner tonight, fantastic spagetti (recipe is posted in food)with fresh italian bread...big mistake...made me resent my band tonight. I wanted it so badddddddddd...I was consumed with it. (those demons that Jack in always referring to.

Stomped around here madder than heck. I hid it from everybody, so I came here to vent. The thing is...I have to learn to deal with this, it is not like I can just stop cooking for my family. I know...just being childish and it is not like this stage is going to last forever. I did conquer it, had my Protein drink like I am suppossed to and now sipping my Water, like a good bandster would, should and could. Thanks for letting me vent!

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Keri - you are so not alone. I am on day 19 of my 23 days of post op full liquids and I think that all of my favorite dinners have been on the table in the past 19 days. My hubby did most of the cooking for the first 2 weeks and I swear he made everything I love. But we are strong and you are right - its not forever. But I tell you - I can smell pizza cooking 10 miles away now!

Keep up the good work,

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It isn't forever, it really isn't!!! Good for you for making it through and coming here to vent. Isn't it therapeutic?!!! You WILL taste the yummy foods again.

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Hurray!!! That's one for the good guy's. Well done, the pride you should allow yourself to feel should totally consume you right now. You've earned it and deserve it! WTG!!!

Cindy

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First, good on YOU for staying strong!! That is what will make you a good bandster down the road. Second, no food is EVER off limits to you. Getting that fatalistic thinking about "waaah, I can NEVER have it again" will get you nuts. You only didn't have it today. But that spaghetti is still in the world and can still be consumed at another, better, time. That kind of thinking always helps me. "Okay, I choose not to have that today but there may be another time where I will have it. It's not gone, it was just my choice".

Good luck with the fight. I'm waging a war with myself these days as well. Courage!!!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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