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My surgeon is an ass, now I'm discouraged

Yesterday I went to meet with the surgeon for my exam and to get my surgery scheduled. I started the program in February 08 and have been waiting almost 2 years for this. The first question he asks me? "So what has taken you so long?" I explain about my mental status and how unprepared I was to make the changes necessary and about school and not being able to come for my psych classes. Then I explain all about the life changes I've made, getting off sugar completely unless it's the naturally occurring sugar in fruit, my exercise regimen which is an hour or more a day, the diet that I'm following. Then he says "Well if you were doing all those things you would be losing weight faster." Excuse me? If I could lose weight fast I don't think I would need the surgery or even want it. He's looking at me like I'm lying about it and repeatedly keeps telling me that I need to change my lifestyle. I wanted to say to him. "I don't like you. I want a different surgeon." He also tried to give me all the reasons why bypass surgery would be better for me than banding even though the first thing i said was that I would never do bypass because I feel like it's too dangerous and it scares me and I don't want it. Pretty much everything he said to me was negative. Then at the end of my appt. my mom is asking him a question about her band that she had put in, in February and his reply? "You really want to have your healthy habits be a family thing, not just have everyone in your family have surgery." What the hell? Did that comment need to be made? No it' didn't. First of all my sister is a rail, she did not inherit the fat gene, my brother did but he's not fat because he works out all the time and my dad is just a little overweight in his old age. He had no right to say something so rude. Also the only reason my mom had her surgery so much sooner than me is because she lied to the bariatric psychiatrist, and used phentermine and Medifast to lose her pre-surgery weight. Also she never goes to the gym. I on the other had was completely honest with my bariatric psychiatrist who then asked me to go to additional classes, which actually really helped me and the way I look at food, and I am working on losing weight by exercising and eating correctly. Does he even understand how difficult that is for someone with horribly slow metabolism? I work out for an hour or more a day and eat mostly fruits, vegetables and proteins and am losing maybe one pound a week. It's very discouraging to me and I'm pretty tired. School starts August 24 and while I'm sad that my surgery won't be before then, I'm relieved to at least have it scheduled. It's frustrating because everyone else at Kaiser has been so nice to me and I feel like this guy shouldn't be a bariatric surgeon when he has an obvious distaste for fat people. I can't do anything more than what I've been doing and I'm not going to stop doing that. :wink2:

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Sorry to hear about this. I would be concerned about what after care is going to be like if this guy is already being so discouraging. The aftercare is an essential part of this. Is he going to be supportive and allow you to have the adjustments you need, when you need them?

Do you have any other options for doctors?

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Sorry to hear about this. I would be concerned about what after care is going to be like if this guy is already being so discouraging. The aftercare is an essential part of this. Is he going to be supportive and allow you to have the adjustments you need, when you need them?

Do you have any other options for doctors?

Fortunately for me this guy is just the surgeon. I have one f/u with him after surgery and then I follow up with the band fill MD. There are two other surgeons and I am thinking about calling and asking for the same surgeon that did my mom's surgery. But at the same time, I have my surgery date and don't have to deal with this guy too much, I just wish he hadn't been so rude to me. I will be filing a complaint against him with member services anyway so hopefully he'll maybe not be so mean to other patients.

If I could lose weight fast I don't think I would need the surgery or even want it.

The band won't do much to cause you to lose weight; to be honest, my weight loss about the same post-op as it was pre-. It will, however, train you in portion control, which will help you to lose weight on your own, and to avoid gaining it back later which is where many of us have the biggest problems, and why surgery is a good option for us.

If you're diabetic, I'd suggest bypass over band.

Bluestate girl,

I think you've got the right attitude about this. Surgeons are the fix-it men of the medical world. Most of them are savvy enough to know to be nice to their clientele, but others just want to get in there and get the job done. Your fill doc will be the important one ...have you met him?

Also, there are alot of surgeons who are not really interested in bariatrics but are doing it because either their hospital is pushing them to do it or they know how lucrative it can be. The motivation isn't important...but is he a good surgeon? He doesn't have to love fat people, but he does need to do his job well and treat us with respect.

Cindy

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