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Taking the Middle Road, Thanks to the Band
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jfc193 1 post
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beckymein1021 1 post
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plain 1 post
The situation was all too familiar. It was 11:00pm. Everyone else in the house was asleep. I was wide awake, at the computer with the television on in the background. Suddenly, I was hungry.
I had stayed within my limit of 900 - 1000 calories for the day. The old self defeating voices started singing in my head again. Another good day followed by a binge (as much as this is possible with the band) at night was at hand.
Only, last night I did something different. I measured myself half a cup of cooked Cereal with Water, about 70 calories, and ate it slowly. The feeling of hunger disappeared. I waited a while for the food to go down, and then I went to sleep.
This is an illustration of how my life is changing as a result of the band. Before the band, half a cup of anything wouldn't have filled the bottomless pit of my stomach. What ever I ate would have been the prelude to many trips to the fridge that evening. Instead, I was able to choose the middle road. Rather than let my hunger gnaw away at me, or rather than to succumb to the inevitable binge, I was able to do what "normal" people do: take the middle road. I was able to discern that I was hungry, eat to satisfy that need, feel sated, and move on to the next thing.
This is a victory over the all-or-nothing, perfectionistic thinking which has plagued me for most of my life. Either suck it in or blow it: that's what my mind tells me. The band gives me the limits, the feedback and the security I need so that I can approach food with a maturity and responsibility which I was never able to muster before.
Have you had similar experiences? How has the band fostered new behavior for you around food, allowing you to take the middle road, contending with situations which used to defeat and frustrate you?
Edited by bandpal