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How about "None of your Damn Business." I didn't have that problem at my job. I guess I just have that look like "You better not ask me anything personal." :cursing:

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It's hard for me to relate to people who want to keep this very private. I have been very open and upfront with everyone about this surgery.

there are Many reason for some to keep this private.

medical intervention, no matter what it is - should be personal & private, with HIPPA protection....make that intervention WLS & you'll have more opinions & advice that may not only be unsolicited but downright offensive.

i have kept this private & that of my husband being banded from everyone except my parents & brothers. hubby's family and our best friends have no idea. we agreed the moment we "shared" we no longer owned the journey the way we wanted to - so therefore, no questions - no foul.

to the OP - if your afforded PTO (paid time off) your HR nor your company has the right to know why - medical intervention at best is all they need to know.....wish you well!

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It really is a shame that anyone feels they have to keep this secret, but unfortunately not everybody is easy to deal with daily. My difficult person is my mother-in-law. She is so negative that I call her Eyore. What's worse, she tells everybody's business to everybody she meets -- whether they know you or not.

So for some people, it was easy enough to say I was just having a surgical procedure, and they left it at that. Some people don't know I had surgery at all. But For her, if I had a mystery surgery and then began losing weight, she'd probably tell everyone in town she suspects I have cancer. So I told her that my ibuprofen use last year due to a herniated disk caused an ulcer, and I needed to get it fixed. This also helped me explain why I was on a restricted diet of liquids and mushies for a while. I also needed her to watch the kids for the surgery, so I couldn't just not tell her about surgery at all.

I hate that I had to do that... I wish I could just share it with her, but life would be unbearable if I did tell her. She would bring it up at every family gathering where food was involved, pointing out how I can't eat this or that... et cetera.

Luckily though, my husband, mom, and two best friends that do know are sooooo loving and supportive of me. It makes up for it, I think.

However you handle it, do what's best for YOU!

I wish you lots of success!:cursing:

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Personally, I don't feel compelled to discuss my private matters with my employer. Hence, when I have medical issues, such as when I had an emergency hsterectomy and gallbladder surgery, I did not see any reason to tell my employer, other than I would be off work due to a medical condition, which is being treated by a doctor.

I don't discuss my health issues, my financial matters, or any information that is personal with my employer. Legally, my employer does not have the right to know this information.

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I am sorry that some of you have had such negative responses. I asked my HR director if the company covered it and within 30 minutes she had gotten the information and asked if I wanted to speak to some people in my company who've had lap banding. Although she would not release their names she asked if they could call me. I received calls from three employees...telling me about the procedure, recommending doctors, and being very supportive.

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I am sorry that some of you have had such negative responses. I asked my HR director if the company covered it and within 30 minutes she had gotten the information and asked if I wanted to speak to some people in my company who've had lap banding. Although she would not release their names she asked if they could call me. I received calls from three employees...telling me about the procedure, recommending doctors, and being very supportive.

Very nice! :cursing:

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I have made the decision to keep this surgery very private. I tested the waters with a few people and got very negative results, thus, knowing how I operate, I believe keeping this part of my journey private will be the right decision for me.

I am wondering what to tell work ( I know my HR people will know what the surgery is) - I had my gall bladder out in 2003, so I can't use that excuse. Is there another surgery that I could mention I had that won't need much explanation? I am not one to make up stories, but know that people will ask ( they are always more direct then I am).

What have any of you said you are doing or why you are out of work?

I said hiatal hernia repair as well. It is kind of a boring surgery in that there is nothing much for people to talk about. It is in the same location and no-one asked any more questions about it. Also, since it is stomach surgery, it makes sense you would be on a slightly modified diet. I never felt bad about saying this, because I did indeed have a hiatal hernia repaired.

However, like the others said . . . you don't have to say anything if you don't want to. I knew that if I didn't say anything it would cause people to ask even more question than they would otherwise.

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Hi There,

I am with you, I am going to keep it very very private. The only ones who will know are my husband and my mom and dad.

I get 2 weeks vacation so I plan to begin my vacation on the day of the surgery and try to not even let anyone know that I am having surgery at all.

Breanne

12/8/08 - Seminar at Lahey Clinic

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How about hernia repair?

I have told all about my plan, and thankfully have gotten no negative remarks. I am a nurse, maybe that's why??!? Who knows.

Good luck to you

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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