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the boyfriend update for those who wonder



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My boyfriend and I are doing a lot better. I am a frequent pot smoker. i do not tell people this because I feel they judge me. I don't know how any of you got through liquid diet without it. I mean getting high helps my stomach feel neutral when i'm starving. We made a resolution to quit smoking. We're moving to a different/ CLEANER place in 2 weeks. We also decided that he would take on more of the stress of bills being paid. I mean we share our money but I was making sure things were being done. I can't have that responsibility. I am not someone's mom. I'm 18 years old. i mean we have enough money to support our habbit and pay our bills. I just have really bad money anxiety. i have a big fear of not making it. But I told him, if i don't feel any different by the time we are living in our new place, than when we move, i'll move back to my parents.

I feel really good about it. i feel like because his smoking has gotten so heavy recently, we kind of just sit there and don't even talk anymore. So I believe quitting is the answer.

Sorry I didn't share about that before. Like I said, people judge.

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judgement is not our responsibility we are here to encourage and help you!

good for you for standing up for yourself and asking him to take some responsibility.

and good for you in trying to stop smoking.

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Hollie, take it from a person who's been there and done that. Being high when your young is great, but it only gets worse. The older you get the need becomes greater. Then there will be a time when you spend money you don't have to have it. Then if you get the rug jerked out from under you....oh shit! Take it from me, Don't waste anymore of your youth on drugs, it really isn't worth it. Life is MUCH better without that hang-up. It only took 20 years for me....25 for my husband....we both say if we knew what we know now, then we would have quit alot sooner. By the way, your doing GREAT!:cursing:

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Not to be negative nancy, but I don't know any men who can handle bills on their own.. :cursing:

(Not being ABLE to pay them, but actually PAYING them)

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Not to be negative nancy, but I don't know any men who can handle bills on their own.. :cursing:

(Not being ABLE to pay them, but actually PAYING them)

Oh Fairy you have not met mine then! I have never seen a bill. complete opposite of how my life was before him. I say can I get htis or that and it's sure or lets save or whatever its so nice.

Hollie it sounds like you too will be just fine. You're young though so you can expect alot more life changing events to come.. You just have to work through them.

I wish you the best of luck.

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It sounds like you are making a good choice :0).

I am surprised that smoking makes your stomach feel neutral. Most people seem to be ravenously hungry afterwards. I didn't realize it worked that way.

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Not to be negative nancy, but I don't know any men who can handle bills on their own.. :huh2:

(Not being ABLE to pay them, but actually PAYING them)

haven't seen a bill since i was married. i'm "TOLD" what i've spent on certain things - but never once in 10yrs have i had to deal with a bill other than lunch w/the girlfriends.

hollie - i "use" to be a BIG "PHF" (use the imagination - LOL), but i am a child of the 60's and my mom is still a big hippie.

balance - key to all things;-:cursing:

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it sounds like you are making a good choice :0).

I am surprised that smoking makes your stomach feel neutral. Most people seem to be ravenously hungry afterwards. I didn't realize it worked that way.

smoking weed doesn't make you hungry period. For any people. It makes you have cravings like being on your period. I have learned to control that. Just like all drugs, you only eat if you think about eating. I knew i couldn't or i wouldn't get the surgery. And the neutral stomach works both ways. If i ate until my pants were about to burst and got high, i wouldn't feel full anymore.

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Smoking marijuana does increase appetite. In certain places cancer patients are "encouraged" to use it to encourage appetite. It definitely won't help you in your goal to lose weight.

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Thanks but I think 92 pounds speaks for itself

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92 pounds due to a device in your abdomen. Weed isn't going to overcome that. But that doesn't change the fact that you're wrong.

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The point is, there are ways to eat around your band. I did not do that regardless of the fact that I smoked pot or not. For ME, it neutralizes my stomach. I do not get hungry. If I don't go in the kitchen, I will never eat. That's all I was saying. I never said for other people it was that way.

And I have made the committment to quit so why are you trying to argue with me?

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Man, where do these people get pot?! When I was younger it was so easy but now that I'm older I'm not on the "scene" anymore so it's harder! I haven't smoked in a LONG time but I wouldn't mind a joint every now and then. It's more of an exercise for me cause I laugh my ass off!! LOL! I never really got addicted to anything but food I guess it's the lesser of all evils?

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I barely breathe when I've gotten high because of how quickly I am trying to shove food into my mouth.

Bwhahaha.. I don't care what you want to call it, I can't eat enough when it comes to pot.. which is why I basically gave it up when I got banded.

Everyone is different though, I do know some people who don't get the munchies and think I was just being a cow.

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Sounds like you are doing well. I hope you find the clarity you seek.

I don't get the "munchies" either. I am a daily smoker.

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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