At our last support group meeting, which I am co-leader of, several members had a common problem. So many of their relatives are making negative comments about their surgery...saying they "took the easy way out", "you'll just gain it back again", etc etc. I am sure we've all heard them.

What do I tell them? How do YOU deal with negative comments from yoru relatives and friends before and after surgery???

This negative energy can destroy our efforts if we let it....but how do we stop it??? I know it's all in the attitude...our attitude...but relatives and friends can be a powerful influence on us...both positively and negatively....

Need your ideas.....I am trying to help them/us through this.

Thanks!

Nancy*

I tell them they can kiss my big fat wide ass!! I wish this was easy, oh how I wish it was.

Uhm, at 156 pounds you don't have a "big fat wide ass" anymore. Sorry to break the news to you....

"Talk to the hand baby. Talk to the hand." While sometimes you cannot actually say that to their face, you can politly listen, them completely disreguard what they said.

I suppose because I was raised by wolves I have grown a thick hide as I've gotten older. Mind you, I didn't tell my mother because I just didn't want to hear all the crap she was going to put on me. My big mouthed sister blabbed to her, even after I asked her to not tell our mother. *sigh* The surprizing news is that my mother is totally suportive of me and the Band.

Talk about stunned.

Uhm, at 156 pounds you don't have a "big fat wide ass" anymore. Sorry to break the news to you.... .

Oh how I wish that were true, but NO, it is still pretty big, I don't mean rounded and pretty, I mean, big, wide and flat. Yep, I have an elephant butt. And I have to correct my ticker, because I had gone back up to 159 and since I have been drinking my water this week, I've lost 1 lb, so I'm weighed 158 this morning. I have got to get off my butt and start excercising, but I can't seem to get motivated. What the hell is wrong with me???

Yep, I have an elephant butt. ... What the hell is wrong with me???

let me hazzard a guess... body dysmorphia?

let me hazzard a guess... body dysmorphia?

what is body dysmorphia???

Okay, I looked it up and you know what I might suffer from that. Actually, I went to the post office today and they have this huge one way glass window that I hate to walk by cause I always catch a glimpse of myself and I never liked what I saw. Well guess what today, I saw myself and I can honestly say that I don't look fat anymore. Isn't that the weirdest thing. I have been fat for so long that the image of yourself does get distorted. Well anyways, I saw a friend of mine there and he told me how good I looked and that I have lost a lot of weight, It made me feel so awesome. Thank you, for making me take a look at myself and to change my mind about how I view myself. It is truly a different experience, thanks. I feel really good about myself right now, and I haven't felt like this in a long time. (I'm crying, go figure) Tks.

Wow...people are just so cruel.....glad to hear everyone has the same issues going on...that's why I love this place!!