How do you feel about kids banded?

[vinesqueen 2]

How does the band help any of us?

There are plenty of us here who are MO inspite our parents best intentions. Or perhaps despite their intentions.

[paula 4]

My daughter is 11 and overweight. I started her on a weight loss program a couple of weeks before I had my surgery. She meets monthly with a nutritionist, medical dr and a shrink. She lost 7 lbs the 1st month. She really didnt do any strict dieting, we stopped going to dunkin donuts everyday. The Drs at her program were concerned that she lost too much weight. They really dont want her "dieting" just making healthy choices.

Patty

Patty, you get a STANDING OVATION girl! Good job!!!!

[DeLarla 22]

I was banded the same time as a 13 year old. Her aunt was also having the surgery. Her mom & dad became my friends, they stayed with her the whole time. Her mom had previously undergone a bypass and lost all the weight, but she looked old and haggard. You could see the pain in Dad's eyes over what his daughter was going through, but they were very supportive parents and said this is what she desperately wanted.

Having been a fat kid and fat teenager, as much as it would probably kill me I would allow my kids (if I had any) to get the Band. Mine was such a painful childhood. I would have risked my life to be thin as a kid, and lived wishing I was dead. So I guess I'm all for it if it's something that might save a kid's soul.

[KarenB 0]

My daughter is 17 and desperately wants to be banded. I am all for it, having gone with her to w.w. and nutritionists & adolescent endocrinologist. She is border-line for getting diabetes. Apparently, her body over-produces insulin. The only cure for that is losing weight, but this makes it harder. It's a pretty viscious cycle. She was on metformin for a while, didn't help. She was a preemie (ha) & didn't gain weight till puberty. She is 5'1" & weighs 207 lbs. As soon as I can get the $ together, we're going to TJ. I already have after-care lined up for her. She is my child. I did not abuse her. She can eat all the healthy food in the world in my house & still pig out @ school & @ friends. When she was in a program when she was 14, she used to be good @ home & sneak non-diet snapple out of the house.

She's done a lot of reasearch on her own at this point, as well as being a tremendous support for me. I totally support her decision. I fully believe that if you are not in a situation you really have no business making a judgement.

DeLarla, it's moving that you know the pain of being an overweight teen; I know that pain too and don't want my Hanna to go thru it any more. I know she can lose weight on a diet, so does she. But as she so astutely said "but I'll just gain it back like you did". My husband supports her decision as well. He trusts my surgeon and as long as it's reversible and obviously when she gets married the band will not interfere with pregnancy, he's all for it. I didn't tell him that some dr's call it the fertility band!

By the way, in case it takes more months than we hope to get the $, for $12,000 she can get banded in a low BMI in study in NY that's run by my after-care nurse when she turns 18 in Dec. The point's pretty moot anyway!

So, please don't judge a mother who's trying to do the best for her child. Last time I checked, its my decision, and a pretty well-informed one at that.

[live2canoe 1]

Karen - Amen!

Sounds like you're a great Mom. It's wonderful that your daughter has a better more effective choice to manage her weight than we had when we were kids.

Your daughter is lucky to have you as a Mom.

[princess_n_thep 2]

I think this is one of those cases that would be acceptable as we have said. I know for me it was case by case for sure. I think you did a great thing by trying differnent programs first, self educating, nutritionist couseling, good support at home. I think these are the things that are important in a mom deciding if banding is right for their child or not. And of course there is the medical issue. Karen, I don't think you did wrong at all. It sounds like you did all you could and have banding as the last resort. Good job!

[I'llsucceed 1]

I fully believe that if you are not in a situation you really have no business making a judgement.

So, please don't judge a mother who's trying to do the best for her child. Last time I checked, its my decision, and a pretty well-informed one at that.

Who hear is judging you Karen? Of course its you decision & your familys. We all wish you luck & hope your daughter comes through w/flying colors!!!

Please keep in mind that everyones opionions are valid. You may not agree with them but wether or not they walk in your shoes they have the right to their own opinions.

I hope you can get into that special study & save on cost. It sounds like the care given there will be extra special because of the publicity they may have after the study is complete.

Good Luck

[KarenB 0]

I felt like I was being judged, but then I'm a bit (o.k., a lot) insecure. Upon reflection last nite, I realize there is a big difference between ages 13 and 17. I don't know that I would have been quite so enthusiastic if Hanna were only 13.

Have a good day everyone.

BTW, it's Yankees opening day & the weather here is LOUSY!

[HarleyNana 10]

Karen, if I had a 17 year old, I'd do it in a heartbeat. Why put her through additional years of anguish. I think you've prepared yourself and your daughter for this new journey and you've made a good example of yourself. Good for you lady!

Like I explained on my earlier thread about my neice, she's miserable and she could be on her way to a happier, healthier young lady.

[Kendra 0]

Well I can say for myself, If I had a teen that was morbidly obese, and I felt they were ok in mind and well informed about the band, I would help them do it. I have been fat since the age of 5. My mother had me on a diet from that moment, on to the moment I left the house at 18. It usually has little to do with parenting, and alot to do with genetics. If I had hope of this when I was in highschool, perhaps I wouldn't have wished I was dead as well. Maybe I would have actually went to school instead of hiding in my room away from everyone.

I do think, personally however, that banding at a young age (under 14) isn't that great of an idea due to puberty, emotions ect. Once again...I feel its important to be emotionally ready as well as physically. We have hardships as adults with the band..it would be hard to be an adolescent and explain to a bunch of friends that you cant have birthday cake with them because it gets stuck in your band. Or feeling those strange things we feel with the band when we eat something wrong. If I was in that place, and young I would probably freak out.

Id wait till the body was done doing the majority of its major changes first thats all.

My two cents

-Kendra

[Nykee 13]

When I had my band there was a 12 yr old having hers done. I didnt meet her but Dr. Ortiz told me all about her.. as she was being prepped.. I had direct view of the surgery room from my bed.

Dr. Ortiz was in my room telling me all about it.

HE was very excited and very proud and it was easy to tell how much he beleived it was the right thing to do..

His conversation with me included him saying this type of thing:

"Many people think the kids need all this couseling first, but its the adults who need the couseling, who have all the issues... ha ha ha (he has the best laugh)

"the kids are fat and dont want to be fat any more, its that simple... so what need is there for couseling?"

I agree..

If a kid is 12 to 15 and over 250 pounds then why not? As long as the kid and the parents KNOW EVERYTHING there is to know about it.

I Dont like to hear about all the things that go wrong witht the band.

BUT the band on its merit, doing what it is surpose to do.. simply cuts the intake of food and thats fine by me for a fat kid.

For kids 16 and up, I dont see how it should be any different than any other adult. But only significantly overweight ya know.

I have three kids

Age 18, A son, he is 230 pounds and 6 foot 4.. Big but not really fat.

Age 17, Girl, she is 144... 5 foot 6.. (she has lost 12 pounds and still loosing)

Age 14, SHE is 135 pounds.. and acts like she is 180 or something!

ALL of them became more weighty than I would of liked them to be.

I busted my butt all these years to make sure they never got FAT or obese.

It worked until they got in the teens and could eat what thet wanted away from the house. I mean I could of tried 100X harder, I feed them junk... I do.. BUT anyway..

It scares me.

[tellie 0]

Its such an emotional topic for me. While I do believe surgery should be the resort for everyone (young and old), I believe that a MO child (of 8,12, or 15 or 18) will continue with the trend like most of us here did. I also believe that parents CAN NOT do a things to stop the behaviour (my mom controlled everything available at home, but I found ways to eat loads of food everywhere else). I also KNOW its not about excersise, I was the fat kid in dance lessons, tae kwan do and swimming, I would get over 2 hrs of excersise every day, and still get fat (very fit and very flexible, but very fat).

For some people I am certain, the only alternative to being obese is something as radical as surgery. And if it was my child, I think I would feel happier with the band, knowing that it can be adjusted to include enough nutrition while restricting the urge to overeat. It would be so hard to allow my child to have surgery, but I can only imagine how heartbreaking it would be to see her grow up obese, deal with the limitations of the size socially, physically, emotionally, only to have to resort to surgery when she is older and can decide it herself. At the same time I often wonder if having gone through this made me a better person somehow, but there is no way to answer that. A thin version of me would have had many more choices available, much less depression too.

In conclusion ( sorry I just cant get the thoughts organised) I think the band is a very valid option for kids in very specific cases.

[burnsun 27]

I have been in the "obese" catagory my entire teenage and= adult life (except for a skinny week t=here and there). I also taught high school for almost 11 years- Kids are mean!!!! They were mean to me and I have seen many kiddos on the brink of suicide because of this (the tteasing the people who threw things at them from moving cars, put stuff in their lockers , etc)

I am really concerned with ever telling Adrian I had surgery for that very reason. I don't want her to think I took the easy way out and so can she. I want her to make healthy choices and do so appropriately- but gosh darn it wendy's fries DO taste better than the fruit!!!! Sorry but they do. She is my little one and I already see her ability to have my thighs (Oh how I was hoping for dad's legs)

I hope to educate her a lot more on BMI (if she asks) I know half of my problems could have been corrected if I had thouroughly understood I was " not that fat" - because of warped understanding of what was/is normal

Would I want my child (or any other) to undergo that teasing (and it is really bad!) or unecessay years of pain while waiting for surgery and age 21/

No probably not. I also have three children with whom weight will definetly be an issue and this is never going to be an option for them! I just keep running them around (or they run me - I am not sure)

But we can't even get insurance to cover most adults, who decides who gets it and who doesn't and I sure don't want to tell a MO child that they have been declined when there hopes are high there is an end in site!!! Been there done that and gained it all back with some friends.