December Surgery Buddies!

[Courtnay 40]

Hey 👋 new here.

I have my gastric bypass surgery booked for December,13th,2023. I currently reside in Ontario. I am 34 years old and a mom of two. Current weight was 381lbs. Not sure what now as I have been avoiding my scale. Heaviest I've ever been, but I've always been a bigger girl who struggles with her weight. I am very anxious about surgery, and I stupidly have been reading horror stories about this surgery. I have health anxiety which does not help lol. I actually went as far as typing goodbye letters to my children and husband just incase... I cried like a baby while thinking of what all to say incase the worst did happen. How does one put all that on paper?! But that is my brain worrying about what if? Does anyone else share this surgery date with me? Do you have reservations due to possible complications or death? I feel I need someone who is going through what I am to talk to. Thanks so much.

[MLC3409 40]

Well if it helps at all. I did the same for my kids and grandkids. You are not alone and the thoughts are real. I sadly know all too well the horror stories. I have had multiple friends go through it and I have seen the good and bad. It is hard because your fear gets in your head and you start questioning everything. I have only come to on realization. I AM going to die it is just a matter of when. If it is during surgery then I have made sure all I can do is done. To be honest if it isn’t during surgery it could happen on the drive home. We just never truly know. Now I am much older than you and my kids are grown but my grandkids are still young (6,11) so I try to do as much as I can with them incase I fall asleep and never wake up ( I also have sleep apnea).

you honestly can’t live in the what might happen. You live each day like it’s your last and don’t let tomorrow steal your today.

write the letters, tell them how much you love them and then put them up. Make your peace and then clear it from your mind.

sorry hope some of that was helpful?🤷‍♀️

[Courtnay 40]

Thank you so much for responding! Honestly it is such a big relief to have someone to talk to about this. Sure I have my husband but he doesn't really know what to say in regards to all this and I don't blame him. After all this is new to us. I have sleep apnea as well and I'm using a machine. Had my suspicions for a long time as I snore loudly lol, and both my parents have it, but it wasn't until my bariatric team sent me in to be tested that it was confirmed. Your right I could die at any moment. My kiddos are 11 and 8. I just want to be healthy so badly. The fear of being off worse after the surgery makes me nervous. I am trying to overcome this fear though and be at peace with my decision. Surgery is so close and if I cancel then I'll always wonder about what could of been.

[MLC3409 40]

Yeah, I have a machine for mine but I’m still getting use to it. The mask is irritating and I can’t use the nasal one.
I completely understand wanting to be healthy. I originally was going to have surgery 36 years ago. I was two weeks from my surgery date and found out I was pregnant and then ended up with chickenpox. So here I am trying again. 😂

yeah I don’t really have many people to talk to about this either. My daughter is good , my ex I have not told because he is all about the negative (we see each other almost everyday it’s complicated) two of my friends that had the surgery have passed, one I don’t talk to anymore, he had a really bad experience, the other lives in another state and she is in a gaining condition right now so I don’t think it’s good to talk to her. I have a couple others but we aren’t friends anymore.
It is nice to have a group to talk to.

I can only wish you all positive vibes.

[Courtnay 40]

Same!! I have to wear the full mask as I can't have the nasal one also. I will admit I am still getting use to it also. Some nights I just yank it off during my sleep lol.

Oh no I am so sorry to hear about your ex not being one you feel you can talk to, that would be awful for sure. As for those that lost their lives, do you feel comfortable sharing what complications they had from their surgery? If not no worries at all.

I got sick actually on December 3rd and thought oh great on the final countdown, I have let them know I am feeling much better, but I do wonder if they may reschedule. I am waiting to hear from them tomorrow when they are back in.

Agreed I am so thankful to have found this website! Thanks for the positive vibes. I hope all the best for you as well. Much love to you.

[MLC3409 40]

Funny you mention that. I have seen a few people have gotten sick just before surgery.

well, as far as the ones that passed neither of them was due to surgery complications. One was a drug overdose. She had so many issues after surgery and had to have a couple of emergency surgery to repair sutures. That however was on her! She did not follow the plan and less than three weeks post op she was eating Doritos. Well one c got lodged in her suture line and they had to repair it. She also over ate regular food and got some kind of blockage.
the second one that passed she actually committed suicide. Now that MIGHT have been surgery related because your body goes through so many hormonal changes as well. So that is something that if you start feeling regret know that it is Normal but find a therapist to talk it out with.
my other friend he had issues during surgery and they ended up putting him in a medical coma for two weeks. He was a large guy like me, well he was bigger by like 60 pound at around 450. I don’t know what all happened but I know he was having bleeding issues. But he was ok in a couple weeks and he was doing well the last time I talked to him.
my other friend I think she just gave up and has gone back to “normal “ for her. So she is gaining weight.
I do know I have to work on my mental health and stay disciplined after. And it shows how stuff we can control and some stuff we can’t. We just have to go into this knowing it is only a tool not a cure.
so since you have kids I would really say make sure you have a therapist. It will be rough for a few weeks after surgery I’m sure. everything else is out of our hands.
I know it is cliche but I follow the AA motto.

Accept the things we can not change, Change the things we can, And may God grant us the wisdom to know the difference.

all I’m in charge of is what food I put in my body and how much I exercise. Everything else is out of my hands.

[NJ-LV 10]

December 26th here! Just started my liquid-ish diet. Got all the paperwork signed last Thursday. New year new us!

[Courtnay 40]

Woo-hoo NJ-LV!! Congrats!

I will let you know how mine went. Here's to a new year to us indeed. Much love.

[sfugate89 10]

Hi friends!
My surgery was supposed to be today but when they ran labs my co2 came back abnormal. They ran it once more and the same thing. So they did it in an artery and it turns out I’m in acidosis. Needless to say, the surgery has been canceled for today and they’re keeping me to give me medication and attempt to find the source. I’m so upset. I feel so overwhelmed and discouraged. I would never want surgery if my body is telling me something is wrong, so I’m glad that my surgeon is in tune with that, but I was mentally and physically prepared for this. I have been counting down the days! Please help encourage me friends. I don’t want all I’ve done so far to be for nothing!

[Courtnay 40]

Oh no!! I'm so sorry to hear that sfugate89. I can imagine that being so disappointing and also worrisome to have found out. I'm so glad though that they found it prior to you going in though. That at least is a good thing. Hopefully once they found the source and treated it, then they'll do the surgery while you're still there. That is my hope anyways. My heart goes out to you. 🖤

[NickelChip 795]

On 12/12/2023 at 2:54 PM, sfugate89 said:

Hi friends!
My surgery was supposed to be today but when they ran labs my co2 came back abnormal. They ran it once more and the same thing. So they did it in an artery and it turns out I’m in acidosis. Needless to say, the surgery has been canceled for today and they’re keeping me to give me medication and attempt to find the source. I’m so upset. I feel so overwhelmed and discouraged. I would never want surgery if my body is telling me something is wrong, so I’m glad that my surgeon is in tune with that, but I was mentally and physically prepared for this. I have been counting down the days! Please help encourage me friends. I don’t want all I’ve done so far to be for nothing!

Oh no! I hope they get to the bottom of this and you're on your way back to surgery soon. I know how frustrating it is to get your hopes up and have it not happen. My surgery was supposed to be the 27th but it was abruptly cancelled last week because the surgery program at the hospital is closing down. I just got a new patient appointment at an affiliated program at a different hospital but not until Jan 2, so I know it will be at least mid-Jan or later for me now (probably later, realistically). Don't lose hope! It's hard not to be frustrated and angry, but try to stay positive!

[justinmatson 1]

Had my surgery Dec 1st! All went as planned and I think I’ve been pretty lucky. I have my 2 week checkup tomorrow with my doctor. So far I’ve only thrown up once and haven’t had any dumping or gas pains or anything. The only thing is a couple days this week I felt a little dizzy and weak, I think maybe dehydration or not getting enough calories. But I’m working on it and trying to hit my fluid goals a little higher each day. I’m very sick of Protein Shakes lol. I have to do 3 weeks of full liquids so definitely looking forward to soft foods Dec 22. I just tried cream of chicken Soup (98% fat free, strained) tonight and it was such a treat to break things up.

[MLC3409 40]

This is Awesome!!!! I am hoping that things go this well for me too 🤞🏻. I am so happy to hear that you’re doing so well!

I bought a cookbook that has full Liquid Protein recipes (it is a Bariatric cookbook) it walks through the first three week up a regular (general) diet. It has been helpful in getting ready for my post op.

[Felicia1288 9]

Here's to day 1 🎉 time flew to get here. Let time fly now through this lol. I am watching you all kill this!!

[MLC3409 40]

Hugs!!!! 🤗 Hope you’re going to have it easygoing positive vibes heading to you