Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Relationships after bypass



Recommended Posts

So is it just me or does this really change ur relationship! Ive been married for over 10 years and ever since I got the surgery and I’ve lost so much weight it’s like wow my husband is all over me , wants sex all the time , I can really tell he likes the new me or more like my new body. The thing is he’s changing , very controlling and basically doesn’t let me go out not even to family events like I’m feeling like a prisoner ! It’s just getting worst

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

some relationships change, yes. Some for the better; some for the worse. Mine is better mostly because I can now actually do things with my husband, like ride bikes, hike, etc. He loves doing stuff like that and I wasn't able to do much of it with him when I weighed almost 400 lbs. I don't blame you for feeling like a prisoner - the controlling thing would be intolerable for me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

So sorry if I sound harsh here but this is setting my alarm bells ringing. You need to have a talk with your hubby fast. Controlling behaviour is very scary and does not come from a good place. He is very frightened he will loose you, its his problem and yours to deal with.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

On 12/18/2022 at 06:28, summerseeker said:



So sorry if I sound harsh here but this is setting my alarm bells ringing. You need to have a talk with your hubby fast. Controlling behaviour is very scary and does not come from a good place. He is very frightened he will loose you, its his problem and yours to deal with.


My alarm bells are ringing too. Seek a 3rd party, like friend couple, therapy, any trusted person who seems like full of common sense to aid you with voicing your feelings/thoughts. This doesn’t sound safe and will only get worse with time if not addressed. Maybe your partner only needs some emotional bolstering but you need safety too!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

my husband went through a short phase of questioning if I will move on to "something better". And then realized that was stupid. He has never had a weight issue, so I never understood his worry.

Talk to him, he is used to you being one way and now you are changing everything.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

On 12/17/2022 at 5:48 PM, Mizzidaj said:

So is it just me or does this really change ur relationship! Ive been married for over 10 years and ever since I got the surgery and I’ve lost so much weight it’s like wow my husband is all over me , wants sex all the time , I can really tell he likes the new me or more like my new body. The thing is he’s changing , very controlling and basically doesn’t let me go out not even to family events like I’m feeling like a prisoner ! It’s just getting worst

He's showing his insecurity. I'd suggest he try counseling with possible couples counseling. I hate to say it, but if he's feeling insecure now...how will he be once you've lost all your desired weight? Maybe suggest counseling for you both...to "help you with your body image"... the counselor will see his insecurity for what it is without putting it on him 😉

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Kee-Kee

      Hello my name is Kee-Kee I'm new to the group, I'm almost a month post-opt. My biggest struggle now is eating to same thing over and over again. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Kanika katyal

      A Deep Dive into Modern Coffee Brewing: Siphon, Pour-Over and Automatic Brewers
       The rise of the automatic coffee brewer has added another dimension to this brewing renaissance. As more enthusiasts seek the perfect coffee brewer online in India, understanding these methods becomes paramount.
      Read more: https://kitchenappliancesestore.weebly.com/blog/a-deep-dive-into-modern-coffee-brewing-siphon-pour-over-and-automatic-brewers

      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • NickelChip

      I'm checked into the hotel near the hospital and just had my last protein shake of the day. My mom has kindly gone down to the restaurant alone so as not to make me die from watching her eat dinner. Checking in at the hospital tomorrow at 10:50am. So ready!
      · 1 reply
      1. BeanitoDiego

        Pulling for ya!

    • Clueless_girl

      6 wks post surgery, had to go back to the hospital to replenish potassium levels. STILL struggling with abdominal pain and nausea. Any suggestions would be appreciated!!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Six months pots-op as of yesterday. I celebrated with a HIIT class where I was challenged to do a wall-assisted handstand. I truly thought there's no way in hell that I can get up there. Well... I proved myself wrong. The instructor said, "Just try getting one foot up there." I tried and it was so easy, that the other foot went up, and the next thing that I knew, I was standing on my hands with my legs up in the air, leaning against the wall.
      Last weekend I challenged myself to a 10-mile hike, and I was SURE that my legs would be non-functional that night and the next day. But that didn't happen at all.  But I did learn that I need a new hiking boot or shoe. I've got a goal of walking the Portuguese coastal route of the El Camino later this year, and I good shoes will be essential.
      I've hit another weight loss stall, but that's to be expected. I am so close to my goal already that if it does take 6 more months to get that last stone off, that's okay with me. And I am building muscle, so that stone may never move. S'alright friends, s'alright.
      · 1 reply
      1. Bypass2Freedom

        Congratulations! I bet that felt awesome to achieve! 😄

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×