Has your relationship changed?

[sweetsmith78 60]

Has your relationship changed yes or no? For the better or worse since surgery?
Sex?

Edited October 25, 2022 by sweetsmith78

[The Greater Fool 2,071]

Relationship changed: [Because of WLS?] No;

For Better or worse: [Because of WLS bow chica bow bow?] Yes;

Good luck,

Tek

Edited October 25, 2022 by The Greater Fool

[Tomo 1,196]

No change in either. But, I do have a keeper. He loves me huge, medium or tiny. Doesn't say much either way. He knows I'm not the type that needs to hear positive reinforcement, and I know he's not the type to say negative debilitating things. It's a quiet and peaceful life, business as usual. I am lucky. I know it.

[Jeanniebug 476]

I'm only a week out from my surgery. I soooooo hope it doesn't change my relationship! I have a great guy, who loves me no matter what. And I love him with all my heart. A big reason why I got this surgery is because of the big plans that I have for US. If this changes our relationship for the worse, I would be so sad.

[KimA-GA 540]

11 hours ago, sweetsmith78 said:

Has your relationship changed yes or no? For the better or worse since surgery?
Sex?

i am pre op and if you had asked me two months ago, i would have told you that there was only a little chance my relationship would survive post op… but my husband finally is making some changes to himself to “come along” on my journey (mostly in how we interact to honor the changes I have made) .. and now i have hope I won’t be single sometime next year!

i guess relationships and weight loss have one big thing in common; it takes a lot of hard work that can often emotionally hurt to get through to the good

[SpartanMaker 1,282]

I guess the way I've heard it is that strong relationships will get stronger and weak ones may not survive.

[SuziDavis 549]

My husband, who has never really had a weight issue, keeps worrying that I could look for someone better... Yet, he paid cash for my surgery. 🤔

It gets frustrated to be accused of something that has never even crossed my mind, as I have always thought he could do much better in the looks department, especially after I gained weight the last 5 or so years.

[catwoman7 11,277]

mine got better. My husband is pretty active, and when I weighed over 300 lbs, I could barely keep up with him - and now I can. We enjoy doing a lot of activities together - like biking, walking, and kayaking - that I couldn't do before.

I agree with the person who said that strong relationships tend to get stronger and weaker ones sometimes fall apart. That does seem to be a common pattern (although of course, not always). I think with the weak ones, they sometimes fail because the person who's had surgery develops more self-confidence and has more options - they're no longer "stuck" in an iffy relationship because they're afraid its their only option.

[SuziDavis 549]

6 hours ago, SuziDavis said:

Edited October 26, 2022 by SuziDavis

[ShoppGirl 5,072]

Mine hasn’t changed, really. I am not sure if this is because we just had a pretty good foundation where we have learned through counseling and many years together to talk through things or if it is because I was thin when my husband met me and I have lost a big chunk of the weight several times over the years so it’s not really that much of a shock.

[ms.sss 15,810]

weight loss didn't change my relationship per se, but it did change me, which did affect my relationship (among other things) for the better:

i'm more confident, less tired, less annoyed, more patient.

sex? also for the better (see reasons above, ha!) but i'll also add: im more limber/bendy lol.

[STLoser 1,099]

I have a wonderful husband who has always been supportive. He loves me for who I am. I love him for who he is.
I had wls first (over 2 years ago) , and he was my biggest cheerleader. He just had his 6 months ago and now I am his cheerleader.
We did struggle in the bedroom because we were both so big before. Things just don't work the same, not to mention how we had no physical stamina.
So in that respect, our relationship has changed 100 percent for the better!
Otherwise, our relationship is no different than it ever was because it has always been a good one!


Sent from my Pixel 5a using BariatricPal mobile app

[Olivia Grant 3]

Hello. My partner is very patient with me, so our relationship has not changed. We women bring warmth, care and emotional support to relationships. We can be a source of inspiration and strength to our loved ones. Our diversity and ability to adapt to different situations is what makes us amazing. To learn more about the various aspects of women's lives, I recommend visiting https://worldofladies.com/ . This resource provides useful articles and advice for women on a variety of topics, helping them develop and be successful in all areas of life.

[ChunkCat 737]

This has been on my mind, not because I doubt my relationship, but because I see so many people on these forums and groups who are struggling with this. When I ended up with an autoimmune condition a few years into my marriage it definitely stressed things. Becoming disabled is hard on any relationship. But therapy helped a lot. When I got cancer my relationship became solid like a block of Iron. I realized then that it wasn't about if someone could endure things with you, it really is whether someone can walk through the darkness with you, embrace who you are at any given moment and roll with the changes life brings.

We all change in life, sometimes in small ways, sometimes in big ways. I found that having someone who could care for me when I was sick and yet make spaces for how I changed physically and emotionally AND still see me as WHOLE was a very big deal. We humans resist change in general, our reptilian brains don't like it. Being resilient enough to integrate change and make space for it is a huge gift in a relationship. This surgery will change me, it can't not, but I trust that my partner will roll with those changes because above all else they want me healthy and happy and this is the path I believe will give me that. It's nice to see some others have that gift in their relationships too.