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Any last minute psychology appt advice?



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I’m having my 3rd session with the surgery psych soon and I just want to be done. Not a fan of this guy and he seems to be fulfilling a role that the dietitian is supposed to fill. He’s drawing this out as long as possible. Hoping to see my own psychologist about issues I’m having but I’ve been controlling my food intake, counting calories and have been losing weight on my own. He’s just unhappy that I told him I don’t know what I’d do if I was on vacation and needed to eat or that I wasn’t substituting my Breakfast for Protein Shakes. I just really need to get past him as they won’t even let me meet my assigned surgeon to see if I like her or not and then face the next hump - either switching surgeons or going forward.

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The only thing I can suggest is to be honest and don’t try to rush the process. I don’t think the therapist asked me the right questions and I didn’t know enough to volunteer info and I passed the psyc evaluation and only learned after surgery about boredom and emotional eating. These things have been a big struggle for me and I wish I had addressed them prior to surgery. It looks like I will still be able to reach goal but it hasn’t been easy at all. Not saying that you have any of these issues. But some of us do and racing the clock in therapy trying to do both parts at once has not been fun. As much as I couldn’t wait to have the surgery I can only hope I can finish the emotional work before the honeymoon phase wears off so I don’t gain it all back.

Edited by ShoppGirl

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Unless you have an eating disorder or a drinking problem, he will pass you. Instead of feeling like you are on the hot seat, use him--ask him questions and ask for guidance for things like the vacation challenge.

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4 hours ago, lussa said:

I’m having my 3rd session with the surgery psych soon and I just want to be done. Not a fan of this guy and he seems to be fulfilling a role that the dietitian is supposed to fill. He’s drawing this out as long as possible. Hoping to see my own psychologist about issues I’m having but I’ve been controlling my food intake, counting calories and have been losing weight on my own. He’s just unhappy that I told him I don’t know what I’d do if I was on vacation and needed to eat or that I wasn’t substituting my Breakfast for Protein Shakes. I just really need to get past him as they won’t even let me meet my assigned surgeon to see if I like her or not and then face the next hump - either switching surgeons or going forward.

You could try going back to the therapist and saying “Since our last session I have thought a lot about what you said and…” tell them what you would do in the event of any inconvenience to “the Plan”. I think they are looking for signs of adaptability and growth.

However, If you have an eating disorder, it’s possible they are probing to see if you need more care before moving the process along.

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I don’t have an eating disorder.

He also seems a bit misinformed and I feel like I need to lie to meet his standards. He thinks I need to be spending 5 hours in the gym per week. Guidelines recommend 175 minutes per week (which is just shy of 3 hours…) and honestly I can’t become an exercise addict until my joint pain wears off - which will probably be after I lose a bunch of weight!

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Don't lie. Don't say things you think he would want you to say. You can finesse this next meeting by asking him questions and challenging his misconceptions--bring the guidelines with you.

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Real meaningful weight loss is a head game. It tests our resilience and adaptability. Most of us don’t know we have so many emotional areas to work upon in order to reach our goals. I’m with ShoppGirl, and I too didn’t realize how much I was emotionally eating. There’s nothing to finesse. Just be you and ask good questions because you are curious about finding real long term health.

Also, three hours a week is only 1/2 hour a day. That’s a stroll around a parking lot or a park, marching in your house, dancing, or a bike ride. It could even be broken into 3 ten minute strolls per day. Just getting up from the couch to move during TV commercials would qualify.

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On 12/13/2021 at 3:11 PM, Sunnyway said:

Unless you have an eating disorder or a drinking problem, he will pass you. Instead of feeling like you are on the hot seat, use him--ask him questions and ask for guidance for things like the vacation challenge.

Out of curiosity, I have 5 1/2 years in recovery in NA. I have my first appointment in Jan. Is there a possibility that I won't "pass" the psych eval due to history with addiction? I am also currently in OA! Just started working the program in OA and have 17 days abstinent. TIA!

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5 minutes ago, happyhodges said:

Out of curiosity, I have 5 1/2 years in recovery in NA. I have my first appointment in Jan. Is there a possibility that I won't "pass" the psych eval due to history with addiction? I am also currently in OA! Just started working the program in OA and have 17 days abstinent. TIA!

If you’ve been sober (at least for the past year) then I don’t think you should have a problem at all. As for OA then I think the psych would expect you to overeat as many obese patients do. They’ll want to work on that though so maybe expect a few sessions with them depending on how thorough they are (some don’t care). The only things that disqualify someone is active substance abuse, suicidiality and an uncontrolled condition involving bad symptoms but even that’s temporary until you’re stable.

Update I finally passed my psych eval!

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3 minutes ago, lussa said:

If you’ve been sober (at least for the past year) then I don’t think you should have a problem at all. As for OA then I think the psych would expect you to overeat as many obese patients do. They’ll want to work on that though so maybe expect a few sessions with them depending on how thorough they are (some don’t care). The only things that disqualify someone is active substance abuse, suicidiality and an uncontrolled condition involving bad symptoms but even that’s temporary until you’re stable.

Update I finally passed my psych eval!

Thank you and CONGRATULATIONS!!!!

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I hate waiting for him to finish his report. I know it’s the holidays but it’s been like 2 weeks. I’m so anxious to meet the surgeon finally and get this moving since my weight loss is beginning to stall and I don’t want to get back to my starting weight or risk having my surgery postponed if COVID gets uglier.

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So i called for my psyc evaluation appointment today here in Florida and was told next available appointment is at the end of March... 3 dang months. No way to skip it. I tried going with a online psyc bariatrics evaluation doctor and my hospital rejected it and said no because they dont do it their way. I didnt think i would have to do this since i am paying cash and not using insurance. Endo Hospital in Mexico doesnt require a Psyc Evalucation.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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