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My brother just had the gastric sleeve and called me from the hospital. He is in a lot of pain and said he regrets he did this because he can't keep even Water down. I feel really bad about this and just want to know if this common to feel this way and what I can do to support him through this. Thank you

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He just had major surgery. Even if it was his appendix, etc, it's normal to feel like that after major surgery. Tell him to ask for more pain meds, and just sleep it off!!! Things will be looking better very soon!!

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My surgery involves a sleeved stomach and yes, it's very common to second guess yourself. I struggled with my Fluid intake and they kept me in the hospital for three days because I was struggling with getting down even 8oz of Water a DAY! Eventually it got easier and I'm almost 5 months post op and get between 48oz (on a bad day) up to 80+oz. I usually average around 60oz though.

He should start feeling better around week 2 or 3 and once he starts seeing the results I believe he'll be happy about his choice then. Sorry he's having a hard time and I hope he has a speedy recovery!

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39 minutes ago, Dee5656 said:

My brother just had the gastric sleeve and called me from the hospital. He is in a lot of pain and said he regrets he did this because he can't keep even Water down. I feel really bad about this and just want to know if this common to feel this way and what I can do to support him through this. Thank you

Really common.

Support is tricky and personal so its really helpful that you know him and what works ...tough love vs soft touch etc. So try to provide him with what he truly needs. Its also pretty amazing that you are trying to support him ❤

(Personally what usually feels the most unsupportive to me is when people say "this is what YOU wanted" or "you've made your bed, now lay in it" when a person is not properly distanced from the pain, effects or influence of the perceived mistake to make it a teachable moment)

The way I usually like to be supported is by people acknowledging my feelings but not always trying to solve the problem. Sometimes just venting in a safe space is amazing.

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49 minutes ago, GreenTealael said:

Really common.

Support is tricky and personal so its really helpful that you know him and what works ...tough love vs soft touch etc. So try to provide him with what he truly needs. Its also pretty amazing that you are trying to support him ❤

(Personally what usually feels the most unsupportive to me is when people say "this is what YOU wanted" or "you've made your bed, now lay in it" when a person is not properly distanced from the pain, effects or influence of the perceived mistake to make it a teachable moment)

The way I usually like to be supported is by people acknowledging my feelings but not always trying to solve the problem. Sometimes just venting in a safe space is amazing.

Yes, thank you. I think that he just needs me to listen right now with out trying to help or fix. I'm guilty of that because he is my younger brother and I'm always trying to help.

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6 hours ago, Dee5656 said:

My brother just had the gastric sleeve and called me from the hospital. He is in a lot of pain and said he regrets he did this because he can't keep even Water down. I feel really bad about this and just want to know if this common to feel this way and what I can do to support him through this. Thank you

I felt the same way right after surgery. It is painful to drink. That goes away with time. My regrets only lasted it a few days. He will start to feel better soon and will be fine. Don't worry!

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It will get better

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The first three days or so are the roughest. Many people struggle with fluids--it's likely his stomach is swollen. He will get better each day. Tell him to be patient with himself and don't force the issue with the fluids. The regret phase is very short lived and disappears quickly once he sees the scale start moving. Good luck to him!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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