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9 pounds lost in total and gaining it back

I'm discouraged. I have been ok with this small loss (this includes preop wt. loss) knowing that 'in the future' it will come off. I had my 1st fill yesterday and I don't feel it. I have to wait 2 weeks for another fill and I'm becoming depressed about this. I haven't had restriction even after surgery. I feel like it's one of those many attempts that I've tried that will fail. I tried optifast last year at this time and did not lose anything. That was expensive. I paid cash for this operation. I really have been ok with all this but tonite I am beginning to feel dismay. I have no motivation to do any diet or exercise; what for? it will just fail like all the other times. I know this is whining and I wouldn't do it if I didn't need your help. I'm afraid to get back on the scale...:)

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