I realize that most people will probably gloss over this topic...because for most 1 surgery works and is enough and if you fall into this category, please know how fortunate you are. This is not my story

I am 5'8. In 2007 I was 273lb's and miserable! I got a Band. Following 13 fills and unfills the best I lost was 60lb's, I never achieved restriction, and unfilled to have 2 kids. All weight returned. In an unrelated accident my port flipped, and in 2015 at 265lb's I was revised to a Gastric Sleeve (Also had my gallbladder taken out, a Haital hernia repaired and the band removed). I lost 60lb's in the first 4 months and then...stopped loosing. At 205lb's I would have been happy with my results, but then, I felt no restriction and started to regain! Fast forward almost 3 years to today...I have developed GERD pretty bad and I've regained most of what I lost back!

My stomach feels hungry every hour or two, I could always eat WAY more than my sleeved friends, and once I got myself full, it would not take long for the deep primal hunger to return. I have no relief from hunger. Especially at night, I'm ravenous! I became a grazer! I felt that the Ghrelin was back with an Army to fight me! A 80% international traveling job plus unlimited access to food in the best restaurants around the globe did not help. I have felt dejected, humiliated, like a failure, angry, frustrated and the list goes on for miles, if you are still reading, you probably know how I feel. And indeed, It's not just about how I look...it's about how I feel. Horrible!! My weight is pressing, intrusive and pervasive. There is no time that I am not aware of it. I have sleep Apnea, I can't keep up with my 6 and 7 year old's and the simple things in life are hard again. Completely demoralizing... After almost 3 years, I finally said "Enough" and went back to a new Surgeon. An Endoscopy revealed it has not all been my fault. My Sleeve was cut too big to begin with! My new surgeon reveled he knows the work of the previous surgeon who apparently was not very skilled at the time and making sleeves too big to be successful. A Bougie 42 was was too big to begin with but in my case, even that was very loosely cut. To top it off, my Sleeve was mis-shapen to begin with as well, setting me up for failure and I have a Stricture in the middle, causing me to have an Hourglass shape. Top fills up, stretches, bottom is hungry, then food goes to the bottom and is still there, top is hungry, in short...a hot mess!

Miraculously given the Haital Hernia, GERD, Stricture and botched initial surgery, my insurance (that does not cover Bariatrics) has approved a revision to Bypass on Aug 22nd. I've been combing the internet for Sleeve to RNY revision but such information is not as readily available as 1st timers. I am so nervous...so frightened to go through with this. Scared of Anesthesia, scared how I would do, scared of the 3 week post op liquid only phase. Scared that I will fail again, that this will not work. Some Surgeons (like the Pound of Cure guy say you can only expect to loose 10 - 25lbs on a Sleeve to RNY revision, woa?? ) But I have to try...I want to live a full and vibrant life and not just exist like an Amoeba! This is truly Project last chance. My husband is supportive, but my friends, judgmental and not supportive. and if ever I needed some advice, encouragement, support etc...it's now...

Nervous but cautiously hopeful, and very much in need of your support...

Ellie

20 hours ago, ellie123 said:

I realize that most people will probably gloss over this topic...because for most 1 surgery works and is enough and if you fall into this category, please know how fortunate you are. This is not my story

I am 5'8. In 2007 I was 273lb's and miserable! I got a Band. Following 13 fills and unfills the best I lost was 60lb's, I never achieved restriction, and unfilled to have 2 kids. All weight returned. In an unrelated accident my port flipped, and in 2015 at 265lb's I was revised to a Gastric Sleeve (Also had my gallbladder taken out, a Haital hernia repaired and the band removed). I lost 60lb's in the first 4 months and then...stopped loosing. At 205lb's I would have been happy with my results, but then, I felt no restriction and started to regain! Fast forward almost 3 years to today...I have developed GERD pretty bad and I've regained most of what I lost back!

My stomach feels hungry every hour or two, I could always eat WAY more than my sleeved friends, and once I got myself full, it would not take long for the deep primal hunger to return. I have no relief from hunger. Especially at night, I'm ravenous! I became a grazer! I felt that the Ghrelin was back with an Army to fight me! A 80% international traveling job plus unlimited access to food in the best restaurants around the globe did not help. I have felt dejected, humiliated, like a failure, angry, frustrated and the list goes on for miles, if you are still reading, you probably know how I feel. And indeed, It's not just about how I look...it's about how I feel. Horrible!! My weight is pressing, intrusive and pervasive. There is no time that I am not aware of it. I have sleep Apnea, I can't keep up with my 6 and 7 year old's and the simple things in life are hard again. Completely demoralizing... After almost 3 years, I finally said "Enough" and went back to a new Surgeon. An Endoscopy revealed it has not all been my fault. My Sleeve was cut too big to begin with! My new surgeon reveled he knows the work of the previous surgeon who apparently was not very skilled at the time and making sleeves too big to be successful. A Bougie 42 was was too big to begin with but in my case, even that was very loosely cut. To top it off, my Sleeve was mis-shapen to begin with as well, setting me up for failure and I have a Stricture in the middle, causing me to have an Hourglass shape. Top fills up, stretches, bottom is hungry, then food goes to the bottom and is still there, top is hungry, in short...a hot mess!

Miraculously given the Haital Hernia, GERD, Stricture and botched initial surgery, my insurance (that does not cover Bariatrics) has approved a revision to Bypass on Aug 22nd. I've been combing the internet for Sleeve to RNY revision but such information is not as readily available as 1st timers. I am so nervous...so frightened to go through with this. Scared of Anesthesia, scared how I would do, scared of the 3 week post op liquid only phase. Scared that I will fail again, that this will not work. Some Surgeons (like the Pound of Cure guy say you can only expect to loose 10 - 25lbs on a Sleeve to RNY revision, woa?? ) But I have to try...I want to live a full and vibrant life and not just exist like an Amoeba! This is truly Project last chance. My husband is supportive, but my friends, judgmental and not supportive. and if ever I needed some advice, encouragement, support etc...it's now...

Nervous but cautiously hopeful, and very much in need of your support...

Ellie

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. There are many stories on the Internet of people being successful after Lapband->VSG->RNY. Do not be scared. You need to set yourself up for success with surgery by following ALL pre-op & post-op instructors. Do not have a pity party or food funerals. You can do this.

But please keep in mind that bariatric surgery does not necessarily curb psychological cravings for food. Nor does it necessarily change emotional eating patterns. Emotional eating after WLS leads to LESS weight loss and can lead to weight regain. So make sure you’re doing the work to address the mental side of obesity - don’t be afraid to seek out assistance from a bariatric-focused psychologist. Good luck!

Thank you so much @MarinaGirl! Your words are so encouraging to me! Indeed tomorrow I will be going to see a Bariatric Psychologist and pour my heat out. I will be looking for resources and support groups, because I am really not as interested about how much I will weigh 1 year out vrs 5. And you are right, I start the official 1 week pre op on Wed, but have already stopped all the obvious nonsense. Food funerals are futile...I can’t hold on to the taste, and just cuz I have it, does big mean I will not crave it again. But it does mean I’m setting myself up with more to loose. I’ve ordered some Food Addiction books “Emotional First Aid” for Bariatric patients etc. This is gonna be a battle, that is physical, but mostly mental. I am trying to get my Whole Head into it with focus and determination to succeed. Just praying I wake up from Surgery anc am given a chance to get this right!