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I recently received my surgery date and it's on April 24th. Since I received my date, I have told a few people in my closest circle of friends and family. However, I have received a little pushback from people who I thought would be supportive. For example, my mom keeps trying to find excuses for me to push back my surgery date by saying things like, "oh let's wait until after you finish building your house" or "oh it's a stressful time at work right now you should push it off." I've just been standing firm and saying that no time is ever going to be perfect. Then today, one of my close friends stated, " I am worried about you because of everything going on right now (budget cuts at our job and reorganization occurring)." I know they care about me but I am tired of having to defend my decision to have a healthier lifestyle.

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I totally understand. I had pushback from one person... thankfully I was able to just cut them out. They were worried that I’d be “hotter” than them... no care about my health. Got rid of them VERY quick.

In the end, you need to do what’s best for you ️ just keep letting them know how important it is to you and that their support is very vital especially in these early stages!

My surgery date is April 25 so I’m happy to be a surgery buddy/support person for you :)


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Stick to your decision, and tell them that it's nice that they care, but what you need right now is no detractors from YOUR decision. Then full speed ahead, start preparing your supplies, test some Protein Shakes, get excited!!! Good luck.

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@TLHvsg2018 it is so very important to get rid of the toxic people in your life before making this decision.

You are already "hotter" than them because of your heart! Now you are taking the steps to have that heartbeat for longer in your new healthy body! :)

Yay to being my surgery buddy! I am grateful for the support!

I just peeped your profile and you are gorgeous! They just hating lol!

Edited by CurlyV

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@Sosewsue61 thank you! I have Premier Protein on my desk right now! I agree it is time to get excited!

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I would also add in contrast sometimes the pushback I got was because of ignorance or fear for me that was based in the heartfelt, but completely wrong view of what the surgery is and its risks. At the end of the day while it may change our lives this is a pretty simple surgery with very little downtime and/or complications. Heck the only reason this isn't an outpatient surgery is because they have to make sure you can take in liquids before sending you home.

I found that explaining the surgery to those naysayers got them to understand. If you are dealing with those like "TLHvsg2018" mentioned then as my nana would say "F*ck Them."

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[mention=334782]TLHvsg2018[/mention] it is so very important to get rid of the toxic people in your life before making this decision.
You are already "hotter" than them because of your heart! Now you are taking the steps to have that heartbeat for longer in your new healthy body! [emoji4]
Yay to being my surgery buddy! I am grateful for the support!

I just peeped your profile and you are gorgeous! They just hating lol!


Thank you! You are gorgeous as well!! Best of luck on your surgery and the dreaded pre-op diet LOL


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1 minute ago, TLHvsg2018 said:


Thank you! You are gorgeous as well!! Best of luck on your surgery and the dreaded pre-op diet LOL

Thank you and the same to you! I have started now half days on liquid just to ease my way over. I will say that I am not looking forward to it but I will look at all these before and after pictures and imagine my life with potentially not being on metformin and I will push through!

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7 minutes ago, aNYCdb said:

I would also add in contrast sometimes the pushback I got was because of ignorance or fear for me that was based in the heartfelt, but completely wrong view of what the surgery is and its risks. At the end of the day while it may change our lives this is a pretty simple surgery with very little downtime and/or complications. Heck the only reason this isn't an outpatient surgery is because they have to make sure you can take in liquids before sending you home.

I found that explaining the surgery to those naysayers got them to understand. If you are dealing with those like "TLHvsg2018" mentioned then as my nana would say "F*ck Them."

That is good advice! I will definitely break it down to them so they are not worrying so much. You have a wise Nana! Words to live by! lol

Edited by CurlyV

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30 minutes ago, CurlyV said:

I recently received my surgery date and it's on April 24th. Since I received my date, I have told a few people in my closest circle of friends and family. However, I have received a little pushback from people who I thought would be supportive. For example, my mom keeps trying to find excuses for me to push back my surgery date by saying things like, "oh let's wait until after you finish building your house" or "oh it's a stressful time at work right now you should push it off." I've just been standing firm and saying that no time is ever going to be perfect. Then today, one of my close friends stated, " I am worried about you because of everything going on right now (budget cuts at our job and reorganization occurring)." I know they care about me but I am tired of having to defend my decision to have a healthier lifestyle.

After I had my surgery all I could think was regret that I didn't do this sooner. I could have done it years ago. I'm positive you won't regret having this surgery during anytime in your life. Good luck and congrats on your decision!

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I wholeheartedly agree with AshAsh1! I also wish I would have done it sooner as well! However, I am so happy I did it. I am at month 8 and 85# lighter. I held off until after my daughter’s HS graduation, and after a cruise.... in hind site, I would have been more comfortable and confident if I had done it sooner. I am very happy with the weight loss. People just don’t understand how life changing and positive this is for health! Stick with it, you won’t regret it.


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I hope to post some before and after pics, I just have to dig up those before ones that I hate to look at!


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Thanks @MaggieH2 and @AshAsh1 !

Look forward to seeing your before and after pics, Maggie!

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If you waited for every distraction and life event to disappear before having surgery, you will die before ever being sleeved. LOL I'm sure not all of these people are toxic in your life, they just care and are worried. It REALLY sucks that you have to reassure them when you're looking for reassurance yourself. I think you're making the right decision and you have us here to continue to vent!! But most importantly, I can't wait to hear about your progress in future posts!!!

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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