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Can't stop crying



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I was sleeved on 8/23. It has been a whole month and I have only lost 25 pounds. I'm a big girl I should have lost more. I'm not eating nearly what I was eating before but staying under 900 calories a day. What is wrong with me? Why am I not losing? I feel like this was all a mistake and I'm going to just stay fat forever. The scale hasn't moved in about 2 weeks and my heart is broken.

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One month in and "only" lost 25lbs. That is a substantial amount. I'd start with balancing your expectation with something more realistic.. It took the first two months of constant irritation and anger when I stalled to make me realise its not always going to happen fast 7 weeks!!! No movement. Then suddenly no change losing 5lbs in a week.

Take a deep breath and have a look around.

"I should have lost more " How do you know have you done this before?

It happens to us all and Its so discouraging. But normal. Keep hitting your Protein and Water goals.. Many things can contribute to the scale not moving but also your body has to catch up. You will get there.

What are your stats and what are you eating.

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Be patient and be kind to yourself. We all get so hung up on the number on the scale.

have you had any non-scale victories? Do your clothes fit better? Do you feel better physically? Hang in there- those numbers will change!

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I was sleeved on 8/23. It has been a whole month and I have only lost 25 pounds. I'm a big girl I should have lost more. I'm not eating nearly what I was eating before but staying under 900 calories a day. What is wrong with me? Why am I not losing? I feel like this was all a mistake and I'm going to just stay fat forever. The scale hasn't moved in about 2 weeks and my heart is broken.


Sweetheart! Stop. It's okay. Next week your gonna prob lose 10 lbs. I felt like that too. I stepped on the scale and I gained 4 lbs. you will retain Water especially near your lady time. As long as you aren't eating Pasta, rice, fried foods and a ton of carbs the way will come off. Do yourself a favor and stop weighing yourself! Everything will work out . I'm down around 30 at 46 days. When is the last time you lost that much weight? That's what my surgeon asked me. I was like ... yea you're right.. in due time 🖤


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25lbs during the first month is in the top 10% of weight loss amounts for sleevers (which means 90% of people lose LESS than that during the first month postop!)

Personally I lost an average amount.. 17lbs.. and I started at 305.. just a bit less than you. You're doing great!

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On 9/23/2017 at 8:29 PM, Berry78 said:

25lbs during the first month is in the top 10% of weight loss amounts for sleevers (which means 90% of people lose LESS than that during the first month postop!)

Where is information like this found? I feel like my expectations may be unrealistic, but I don't really know what to expect so I don't if I'm doing well. I was sleeved on Aug. 1 so it's 11 weeks today. I've lost 49-50 pounds...but for the last 2 weeks I've been bouncing around 278, 279, and 280. I went to the gym today and had my best workout ever. I'm eating very low carbs...I feel like I should have lost more by now. I understand that everyone is different, but how do we know if we're on track???

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2 hours ago, TammyA said:

Where is information like this found? I feel like my expectations may be unrealistic, but I don't really know what to expect so I don't if I'm doing well. I was sleeved on Aug. 1 so it's 11 weeks today. I've lost 49-50 pounds...but for the last 2 weeks I've been bouncing around 278, 279, and 280. I went to the gym today and had my best workout ever. I'm eating very low carbs...I feel like I should have lost more by now. I understand that everyone is different, but how do we know if we're on track???

I'm always finding out new stuff. But here is a really nifty calculator.

http://www.obesityhelp.com/morbidobesity/information/planner+results.php

Scroll down a bit and put in your preop weight, height, and start off with 65% excess body weight. See how closely the curve matches your current weight trajectory. If you change 65 to 60 or 70 or 100, it'll change the graph.

My personal stats:

5'7 female

Started at 305lbs

Lost 16lbs on preop diet

Month 1, lost: 17lbs

2: 13lbs

3: 8lbs

4: 12lbs

5: 14lbs

6: 7lbs

I'm almost 7 months out and have lost a total of 96lbs. My losses seem to be pretty .. median. Some lose faster or slower, a lot seem to lose at the same rate. When I type in 87%, the losses on the graph mesh up with my current weight (which means I may well be WELL above the 65% average). My final weight according to this graph will be 168lbs.

Another calculation is to simply take your starting weight (for me, 305lbs) and multiply times 0.6. 305x0.6= 183lbs. (Which is 77% according to the graph calculator).

So many different ways of calculating potential losses.. and none of them agree with each other!

The real answer to your future is what your body and mind can work together to produce. Statistics, charts, averages, calculators.. these things take hundreds or thousands of people, and lump them together to figure out how bariatric folk, as a population, fare. The individual trials and triumphs are erased.

I have 3 surgery-buds that all started lighter than me, but our weights have all tracked along, sometimes to the pound! 2 had sleeves and one had a bypass. By 6 months postop, they were all within 10lbs of goal. Since I started out 50lbs heavier than they did, I still have quite a ways to go. A couple of them exercise a lot, one exercises moderately, and I don't exercise at all. But we all have lost the same amount of weight (to this point). I do believe the surgery is what does the work for the first 6 months. After that, it's more up to us to effect the change we want.

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12 hours ago, Berry78 said:

Scroll down a bit and put in your preop weight, height, and start off with 65% excess body weight. See how closely the curve matches your current weight trajectory. If you change 65 to 60 or 70 or 100, it'll change the graph.

That calculator is awesome! Thanks for sharing it. According to the graph I'm running pretty close to 60% right now. That makes me think I need to ramp up my exercise because if I was on the 65% chart I'd have about 2 weeks to lose 14 pounds. Yikes! I know it's a just a guide and everyone loses at different rates, but I've had a few slow weeks and now I want to catch up :)

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My dr said 25 lbs first month and about 6-10 lbs each month after that is normal. Surgery isn't instant. It is still going to take hard work. I'm 4 months out and have lost 44 lbs. you are doing great.


Mich W
Hw 223, SW 217 CW 179.0 GW 135

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That is an awesome calculator. I am right on track


Mich W
Hw 223, SW 217 CW 179.0 GW 135

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    • LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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