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So, I'm pre-op, but working on my diet and exercise. Trying, anyway. I had a great experience where I had a fast food burger and it made me feel like crap - I had no desire for another one! Yay!

Anyway, my kids are little (2 and 5 years), they need Momma for just about everything. The hubs is good, but I still often feel frustrated and overwhelmed. I'm worried about the upcoming surgery, trying to set myself up for success, trying to manage stress and anxiety without my OLD coping strategies (eating a ton of carbs until I feel sleepy, or having a couple of drinks - literally, my tired old ass will usually fall sleep after 2 drinks) ... and still be a good Mom. A good mom who's not angry all the time.

Any ideas?

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What specifically are your worries? The five year old is at a great age to be a "helper" when you get home from the hospital. The issue with the 2 year old may be that you won't be able to lift him/her for a few weeks. But when my youngest was 2, I had major surgery and couldn't do a lot (I was in a cast on my right ankle for 8 weeks and the first two weeks I was completely non weightbearing.) I just reminded her over and over that mommy had a boo boo and we had to do things differently. They are pretty adaptable at that age.

And your hubby can probably do way more than you think.

Granted, my kids were way older when I had this surgery - they are 14 and 17, but my hubs still had to do more than usual for a week or two. However, I had a laparoscopic sleeve and was back to work less than a week after surgery. (I'm a desk jockey.)

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Mainly, I'm concerned with sticking to the diet and exercise plan in the midst of the circus that is my home. It's sometimes really hard to find time for myself, even to do 30-minutes uninterrupted on the treadmill. I have also used food as a coping strategy when I'm stressed out, I can eat while the kids do their human tornado routine and it seems to take the edge off. Now that I can't do that, what's left? Just thinking ahead, I know a lot of folks go through a mourning period/ depression after surgery. I often feel that I'm already at capacity, emotionally, so the prospect of one-more-thing is daunting.

Also, cooking. I do all the cooking. Is food going to gross me out, like in the early stages of pregnancy when some things just make you want to hurl?

I did have a good experience doing some crunches today with my 5yo shouting "go, mommy, go!" Haha :)

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A new reality. So for me I changed cooking and realized I have to take the time for me. Come for a walk or to the YMCA but a as family we had to do better A role model moment. The world continued. I still feel at max capacity most of the time and my dining room table is littered With streusel Their junk can not be my jam - strawberry ice cream is OK I will not let Rocky road in the house. Somehow it worked out and we are all a little bit healthier


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I was also overwhelmed myself and am easily agitated by shenanigans. I was before surgery though, so I haven't noticed much of a change there. Instead of repeatedly asking hubby to help more, I leaned out, my plan is to work part time for the next couple of years until the kiddos are older.

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Oh, it is glorious to get out of the house! I work full time, but I'm a teacher. So, same schedule as kids when it comes to vacations, which is what I wanted in theory! Haha - I, too, have little tolerance for shenanigans. I've been assured that these children will be surly teenagers before I know it. At present, 5yo is literally laying across my chest as I type.

I just feel like this whole process is really emotional and I don't have any energy to spare. I'm afraid that when my tank is empty, I'll be all the more tempted to go back to my old ways of snacking-as-stress-management.

It is comforting to see that other moms have done it successfully!

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One of Mine does not eat veggies and the other one doesn't eat fish. Enough! My stress go to is perfume and essential oils. Find a treat that is not food.

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Good call. I really do need to find another treat - and something I can enjoy in the midst of the craziness.

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