Hi all,

Recently had a slew is off issues happen in the span of a couple of months. This past year has been an emotionally difficult one when a loved one was diagnosed with an illness and it spiraled into resolve when they passed just recently. The stress of this came a week before my wedding and bam, my depression hit. I started to notice I was starving myself for hours and then munching on chocolate and popcorn.

We had to entertain guests and mourn privately in the middle of this chaos, lo and behold I weighed myself last night (first time in a month) and cried to see I was 8 lbs heavier. I am so discouraged and so disappointed in myself. I find the motivation to continue being healthy is harder than ever and I still feel sadness from all the recent stresses and how it's weighed me down. I am mourning quite hard and feel almost self-destructive because of the loss.

My husband (as we're a recently married couple) expressed his sadness to my weight gain and though he has been supportive of my stress and understands the reasoning, couldn't help but say he was disappointed in me too. I want to feel confident but I am notorious for being a depression eater (I starve and graze on crap typically) and I am terrified my stress will cause my hormones and body to just keep responding by gaining weight. I need some support feeling ever so discouraged that I won't finish my journey and lose the last 30 lbs I need to get to my end goal.

Ah hon. I'm so sorry. The only thing I can think of is for you to go back to why you had the surgery in the first place. This will take putting your feelings of depression behind. It's okay and healthy to grieve and please do, I just wouldn't want you to wallow and dwell in it for so long as you know it's not the best for you to do. Enjoy your marriage, look forward to happy times, and please take care of yourself. Going backwards with the wrong choices of food and why you're eating will only make the matters worse me you'll end up feeling even worse too. On another hand, find a grief counselor if you can, this in turn will help you deal with the depression and grief in the right ways for you. Blessings to you hon.