I'd like to start a dialogue on the psychological and emotional post-op emotions after banding. What happens when we are no longer able to mask our problems with food? Discuss.

...........

She had bypass but relevent to me was this portion of something Star Jones said.

from Glamour, September 2007. "Getting Over Myself" An interview with Star Jones. Page 312, "The Night Before the surgery"

The night before the surgery, I convinced myself that afterward everything would be fine and I could get on with the rest of my life. I had no idea that before I could move on, I would have to face the present and the past as they were, not as I wished them to be.

A few years ago, I wrote, "Living in truth means living in confrontation." I admit that when asked about my obvious weight loss over the past four years, I was intentionally evasive. Lying was never an option for me, so I called it a "medical intervention" which was true, but it was really a pathetic attempt to tell only the truth I could handle at the time.

Although I'd shared my decision with friends, family and my collegues at The View, I wasn't ready to invite the world into my process for a number of reasons: First, I didn't know if the surgery would work. I had never stuck to a diet or committed to exercise for more than a month, and I had spent my entire adult life telling everyone that I was fine with the way I looked. I also never thought I'd have to explain it. I actually thought that I could say, "None of your business," and people would say "Okay, she wants to remain private." If that isn't evidence of someone not living in truth, I don't know what is. Everything about me was already so public (mostly my own doing --talk about dumb!) so of course everyone wanted to know what I had done. I was also terrified someone would have a tragic result after emulating me without making an informed decision with her doctor. But the complete truth is, I was scared of what people might think of me. I was afraid to be vulnerable, and ashamed at not being able to get myself under control without this procedure.

( cont' in Glamour)

focus on the family has a great website that deals with emotional issues. one that has helped me is called pure intimacy. it deals with addiction and eating disorders. very informative . the whole website has great info.

I am going to look up that focus on the family website.

I think Overeaters Annon. is also good for teaching people to deal with their issues.

I have found the problem with lap band is that I can still eat if I want to, when I don't want to deal with something. My biggest

downfall has always been ice cream. This is a bandsters delight.

I could probably eat a half a gallon of ice cream and not PB, unfortunately. The good thing is that it's so much harder for me to lose than it is to gain. I can easily gain 5 lbs over a weekend and it will take me 2 weeks to lose it. I have to really decide how

badly I want that ice cream. Nearly every time I wanted to make a trip to Baskin and Robbins, I came to LBT instead.

I just ended nearly 2 years in counseling learning how to deal with issues. I'm not all the way there yet, but I'm moving, and instead of finding a new counselor, I'm going to try it on my own for a while. We went through a lot of my past to get to the issues of the present. I discovered that most of my pain was things that I had stuffed away and never dealt with, which was most of my childhood. My mom had a "get over it" kind of attitude, and since she didn't give me time to really deal with things, I had to stuff them away so as not to show her I was upset. So within the last 2 years I've felt about 15 years worth of pain that I never let myself pay attention to before. I'm better at dealing with things now. Whenever I am upset at my husband, I will tell him I am upset, and we will talk about what's bothering me. Not that he and I fought a lot before, but I used to just stuff it down like everything else until I boiled over. It's much nicer now.

I still can't really confront my mom, but I can say no to her now. My sisters and I will have confrontations now and then, but they get worked out easily too.