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Feelin' sorry for myself

Jazzzyjay

By Jazzzyjay, in Gastric Bypass Surgery Forums

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Jazzzyjay    222

Jazzzyjay
Posted

You should use the search option on here to search where you live. Someone might be able to help you

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Thank you. That's a great suggestion but I haven't been able to find anyone in Omaha.

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Jill_Me    100

Jill_Me
Posted

You can pay for an aide to stay with you for a day or two, but as someone who is a case manager for an insurance company it is very unlikely they'll pay for it. It is worth the try to call the insurance company and maybe ask for an exception or some assistance with paying for an aide. It could save them money in the long run so I guess you never know! Most insurance companies have case managers you can be connected with via the main customer service phone line. Good luck!

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Jazzzyjay    222

Jazzzyjay
Posted

You can pay for an aide to stay with you for a day or two, but as someone who is a case manager for an insurance company it is very unlikely they'll pay for it. It is worth the try to call the insurance company and maybe ask for an exception or some assistance with paying for an aide. It could save them money in the long run so I guess you never know! Most insurance companies have case managers you can be connected with via the main customer service phone line. Good luck!

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OK great, thank you!

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HurricaneU    131

HurricaneU
Posted

Just got done with all my pre op stuff. Surgery is Jan 17. My surgeon told me she won't do my surgery unless I have someone to look after me and help me for at least the first 48 hours after being discharged. I have no one. I'm not exaggerating. My soon to be ex husband kept me totally isolated. I'm feeling so sad that I don't have a soul that will help me. I'll lie to her if I have to. Please don't judge. I'm a tough cookie. But it's just so heartbreaking that I am absolutely alone in this world.

BTW...How do you even make friends at 40?

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Not sure if you found anyone but just hire a nurse or a housekeeper. Im sure it would be costly but for 2 or 3 days it may be worth if in case of an emergency.

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teedsg    253

teedsg
Posted

Just got done with all my pre op stuff. Surgery is Jan 17. My surgeon told me she won't do my surgery unless I have someone to look after me and help me for at least the first 48 hours after being discharged. I have no one. I'm not exaggerating. My soon to be ex husband kept me totally isolated. I'm feeling so sad that I don't have a soul that will help me. I'll lie to her if I have to. Please don't judge. I'm a tough cookie. But it's just so heartbreaking that I am absolutely alone in this world.

BTW...How do you even make friends at 40?

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Hey lady, we care about you and we want you to be safe. So, I would like to suggest going to a church, salvation army, asking a clergyman, a nursing student, or you may need to hire someone on Care.com. Please don't sell yourself short by doing this without help for 48 hours. I pray you find someone honest and helpful during this time and that you can develop more friends. :)

Only a small stepping stone to help you get your surgery. Maybe there's someone on BP that's in your area who wouldn't mind helping you out temporarily. :) ^_^

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Jazzzyjay    222

Jazzzyjay
Posted

Just got done with all my pre op stuff. Surgery is Jan 17. My surgeon told me she won't do my surgery unless I have someone to look after me and help me for at least the first 48 hours after being discharged. I have no one. I'm not exaggerating. My soon to be ex husband kept me totally isolated. I'm feeling so sad that I don't have a soul that will help me. I'll lie to her if I have to. Please don't judge. I'm a tough cookie. But it's just so heartbreaking that I am absolutely alone in this world.

BTW...How do you even make friends at 40?

Sent from my Y538 using the BariatricPal App

Hey lady, we care about you and we want you to be safe. So, I would like to suggest going to a church, salvation army, asking a clergyman, a nursing student, or you may need to hire someone on Care.com. Please don't sell yourself short by doing this without help for 48 hours. I pray you find someone honest and helpful during this time and that you can develop more friends. :)

Only a small stepping stone to help you get your surgery. Maybe there's someone on BP that's in your area who wouldn't mind helping you out temporarily. :)^_^

Thank you so much. I am actually going to a church in my area for service on Sunday. I'll ask if they might have someone or know of someone low cost.

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teedsg    253

teedsg
Posted

Just got done with all my pre op stuff. Surgery is Jan 17. My surgeon told me she won't do my surgery unless I have someone to look after me and help me for at least the first 48 hours after being discharged. I have no one. I'm not exaggerating. My soon to be ex husband kept me totally isolated. I'm feeling so sad that I don't have a soul that will help me. I'll lie to her if I have to. Please don't judge. I'm a tough cookie. But it's just so heartbreaking that I am absolutely alone in this world.

BTW...How do you even make friends at 40?

Sent from my Y538 using the BariatricPal App

Hey lady, we care about you and we want you to be safe. So, I would like to suggest going to a church, salvation army, asking a clergyman, a nursing student, or you may need to hire someone on Care.com. Please don't sell yourself short by doing this without help for 48 hours. I pray you find someone honest and helpful during this time and that you can develop more friends. :)

Only a small stepping stone to help you get your surgery. Maybe there's someone on BP that's in your area who wouldn't mind helping you out temporarily. :)^_^

Thank you so much. I am actually going to a church in my area for service on Sunday. I'll ask if they might have someone or know of someone low cost.

Sent from my Y538 using the BariatricPal App

Amen! Give us an update once you have someone. And, keep us posted after surgery! :) B)

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Marissa.Ann.C    21

Marissa.Ann.C
Posted

Your insurance company should have info about home health care that you can have for those 2 days. My insurance specifically asked if I'd need it or not and I just got approved. No surgery date yet

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Carol Adkisson    18

Carol Adkisson
Posted

I know how hard this can be. It's been a while, but when I was going through the process pre-surgery, I was posting on fb that I needed help to get to the hospital and back and afterward. I felt very alone during that time. My daughter was 15 and she took care of me. I don't think she appreciated doing that at her age, but I really had no choice. I had many friends with busy lives and realized during that time that family is often most faithful to step up. All I can say is that you will figure out a solution, I don't know what it is yet, I see a lot of ideas in the posts above. How do you make friends at 40, you just do. I know people that make friends at 60. In my line of work I often help people to create those resources in their life as it is so important for them to have friends. Your life will change so much through this process that at some point you will have more friends. I suggest you get involved in the support groups as soon as possible as they are a great resource. If I can help you, please let me know, I am a therapist and help people to work through these issues all the time. Hang in there.

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Jazzzyjay    222

Jazzzyjay
Posted

I know how hard this can be. It's been a while, but when I was going through the process pre-surgery, I was posting on fb that I needed help to get to the hospital and back and afterward. I felt very alone during that time. My daughter was 15 and she took care of me. I don't think she appreciated doing that at her age, but I really had no choice. I had many friends with busy lives and realized during that time that family is often most faithful to step up. All I can say is that you will figure out a solution, I don't know what it is yet, I see a lot of ideas in the posts above. How do you make friends at 40, you just do. I know people that make friends at 60. In my line of work I often help people to create those resources in their life as it is so important for them to have friends. Your life will change so much through this process that at some point you will have more friends. I suggest you get involved in the support groups as soon as possible as they are a great resource. If I can help you, please let me know, I am a therapist and help people to work through these issues all the time. Hang in there.

Thank you! I've hired someone to come look in on me for the first couple of days. I'm feeling pretty confident at this point that I'll do alright. Soon after surgery I'll attend the support groups. I'm very excited for that. I have also found a free yoga class in my area. As soon as my Dr clears me I'm joining!

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Go To Topic Listing Gastric Bypass Surgery Forums

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    • Alisa_S

      Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • KimBaxleyWilson

      KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • bellaamey

      bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.

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