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Losing yourself literally



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Okay so i have not had surgery yet and like alot of people here i am having it for health reasons. However i have to be honest with my self i am curious as to what ill look like. About three years back i was diagnosed with graves and hashimotos disease. Which caused me to lose 80 pounds now i am a big girl so that was a drop in the bucket for me however people did notice it in my face. They would make a comment along the lines of you look prettier with a fuller face. I actually heard it often. Now that i am waiting for my surgery i have to admit that even though i am doing it for health i cant help but wonder if i will lose my character. I see the before and after pics of all you losers and of course everyone looks great and i hear about all the gained confidence and what not but im wondering how many of you feel like you lost some of yourself? Like going from a kind face to a more stern look. Or being told you have a bubbly personality to not. Did your wls surgery success come with a price? Sorry just thinking????

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Like everything in life, there are trade-offs. I traded improved health for my love of food. It was a good decision. I am 3 years post-op RNY gastric bypass surgery. I am much more active and my stamina (ability to perform physical labor) has improved dramatically.

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The only comments I have gotten about either my weight or looks or personality have been 100% positive, and I certainly feel great. Honestly I think whoever was rude enough to say you looked better when fatter was being a passive aggressive jerk.

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Many big girls are very pretty with their soft, rounded faces. When that fat is gone they are not as "pretty".

For about a year after surgery, I looked too skinny. I still have a more angled to my face than when I was fat. But a lot filled back in by year 3.

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I understand what you are saying. I view hard lines as being more towards the manly side. If you are concerned you can always do plastic surgery to soften those lines.

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They can do phenomenal things with injections these days. Bethenny Frankel softened her jaw with Botox for example.

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Honestly speaking losing weight definitely makes your face look older. Everything droops a bit and it takes a while for your brain to catch up with the changes.

That being said, I have never received a negative comment about my looks. I have been told I look beautiful and healthy.

I have taken steps to remove alot of the loose skin and I do plan on a lower face lift at some point in the future.

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On my face, the only change is that I have bags under my eyes, which I have never had before. Along with a TT and BL im having those bags removed in January as they make me look tired...

Otherwise, I never had many wrinkles and I don't now.

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I went to low with my weight, and when I look back I did look sick. My Surgeon and my PCP got worried that I was losing too much too fast. I got down to 117#'s in 6 months. It was amazing how when I gained 8#'s back, how better I felt. I do think my 124# loss has made me look older. But I really am better off than before. My health has improved so much. The trade off was WORTH IT!!! BTW I'm 60yo and had my RNY when I was 57.

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I don't feel as if I have lost myself. I feel as if I have finally found the woman that has been there all along. I used my fat as a shield from people for many years. I do not miss the fat. I may have some sag here and there, but even for losing 173 pounds, I am pretty toned.

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Some people get fat injections to fill in what may be "harsh" angles. Often under the eyes for dark, deep under eye circles. You could always consider that.

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That's why God allowed us to create Juviderm, Restalyne, Dysport, etc lol

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Honestly speaking losing weight definitely makes your face look older. Everything droops a bit and it takes a while for your brain to catch up with the changes.

That being said, I have never received a negative comment about my looks. I have been told I look beautiful and healthy.

I have taken steps to remove alot of the loose skin and I do plan on a lower face lift at some point in the future.

Before you do a lower face lift, look into Sculptra... It lasts up to 5 years, and actually works to make your body make more collagen rather than just "fill" it in, like Juviderm or Restalyne. I had a huge issue with sagging skin around my lower jaw lines on both sides and the difference was VERY satisfactory. A good dermatologist or facial plastics person needs to administer it- not the nurse practitioner or esthetician. It is much more precise because of its mechanism of use.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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    • bellaamey

      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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